Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

My optimism doesn’t come out of thin air. A flask is involved.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

I hate it when I gain 20 pounds for a role and then realize I’m not an actor.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

You know you’ve mastered marriage when you shout to your husband, “Take the thing off the thing,” and he immediately knows what to do.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

Dates are weird, like, okay I guess I’ll dress up for my romantic interview.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

It used be called “talking to yourself” but the new term for it is “podcasting”.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

Buying a new phone isn’t even satisfying anymore. It’s literally just your old phone with a haircut.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

Who would have thought that eating a can of beans would backfire like this?

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

I bought a little bag of air today. The company that made it was kind enough to put some potato chips in it as well.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

I get it, laundry, no one is doing me either.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

The date abruptly ended over a disagreement on how to pronounce Gnocchi.