Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇴 has downloaded:

A sandwich has the power to change your entire life.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

They’re putting me through the penny flattening machine at the zoo.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

Why do we call it tuna fish? Is there any other tuna out there that’s not a fish?

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

“Nobody wants to work anymore!” Personally, I have never wanted to work.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

Quitting my job to focus on decorating the tree.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

Neurodivergents will be like, ‘I’m so tired,’ and then refuse to sleep because they haven’t had enough me time after surviving the day.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has shared:

Adulting is making a phone call, even though you don’t want to.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

I hope whoever came up with the spelling for Wednesday was punished for their actions.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has shared:

If you’re a squatter, every day is leg day.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

How dare this person in traffic hold me up for seconds on the way to a place that doesn’t require my immediate presence?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,333

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Discord:

If there was a pill for procrastination… I’d probably take it tomorrow.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Terrible things can happen if you go camping. For starters, you could want to go camping again.

Seen just now on Messenger:

It doesn’t matter how old you get, buying snacks for a road trip should always look like an unsupervised 9-year-old was given $100.

Making waves on Threads:

TMZ will find out you’re dead before you do.

Trending via X:

Twitter sucks so much, but randomly there are such funny tweets, so I wait, like a frog, for one delicious fly.

Just shared via Instagram:

Going back on a dating app is the new walk of shame.

Spotted on YouTube:

Who are these people that buy unsalted butter on purpose?

Breaking via WhatsApp:

The feminine urge to turn you on and not do anything about it.

Live now on WeChat:

Wish I could get paid just for being a sweetheart.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Fact: Snow in November happens because people decorate for Christmas prematurely. You know who you are. Stop it.

It’s crazy that you don’t really argue with a baby for the first year of its life and then you have to argue with the baby every day.

Playful quote about the amusing shift from silent baby to daily debate partner.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Parenting: where the first year is all about baby talks and giggles 🍼, only for the next year to be filled with negotiations and baby tantrums 🤯👶🤣"

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Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars ⭐

34 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

61 shares on X this month:

Has anyone noticed what it’s beginning to look a lot like?

85 shares on Instagram this month:

Reading for pleasure implies the existence of reading for pain. They’re calling it a PhD.

21 shares on X this month:

When the gun shoots your brain, that’s amore.

66 shares on Snapchat this month:

Doctors who give out lollipops really treat their patients.

25 shares on Instagram this month:

The Bachelor is like “Meet Savannah from Brooklyn, Madison from Savannah, Brooklyn from Madison”

46 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Time needs a speed limit.

66 shares on Twitch this month:

I talk to my dog like she’s human and, like most humans, she looks at me like I’m an idiot.

25 shares on Twitch this month:

I’m so glad when summer is over and I finally don’t have to see any feet on the internet anymore.

88 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Giving all the dogs in my neighborhood matching sweaters for Christmas so they can be in a gang.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

25 folks are currently checking 👀

This is not what adulthood looked like in the brochure.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Can’t say “I’m tired” without my mom making it a competition of who is the most tired and who has more reason to be.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I bet it feels so good for a cat to headbutt someone they adore.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Every family needs a delusional daughter who is ambitious about relieving all her family’s struggles solely by winning the lottery one day.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Nobody talks about the privilege of having a friend who shows interest in your hyperfixations.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Things I don’t want in my future house: An angry man.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

We need a better word for horny that sounds elegant and gorgeous.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Only DM me if you like disappointment.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

90% of parenting is just thinking about when you can lie down again.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Imagine giving someone your heart at Christmas, but the very next day they give it away. Haha, would feel so stupid.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,481

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

A man outside Boots told me that Jesus died for my sins. Thanks for spoiling the end of the Bible. I was only up to the bit with the fish.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has viewed:

McDonald’s is finally promoting good health by making their food unaffordable.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has viewed:

You guys can continue with the week, I’ve stopped here.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

Is ChatGPT my father-in-law because it keeps making stuff up and passing it off as fact?

Someone from 🇬🇼 has shared:

So basically, companies pay YouTube to show ads, and we pay YouTube to not show ads.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has shared:

Watched Titanic for the 14th time. Still sobbing. Still yelling, “SCOOT OVER, COW!” like it’ll change the ending.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

I want this laziness removed from my body.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

I grew up in a kinder, gentler age. We pitied our fools.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has shared:

Why do flat earthers care so much? Like, what if the Earth is flat. What now?

Someone from 🇨🇦 has viewed:

Went to an antique show and people started bidding on me.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via YouTube:

Overthinking should at least burn calories.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I have some fart jokes I’ve been holding in.

Spotted on TikTok:

“Hope this email finds you doing well!” The email found me, therefore I am unwell.

Broadcasted on X:

I’m a huge fan of saying “You’re welcome” really loudly when people don’t say thank you.

Live now on Twitch:

If we get invaded by space aliens, I am immediately defecting to the alien side. Sorry.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

She asked to see where the magic happens, so I showed her my sandwich maker.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Sorry for not keeping in touch. I literally have nothing to say.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I don’t just hold a grudge; I love it, pet it, feed it and take it for long walks on the beach.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Frodo is a beautiful name for a boy. Has a ring to it.

Making waves on Reddit:

Hate when you’re trying to take a nap and the dentist is all “Please open your mouth.”

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