Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

Fact: Snow in November happens because people decorate for Christmas prematurely. You know who you are. Stop it.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

We’re limited only by our imagination and some federal agencies.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

The most embarrassing thing in the world is when you make a fool of yourself in front of a baby and it doesn’t laugh.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

There’s someone in our team who behaves horribly to me and whenever I have to type his name, I’ve taken to using a slightly smaller font size than for everyone else’s.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

Is losing your mind a hobby?

Someone from 🇰🇭 has downloaded:

The good news: once you get a PhD, friends and family will refer to you as doctor. The bad news: They will only do it when you’re wrong.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has viewed:

Messed up and threw a surprise party for my minimalist friend. Now 25 of us are hiding behind the granite orb.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

I’m only here while I wait for that Nigerian prince to follow through on his end of the bargain.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

I hate when people are like “you are so nice”. I’m ugly, I have no other choice.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has shared:

Math is like Chinese to me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,634

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Threads:

I hate when I grab a live wire and everyone sees my damn skeleton.

Going bananas on Slack:

8 planets, 204 countries, thousands of islands, 7 seas, 8 billion people, and I’m single.

Going viral on Telegram:

I have a great poker face because I have no idea what’s going on.

Going viral on Pinterest:

My passport probably thinks I’m in prison.

Making waves on Reddit:

Yes officer, I’d like to file a restraining order against my dentist’s appointment reminder system.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

This gingerbread house isn’t even close to fire safety codes.

Just landed via Instagram:

Everyone is gangster until they’re asked to reveal a “fun fact” about themself as part of a work event icebreaker.

Just shared via X:

The voodoo magic of a tranquil night’s sleep

Freshly posted on Slack:

Emotions? No thanks. I’m trying to cut down.

Going viral on Instagram:

Pinterest recipe so long that it’s now a limited series on Netflix.

Kid, I have jeans older than you.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Wow, kid, I have jeans older than you 👖🕰️! And those jeans definitely have more style and stories to tell than you do! 😜"

age, humor, i, jeans, kid, old, older

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I just can’t watch football, there’s too much “penetration in the backfield” for me to not giggle like an immature maniac.

0

2 months ago

backfield, football, giggle, humor, i, immature, just, maniac, me, much, penetration, sports, too, watch
I’m really looking forward to eight hours of thinking about sleep tonight.

0

2 months ago

anticipation, bedtime, forward, hours, humor, insomnia, irony, looking, rest, sleep, thinking, tonight
That one British friend that’s too bloke.

0

2 months ago

bloke, British, culture, friend, humor, personality, stereotype, too
Does anyone else feel like their brain has a hundred tabs open at once?

0

2 months ago

anyone, brain, confusion, else, feel, humor, hundred, multitasking, once, open, stress, tabs, thoughts
I’m glad cars were invented. Imagine riding a horse at 3 a.m., coming back from the club.

0

2 months ago

3, am, back, car, cars, club, coming, glad, horse, humor, imagine, invention, late, late night, night, riding, transportation
I have a lot in common with AI. We occasionally provide incorrect information with a confident tone.

0

2 months ago

AI, common, comparison, confidence, confident, humor, i, incorrect, incorrect information, information, lot, occasionally, technology, tone

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

81 shares on Reddit this month:

That awkward moment, when all eyes are on the bride, but your son is the groom.

98 shares on Telegram this month:

Facebook is like a never-ending high school reunion.

82 shares on Instagram this month:

Told someone I’m as “single as a pringle and as neato as a dorito” and they blocked me immediately.

73 shares on Reddit this month:

Sane is boring.

26 shares on Twitch this month:

My name is Bob but my friends don’t call me.

38 shares on WeChat this month:

Nothing prepared me for the part of adulthood where you look like a baby deer learning to walk every time you get out of bed in the morning.

45 shares on Facebook this month:

Quality women really do attract everyone. A bright light always attracts all types of bugs.

85 shares on X this month:

Asking my dentist a question, but sticking my fingers in his mouth before he replies.

54 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Don’t date coworkers. Being the hot coworker nobody at work has a chance with is always the best role to play.

62 shares on Messenger this month:

A bathrobe is being naked with plausible deniability and pockets.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

Remember: no matter what anyone else thinks of you, it’s how you delude yourself that matters.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

It’s so hot out here, I saw a bird blowing on a worm before he ate it.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

I’m waiting for the perfect moment to stop procrastinating.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

I’m actually breaking generational curses by surviving my 20s without marrying a man who hates me.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

How can people lift weights? My arms get tired just by putting my hair up in a ponytail.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

Imagine sex with me. No, not like that, you’re doing it all wrong!

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

I tell it like it is: Sometimes I watch the calls on my cell phone and just wait for it to stop ringing.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

As per my last curse, I have no interest in this.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has viewed:

I used to be cool, but now I just can’t wait to get on the couch by 7 p.m., in my pajamas, with a quilted blanket.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

This entire year has been the Nightmare Before Christmas.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Discord:

I believe in Bigfoot because Bigfoot believes in me.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

I’ve already picked out my sweatpants for New Year’s Eve.

Live now on Telegram:

I’m not lazy. I just give my couch the love it deserves.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

I need the youth to start reading. Even if it’s the tag on your underwear. Read it.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I need a chiropractor for my brain.

Breaking via Pinterest:

“You let your cat on the bed?” I would put her on my life insurance.

Going viral on Pinterest:

I’m always happy when I come home from shopping and the note on the table reminds me of what I wanted to buy.

Making waves on Messenger:

I’ve tasted being the bigger person, I’ve also tasted matching energy. I recommend no contact.

Seen just now on Messenger:

If a ham is allowed to spiral then so am I.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Kid, I have jeans older than you.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I just can’t watch football, there’s too much “penetration in the backfield” for me to not giggle like an immature maniac.

I’m really looking forward to eight hours of thinking about sleep tonight.

That one British friend that’s too bloke.

Does anyone else feel like their brain has a hundred tabs open at once?

I’m glad cars were invented. Imagine riding a horse at 3 a.m., coming back from the club.

I have a lot in common with AI. We occasionally provide incorrect information with a confident tone.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨