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Commentary:
"Jingle all the way? More like budget all the way! 🎅💸 Who needs jingle bells when you've got bills to pay, am I right? 😂💰 #Priorities"

Christmas, economy, financial, holiday, humor, jingle, struggle

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I hate when flies rub their disgusting little hands together. What could you possibly be plotting? You can’t even get out of the open window.

0

2 months ago

annoyance, disgusting, even, fly, hands, hate, humor, i, insect, little, open, plotting, rub, together, window
You can’t fix stupid, but you can watch it in action on social media every day.

0

4 days ago

action, daily, daily life, day, every, fix, humor, internet, life, media, observation, social, social media, stupid, watch
Establish dominance at work by drinking iced tea in a wine glass.

0

2 months ago

beverage, confidence, dominance, drinking, glass, humor, iced, iced tea, office, tea, wine, wine glass, work
When pregnant women are around, watch what you say. Nowadays, anything will be used as a name.

0

2 months ago

around, baby, baby names, etiquette, humor, name, names, parenting, pregnant, pregnant woman, say, social, social etiquette, used, watch, watch what you say, woman, women
I like to take long walks away from stupid people.

0

2 months ago

away, distance, humor, i, people, sarcasm, self-care, stupid, take, walks
I’m not shy, I’m holding back my awesomeness so I don’t intimidate you.

0

2 months ago

awesomeness, back, confidence, humor, i, intimidate, personality, self-deprecation, shy

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

57 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Don’t interrupt me while I’m embarrassing myself.

23 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Twitter is a prime example why most of us shouldn’t be left unsupervised.

57 shares on Facebook this month:

Today I couldn’t find a parking space at work, so I drove back home. Looks like they have enough people there.

64 shares on Snapchat this month:

It’s amazing how so many people can rave about Star Wars or Star Trek and at the same time make sure that the only realistic future prospect is Mad Max.

59 shares on Instagram this month:

Crossing things off my to-do list… I didn’t do them, I just don’t want them on my list anymore.

82 shares on YouTube this month:

Stop checking your phone every minute. No one loves you.

100 shares on Instagram this month:

Too many losers and not enough people telling them they’re losers.

97 shares on Facebook this month:

Am I just getting old or are people getting more annoying?

72 shares on TikTok this month:

They say we learn from our mistakes, that’s why I’m making as many as possible. Soon I’ll be a genius.

10 shares on Discord this month:

When I die and y’all go through my search history, you’ll be disappointed to find mostly just definitions for very common words that I wasn’t sure I was using correctly.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

Now I get why my grandma got up early to have a little coffee by herself.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

Fun fact: Malcolm X was not his birth name. He was originally Malcolm Twitter.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

If I were a category, I’d be “miscellaneous.”

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

I like my messages, how I like my nuts – MIXED.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

Being liked at work comes with so many perks, you could be late as hell, and everyone is just happy to see you.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

Why is nobody questioning the quietness of the cosmos?

Someone from 🇺🇦 has downloaded:

I’ve been blocked by better.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

My main takeaway from ‘The Walking Dead’ is that you can still eat the expired canned goods in your pantry.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

l identify as a Christmas tree. Lit on the outside, dead on the inside.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

The question of whether an employer values its employees is sometimes answered by the toilet paper.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via LinkedIn:

The gaps in my resume are from the space bar.

Making waves on Facebook:

First time buying fireworks, and I wasn’t sure I’d picked the right ones until the salesman gave me a wink and high-foured me.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

What’s the opposite of FOMO? The feeling of knowing you made the right decision not going somewhere once you see or hear dispatches from it.

Just landed via Slack:

I hate managing money, I was born to splurge.

Just landed via WeChat:

Being a woman is wild. I just cried, cleaned the house, had a snack, had a bath, and now I’m fine.

Just shared via Snapchat:

By the power vested in me by Facebook, I now pronounce you unfriended and restricted. You may now kiss my butt.

Breaking via Snapchat:

At my size, I’d be called Buffet the Vampire Slayer.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

“I don’t do politics.” Politics will do you, my brother and sister. Politics will do you like mad.

Spotted on TikTok:

I saw an ad for the ultimate dog bed, but my dogs already have the ultimate dog bed. It’s called my bed.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

My daughter says I’m making it up! Do you remember having to carry a quarter for the payphone, just in case?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Jingle all the way? In this economy?

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I hate when flies rub their disgusting little hands together. What could you possibly be plotting? You can’t even get out of the open window.

You can’t fix stupid, but you can watch it in action on social media every day.

Establish dominance at work by drinking iced tea in a wine glass.

When pregnant women are around, watch what you say. Nowadays, anything will be used as a name.

I like to take long walks away from stupid people.

I’m not shy, I’m holding back my awesomeness so I don’t intimidate you.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨