29 funny stare quotes - Wordgag

I have a date and nothing to wear. Or as Nietzsche said: If you stare into a closet long enough, the closet stares back at you.

May 22, 2026

I used to think the cat was dumb for staring out the window, waiting for birds, but I’d probably stare too, if occasionally a pizza flew by.

May 22, 2026

If you stare at your face in the back of a spoon you look a lot like someone who doesn’t know how to use cutlery.

May 22, 2026

If you’re going to stare all night and not say hello, do you mind taking your fingers and squishing my head from across the room?

May 21, 2026

Ever read something so magnificently stupid that you have to just stare into space for a little while and reconcile with your brain for having been subjected to it?

May 21, 2026

I shouldn’t have to go to work if it’s rainy. I should get to stare out the window all day like a cat.

May 21, 2026May 21, 2026

In a room full of art, I’d still stare at you.

May 20, 2026

I hate having a messy house. Not enough to actually clean it, but enough to give it a disgusted stare while I peacefully relax on the couch.

May 20, 2026

I get shy when my man stares at me for too long because what if he’s realizing I’m actually a lil ugly.

May 20, 2026

Don’t come to my house unannounced. I will stare at you from my window.

May 19, 2026

Never underestimate my ability to stare out a window and not speak for hours on a car ride.

May 19, 2026

The Gen Z stare. The millennial pause. Instead, let’s talk about the boomer inappropriate personal question.

May 18, 2026

My superpower? I can look you dead in the face while you’re talking and not hear a damn word you said.

Apr 1, 2026

I hate when someone on a magazine cover stares at me while I eat.

Apr 1, 2026

Women pretending not to see men staring at them is an essential survival skill.

Mar 31, 2026

Tonight, the moon is staring at me.

Mar 31, 2026

Why go to the art museum when I can just stare at you?

Mar 31, 2026

It’s crazy how genuinely entertaining it is to stare into an open fire. That’s some real epigenetic memory shit.

Mar 31, 2026

How I clean my room: 1. Start in one corner. 2. Find something from six years ago and stare at it nostalgically for five hours. 3. Go to bed.

Mar 31, 2026

Sometimes I just stand in the sun and stare at nothing, like a dog.

Mar 30, 2026

Gonna go walk the beach and stare annoyingly at couples. May even growl as I pass by.

Mar 30, 2026

Can’t wait for the day off from work so I can sit on the couch at home and stare at the TV screen while thinking about work.

Mar 30, 2026

Why do babies stare at you like they know you from somewhere?

Mar 29, 2026

I’m having people over to stare at their phones later, if you want to come by.

Mar 29, 2026

I hate when people stare at me and don’t say anything. I mean, if you want an autograph or a picture just ask.

Mar 28, 2026

I don’t miss calls, I stare at them.

Mar 28, 2026

It’s time to stare blankly at my wall for hours straight and think about where I went wrong with my life.

Mar 28, 2026

Any time I throw up, I stare at it like I’m getting a message from the past.

Mar 27, 2026

Me: I’ve always wanted to stare at someone from across the street then disappear when a bus passes. Interviewer: I meant more like “professional goals”.

Mar 27, 2026