Incense sticks are just disappointing sparklers.

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Kanye is pretty mean for someone with ‘yay’ in their name.

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My wife asked me to put ketchup on the shopping list that I was making, and now, I can’t read anything.

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Within a week, we’ve had a major jewel heist, a mafia-involved poker ring, and sports gambling corruption. We’re living in the 1920s.

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The first two drinks don’t count if you have social anxiety, they just turn you into a normal person.

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Am I the only person who would rather almost fall over carrying the shopping than walk a second time?

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Panda bears are proof that it’s okay to be kind of an idiot as long as you’re super adorable.

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Just heard my knee crack so loud I expected it to glow in the dark.