Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Using incense sticks is like expecting the dazzling show of a sparkler 🎇 and getting a subtle whiff of disappointment instead. They're the ultimate 'sparkle-less' firework of the aromatic world! ✨😂"

comparison, disappointment, expectations, funny comparison, humor, incense, incense stick, just, sparkler, stick

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Massage therapist asked how I felt about chiropractics and I told her the guy who invented it says he learned it from a ghost, and that shut the conversation down pretty quick.

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2 months ago

anecdote, chiropractics, conversation, ghost, guy, humor, i, massage, pretty, quick, shut, therapist, told
I miss the old days back in the 70s, when I didn’t exist.

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2 months ago

70s, back, days, exist, existence, humor, i, miss, nostalgia, old, past, time
Someone you haven’t talked to in forever will show up in your dream just to do a backflip.

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2 months ago

backflip, dream, forever, funny dream, just, memory, show, someone, stranger, surprise, unexpected, unexpected visitor, visitor
After cooking show a dishwashing show with same host but kind of drunk.

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2 months ago

activity, after, cooking, dishwashing, drunk, host, humor, kind, same, show
I can do a lot of things, but listening to someone chew is not one of them.

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2 months ago

annoyance, chew, eating, exaggeration, food, humor, i, listening, lot, peeve, pet, pet peeve, relatable, sensory, someone, sound, things
Sometimes you just need a Saturday to sleep all day and do absolutely nothing.

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3 months ago

absolutely, break, day, doing, doing nothing, just, laziness, nap, need, nothing, recharge, relaxation, rest, Saturday, sleep, sometimes, weekend

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

92 shares on TikTok this month:

Y’all scared to be single, I’m scared to be in another pointless relationship.

92 shares on TikTok this month:

Weekends are a scam. You spend one day exhausted and the other anxious… like, what was that?

37 shares on Facebook this month:

Nobody at this train station knows that there’s a hole in my sock.

64 shares on YouTube this month:

There’s a fat man inside me dying to get out.

60 shares on Twitch this month:

The way people who are really into each other look moments before kissing is so hot. It’s like seeing a glimpse of cannibalism.

35 shares on Snapchat this month:

Before you laugh at kids who believe in Santa, remember there are grown men who believe that Cristiano Ronaldo is a better footballer than Lionel Messi.

59 shares on Instagram this month:

If bugs could talk, they would probably say things like, “What the bug?”

76 shares on Pinterest this month:

Taking screenshots of the screenshots buried in my photo library to ‘bring them to the front.’ It’s not a great system, I admit.

73 shares on TikTok this month:

Roses are red, tacos are delicious. I use paper plates, ’cause I hate doing dishes.

70 shares on WeChat this month:

Everyone loves a little silent treatment on the weekend.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇦 has downloaded:

No, you’re not a “prompt engineer,” you’re a sloperator.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

Girls with long hair will literally leave little traces of themselves wherever they go, like feathers falling from an angel’s wings.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

I told my wife to embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

“It’s all in your head!” Correct! Unfortunately, I am also in there.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

Me leaving the house: I hope I don’t see anyone.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

Unfortunately for the both of us, I really like you.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

I find myself thinking “God, I need a cigarette” way too often for someone who doesn’t actually smoke.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

The art of letting whoever think whatever.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has downloaded:

Sorry for bouncing my leg. I’m not allowed to bash my head into the walls anymore.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

The most avoidant man you know is somewhere telling someone he’s a lover boy.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Everyone loves a little silent treatment on the weekend.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

You’re old if you’re excited to learn how to play Mahjong.

Making waves on TikTok:

Shoutout to all ladies dating silently without making noise on social media. May God give you another man as a bonus.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

People make the mistake of keeping aubergines in the fridge, when in fact they should be kept in the bin.

Broadcasted on Discord:

Relationship status: I’m the only one wearing my hoodies.

Going viral on Threads:

No longer chasing dreams. If they want me, they know where I nap.

Just landed via Instagram:

One year older today, and still no closer to growing up.

Making waves on Threads:

I hate texting someone something freaky at night, and they reply in the morning like it’s still the vibe. Shut up. The sun’s out. I’m pure again.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

Sorry I’m late, I believed the washing machine when it said it only had one minute left in the cycle.

Making waves on Facebook:

I know I seem a little crazy sometimes, but that’s because I AM.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Incense sticks are just disappointing sparklers.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Massage therapist asked how I felt about chiropractics and I told her the guy who invented it says he learned it from a ghost, and that shut the conversation down pretty quick.

I miss the old days back in the 70s, when I didn’t exist.

Someone you haven’t talked to in forever will show up in your dream just to do a backflip.

After cooking show a dishwashing show with same host but kind of drunk.

I can do a lot of things, but listening to someone chew is not one of them.

Sometimes you just need a Saturday to sleep all day and do absolutely nothing.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨