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Commentary:
"Sorry, my heart belongs to someone else… my heated car seat! 🚗💕 Who needs a significant other when you have constant warmth and comfort at the touch of a button? #RelationshipGoals"

car, comfort, heated, heated seat, humor, love, relationship, seat, warmth

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

89 shares on Slack this month:

My hobbies include using the TV as background noise while I scroll on my phone.

22 shares on X this month:

Having Christmas off in the middle of the work week and then forcing us to go back to work the next day feels so illegal.

78 shares on Snapchat this month:

If you ever get locked out of your house, talk calmly to the lock. We all know that communication is the key.

62 shares on TikTok this month:

Is it just me, or were we promised a totally different frog-to-prince ratio?

55 shares on X this month:

Hey man, just wanted to reach out and say I loved how much you drank at my wedding last night.

20 shares on WeChat this month:

Remember, for some unknown reason Santa doesn’t make batteries.

58 shares on Messenger this month:

I’m bringing back “holy moly” and nobody can stop me.

54 shares on Twitch this month:

The most productive species of beaver is the Eager.

26 shares on Instagram this month:

Nobody has ever been given a cheeseburger and been upset about it.

49 shares on Facebook this month:

I’d like to have a word with the groundhog before he starts working this year.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

I like it when someone feeds me their food without me asking. I feel like a part of my inner child heals.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

I believe it was Aristotle who once said “The fastest way to get your kids to stop screaming is to also start screaming.”

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

This is the fastest December in the history of all December.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

I have entirely too many new bruises for someone who isn’t getting laid.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

I don’t question my wife’s choices because I’m one of them.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has shared:

Yes officer, I’d like to file a restraining order against my dentist’s appointment reminder system.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

“23 and Me” is how Leonardo DiCaprio RSVPs for events.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has viewed:

Our parents used to drop us off at school with no water bottle, no phone and no snacks, yet somehow we survived.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

Jesus rose from the grave because he forgot to clear his browser history.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

The older I get, the more I understand why Grumpy Old Men exist.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I want him in ways that are deeply deeply upsetting to modern feminism.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Chores give kids a sense of responsibility while teaching relevant life skills such as procrastination.

Just shared via TikTok:

It probably feels so good to ram your head into something as a cat.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

If I were a billionaire, I wouldn’t build rockets to escape to Mars. I would build rockets to make everyone else leave Earth.

Making waves on WeChat:

Your secret is safe with me because I don’t care.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Whoever salts the fries at McDonald’s needs to come do the roads.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I was an ugly baby. It’s been downhill since then.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Had an interview today, and my belly rumbled. The lady goes, “Missed lunch?” I told her, “Nah, I’m hungry for success!”

Shared recently on Pinterest:

What base is it when you’re flirting with a woman, and she asks, “Are you all right”?

Shared recently on Reddit:

Asking him what his favorite dinosaur is on the first date to determine compatibility.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

In a relationship with my heated car seat.

Nothing more humbling than being at a karaoke birthday party with a bunch of singers.

Imagine she’s home alone, bored out of her mind, and she STILL won’t put that laundry away. She is me.

Women in movies look so beautiful when they sleep. Meanwhile, I’m tossing and turning all night like a forgotten 7-Eleven hot dog.

By 30, you should have settled down with an addiction that works for your lifestyle, no second guessing. You go to work, come home, and [addiction].

If ads were a person, it would be that one neighbor who won’t stop talking to you at the most inconvenient of times.

I believe the IRS is days away from having a nuclear weapon.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

In a relationship with my heated car seat.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Nothing more humbling than being at a karaoke birthday party with a bunch of singers.

Imagine she’s home alone, bored out of her mind, and she STILL won’t put that laundry away. She is me.

Women in movies look so beautiful when they sleep. Meanwhile, I’m tossing and turning all night like a forgotten 7-Eleven hot dog.

By 30, you should have settled down with an addiction that works for your lifestyle, no second guessing. You go to work, come home, and [addiction].

If ads were a person, it would be that one neighbor who won’t stop talking to you at the most inconvenient of times.

I believe the IRS is days away from having a nuclear weapon.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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