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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ‡น has downloaded:

Instead of being constantly irritated by other peopleโ€™s flaws, Iโ€™ve decided to become more self-absorbed.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡พ has bookmarked:

I’m always sad when my sandwich is over.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ด has bookmarked:

Forget mini pizzas. I want one so big it needs a forklift to rotate it.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡ฐ has copied:

Imagine if every time you stepped into an elevator, it played the “Mission Impossible” theme.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฐ๐Ÿ‡ฎ has shared:

Aliens are gonna be super confused when they show up threatening to overthrow our leaders and weโ€™re all stoked and offer to help.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ฑ has bookmarked:

Whoever said โ€œout of sight, out of mindโ€ never had a spider disappear inside their tent.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ถ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has shared:

My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, and Iโ€™m like, cool, can one of you reach the top shelf for me.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฐ๐Ÿ‡ผ has bookmarked:

It got weird when I thought both arm rests at the movie theatre were mine.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ฌ has copied:

I hate it when someone gives me a valid solution to my problem and I have to find something new to complain about.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ช has copied:

My immune system told me itโ€™s a lover not a fighter.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

2406 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,568

Funny Quotes Topics

15,241

Funny Quotes Images

12,568

Updated

5 minutes ago

Users Online

3,439

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Breaking via Threads:

I need a weighted blanket that wonโ€™t let me get out of bed in the morning.

Just shared via Pinterest:

“You’re so chill.” Thanks, I gave up.

Going viral on YouTube:

Roses are red, my name is not Dave, this makes no sense, microwave.

Trending via Reddit:

Might put on a bikini and run through your DMs.

Trending via Facebook:

Sometimes being on your phone all day is your destiny.

Breaking via Pinterest:

In case you wanna quit vaping, I’d suggest using a harmonica.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

You’re an adult. You can do what you want. Waitโ€ฆYou have kids? Never mind.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

The great thing about having pet insurance is that while our dachshund is at the vets, they’ve given us a courtesy poodle to hang out with.

Trending via Instagram:

Do you think I’ll read a book again at some point or will I continue to dumb myself down with 12 hours of screen time?

Broadcasted on Instagram:

If youโ€™re ever wondering what to do in an uncomfortable situation, just think โ€œWhat would teenage me do?โ€ And then do the opposite of that.

In a room full of art, I’d still stare at you.

In a room full of art, I’d still stare at you.
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Commentary:
"Looks like someone's mastered the art of attention-stealing! ๐ŸŽจ๐Ÿ˜ Who needs a gallery when you've got captivating company right in front of you? ๐Ÿ˜‚ #AllEyesOnYou"

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Welcome to Wordgag! ๐Ÿ˜‰โœŒ๏ธ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ’ฅ

Trending Funny Quotes ๐Ÿ“ˆ

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

2406 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,568

Funny Quotes Topics

15,241

Funny Quotes Images

12,568

Updated

5 minutes ago

Users Online

3,465

Funny Quotes of the Month ๐Ÿš€

Funny Quotes of the Year โญ

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ท๐Ÿ‡ด has bookmarked:

How old were you when you realized others couldnโ€™t see the matrix?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ง has shared:

I made soup while whispering โ€œHe was never mine,โ€ like itโ€™s 1893, and I just lost my beloved to a duel.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฉ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has downloaded:

An introvert walked into a bar. Just kidding. The introvert stayed home.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ฉ has bookmarked:

Eating trail mix should count as hiking.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡ท has downloaded:

Oh you won a gold medal at the Olympics? My watch just congratulated me for standing up.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡น has downloaded:

I love when I clean my whole apartment just to sit in it like a Victorian widow waiting for bad news.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ท๐Ÿ‡ผ has downloaded:

She didn’t leave you on read, bro. You left her on speechless.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ง has bookmarked:

Apparently I lack empathy, according to some stupid cow in HR.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ซ has copied:

A good substitute for love and and personal fulfillment is a big bowl of fries.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ฑ has viewed:

Just stay single, yโ€™allโ€ฆ Iโ€™m here apologizing for taking a nap.

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Lawyers should get walk-up songs in court like how wrestlers do.

Going viral on Reddit:

The secret to a good marriage is that itโ€™s all about give and take. Giving each other frequent back rubs and ordering lots of takeout.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Imagine how scary sharks would be if they wore necklaces made out of our teeth.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

It was the becestershire of times, it was the worcestershire of times.

Seen just now on Discord:

Nice tots you got there. Be a shame if someone tatered em.

Shared recently on Threads:

โ€œYou smell so good!โ€ Okay, so kiss me.

Spotted on Instagram:

I haven’t exaggerated in like a million years.

Spreading quickly via X:

Soup is great for when you’re hungry but want to still feel hungry afterward.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

I don’t hate you. I just don’t like that you exist.

Just shared via Threads:

I love when women move on. Itโ€™s my favourite genre.

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