Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

Girls are perverts when they like you.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

Commenting “This could be us” on her pics with her boyfriend.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

I don’t know what’s more fun—grocery shopping or making the old men blush by asking if these melons look ripe.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

(Seeing the guy next to me reading a novel) You know, none of that happened, right?

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

They call it a coffin because they’re finally coughing up that inheritance.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

How many calories do you burn waiting to hear back?

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

Stop using ChatGPT. I can feed you misinformation too and I’m also beautiful and funny sometimes.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

Coffee just tastes better when you are the only one awake in the morning.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

“And on the 7th day he rested”. Obviously God had not yet created laundry at that point.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

I was neglecting my root chakra at the time, your honor.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

240 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,509

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,509

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,720

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Remembering my youth, and a time where I could breath out of more than one nostril at once.

Broadcasted on Threads:

As soon as the sun comes back out, I want a beer. It’s science.

Making waves on Discord:

I read all your bumper stickers and now we’re both stupid.

Just landed via Reddit:

I’m going to try and be less of a people pleaser, is everyone ok with that?

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Nobody victim blames more than my oldest son when he’s in trouble for punching his little brother.

Seen just now on X:

I always have a bad connection in my head when someone tries to explain a card or board game to me.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Called in, “Hey, macarena!” this morning.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

People who leave the blinds closed the entire plane ride: who hurt you?

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Mental state: just googled “When will the sun explode.”

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Ever feel like you’re adulting, but only on the outside? Inside, you’re just a kid hoping someone else will make dinner.

It’s okay to admit you want my lips on yours.

3 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
I'm flattered, but those lips better have a chocolate coating! 🍫😘

admission, admit, flirt, humor, kiss, lips, okay, want, yours

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Can we change the phrase “Can I be frank with you” to “Can I be william with you”? I don’t want to be Frank.

0

3 weeks ago

change, conversation, humor, i, name, phrase, pun, want, wordplay
Thinking of becoming the “where’s my hug” guy in prison.

0

2 months ago

guy, hug, humor, interaction, irony, loneliness, prison, social, social interaction, thinking
Things I hate about group work: The group.

0

2 months ago

collaboration, frustration, group, group work, hate, humor, i, sarcasm, teamwork, things, work
Not to brag, but I ate all of my bananas before they turned brown. Don’t be jealous.

0

2 months ago

bananas, before, brag, bragging, brown, eating, fruit, healthy, healthy snack, humor, i, jealous, jealousy, self-confidence, snack, turned
My favorite recipe is the one where I pick up the phone and order food.

0

2 months ago

convenience, eating, eating out, favorite, food, humor, i, order, phone, pick, recipe, where
I don’t have a favorite vampire. If you ask me, they all suck.

0

2 months ago

comedy, favorite, humor, i, joke, me, suck, vampire, wit

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

80 shares on Facebook this month:

Forget mini pizzas. I want one so big it needs a forklift to rotate it.

34 shares on Instagram this month:

Whenever I go down the stairs next to an escalator, I always move faster than the escalator to prove to the people I made the better decision.

23 shares on WeChat this month:

Non-alcoholic beer is like a vibrator without batteries: it fills you up nicely but without the buzz…

49 shares on Snapchat this month:

Uh oh, said somethin’ weird. Better fix it by saying something even weirder.

92 shares on Pinterest this month:

Me leaving the house: I hope I don’t see anyone.

34 shares on Snapchat this month:

My favorite body lotion is Voltaren.

83 shares on Pinterest this month:

The perfect job for me would be the person staining things for detergent commercials.

24 shares on Reddit this month:

I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.

81 shares on Messenger this month:

Do you ever restart the dryer because you don’t feel like folding the clothes yet?

61 shares on Reddit this month:

“You never reply to messages.” I am just one person, okay? I am understaffed.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

When God created the giraffe, he probably slipped with the mouse on the screen. This is how its neck was created.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

Reading Shakespeare for the first time is crazy because you go, “Oh, that’s where that comes from,” every other page.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

If I eat a magnet, will I become more attractive?

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

I have never seen a single “when animals attack” video that I wasn’t rooting for the animal.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

The older I get, the more I understand why deer run in front of cars.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

Parents will discover a movie on Netflix that you can’t even imagine.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has bookmarked:

I am the human version of tangled headphones.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

It’s interesting growing up and discovering that most adults are not that clever. I had my suspicions as a kid but I didn’t think the situation was this dire.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

At this point, the only thing that can heal me is memory loss.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has copied:

I’m actually not funny. I’m just really mean and people think I’m joking.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on X:

I got confused by all the yard signs, and I think I may have voted for a realtor.

Making waves on Discord:

Within a week, we’ve had a major jewel heist, a mafia-involved poker ring, and sports gambling corruption. We’re living in the 1920s.

Trending via YouTube:

Grown men asking Grok if this is real.

Going bananas on Threads:

Sometimes I see how many vacations people take and I wonder if I’m bad with money or if they are.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

Things were better when the computer lived in its own specific room, and you only went in there sometimes.

Shared recently on Facebook:

My thighs are bigger than my chances in life.

Just shared via Instagram:

When I’m president, I will add an additional hour between 6 and 7pm.

Just landed via WeChat:

Not gonna lie, toddlers absolutely nailed it with naps, buttered noodles, and rejecting authority.

Going viral on Pinterest:

The best time to visit Japan is when you have money!

Breaking via Threads:

On the whole, people are getting smarter. I remember when they had to put “The End” on the screen, so people would know the movie was over.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

It’s okay to admit you want my lips on yours.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Can we change the phrase “Can I be frank with you” to “Can I be william with you”? I don’t want to be Frank.

Thinking of becoming the “where’s my hug” guy in prison.

Things I hate about group work: The group.

Not to brag, but I ate all of my bananas before they turned brown. Don’t be jealous.

My favorite recipe is the one where I pick up the phone and order food.

I don’t have a favorite vampire. If you ask me, they all suck.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨