Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I hate it when some random company refers to me as their “customer.” I’m like, look, we had one night of drunken shopping, we are not in a relationship.
  • Scientists say humans are the most evolved, but bears get to get fat all summer and then sleep for four months, so who’s really ahead.
  • Not texting back is only ok when I do it.
  • I don’t want kids, but I do want grandkids. Hoping science finds a way.
  • I don’t hate you. I just don’t like that you exist.
  • Super excited about a brand new week of faking it.