Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

Apparently I lack empathy, according to some stupid cow in HR.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has bookmarked:

I lied, there’s no sex. I just needed help getting out of my skinny jeans.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has bookmarked:

A selfie only a mother could like.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

There are more bots on here than in Star Wars.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

I wish my life could have a stats screen but for things I care about. Like how many English Muffins with peanut butter I’ve eaten.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

It really annoys me when people use the wrong word and don’t have the humidity to admit it.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

I listen to a lot of white noise, so I get really excited when it rains or someone turns on a fan. It’s like seeing my favorite band live.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

I like waiters. They bring a lot to the table.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

They should invent more hobbies for people without skills or patience.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

I don’t wanna start the year with any negativity so if you and I have had issues in the past, apologize to me immediately.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,412

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Discord:

In my defense, I was left alone unsupervised.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

I love going “Streets are saying” before I say something I literally just made up.

Seen just now on Reddit:

I’m an over-explainer (I explain things too much).

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

The PhD student is someone who foregoes their current happiness in order to forego future happiness.

Spotted on Slack:

Waitress: “Do you have any questions about the menu?” Me: “What kind of font is this?

Breaking via Facebook:

Microwaves have zero chill. We get it, time is up. Calm down.

Going viral on X:

The older I get, the less surprised I’d be if a random body part just fell off one day.

Seen just now on Slack:

The night terrors don’t scare me half as much as the day terrors.

Just landed via Threads:

The reason the world felt like a better place during your childhood is because you were a child.

Going viral on Telegram:

If you want to feel really bad about yourself, just start dating.

In the coffee shop, booing everyone who orders decaf.

1 month ago

Playful quote about jeering at decaf coffee orders in a lively café setting.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When you order decaf, even the coffee beans start whispering "traitor" 😂☕

booing, coffee, coffee shop, decaf, everyone, humor, shop

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

45 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Snakes don’t hiss anymore, they call you babe, bro, or friend.

73 shares on Snapchat this month:

I don’t get how alcohol turns y’all evil. I just start giggling and get slutty.

25 shares on Twitch this month:

Who needs a weighted blanket when you’ve got the weight of the world?

18 shares on YouTube this month:

The Wi-Fi stops working for 2 minutes, and suddenly I start thinking about life.

97 shares on Twitch this month:

My bed is from Ikea, so it’s more unstable than i am.

19 shares on Telegram this month:

I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

98 shares on WeChat this month:

Stop asking people over 40 what we like to do for fun. You’re not gonna like the answer.

99 shares on WeChat this month:

The moon landing was faked. They actually went to Mars, and I can prove it.

31 shares on Reddit this month:

I took a test to see if I have multiple personalities. I scored 100%, 92% and 88%.

33 shares on Threads this month:

I don’t understand, but I also don’t care… so it works out.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

According to autocorrect, my favorite Star Wars character is Bob’s Feet.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

It’s almost bed time, so I’ll just check my e-mail, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and watch a season of my favorite show on Netflix real quick.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

I might start telling people I’m 10 years older than I actually am just so they can tell me how great I look for my age.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

Can y’all just post your therapist’s advice in the comments so I don’t have to go?

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

When you look this sexy, they should let you leave work early.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has viewed:

If we hadn’t made them extinct, instead of Kung Fu Panda we could have had Tae Kwon Dodo.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has bookmarked:

A middle finger hits different when your nails are done.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

Drunk me promising you anything is the equivalent of a politician giving their manifesto … it’s not gonna happen.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

Due to inflation, you can now eat food that has been on the floor for up to 7.3 seconds.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

A relationship is like a shark, it looks better on TV.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Twitch:

I’m a good listener. If you’re interesting.

Making waves on WeChat:

I took the road less traveled. Where am I?

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Do I need to have seen the Tokyo Olympics in order to understand the Paris ones?

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Oh no, we don’t go in there. That room belongs to the spiders.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

It’s not that I want more shoes, it’s just that they keep making them in my size.

Shared recently on Threads:

Sorry about my behavior as of late. I have plastic in my brain.

Breaking via TikTok:

You look like you suck at Mario Kart.

Breaking via Slack:

Dating after 40 is like trying to find the least damaged item at the thrift store that doesn’t smell.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

My passport probably thinks I’m in prison.

Spotted on X:

Gonna start using “with all dude respect”.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

In the coffee shop, booing everyone who orders decaf.

Some days I feel I’m on top of the world, and other days it feels like the world is on top of me.

Having to pee really puts things into perspective. Like, OK, none of this matters.

Grok, is this true? Grok, am I original? Grok, am I the only one? Grok, am I sexual?

If I learned anything in college, it’s that pepper spray only stings for a couple hours.

True romantics have made peace with the possibility of lifelong solitude.

My role at Thanksgiving dinner is to Blair Witch it alone in the corner.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

In the coffee shop, booing everyone who orders decaf.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Some days I feel I’m on top of the world, and other days it feels like the world is on top of me.

Having to pee really puts things into perspective. Like, OK, none of this matters.

Grok, is this true? Grok, am I original? Grok, am I the only one? Grok, am I sexual?

If I learned anything in college, it’s that pepper spray only stings for a couple hours.

True romantics have made peace with the possibility of lifelong solitude.

My role at Thanksgiving dinner is to Blair Witch it alone in the corner.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨