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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

Today I bought a doughnut without sprinkles. This diet thing is hard.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has bookmarked:

Everybody thinks “Free Hugs” signs are cute, unless you’re a boa constrictor.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

Just realised if I have a kid, they’re likely to see the year 2100… WTF?

Someone from 🇧🇾 has shared:

Lawyers should get walk-up songs in court like how wrestlers do.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has bookmarked:

That moment when you’re reading but realize you forgot to understand.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

A camel walks into a bar and the bartender says, “Hey, you can’t bring your own drinks in here!”

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

I don’t get mad anymore. I’m just like “again?” Ok then.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

We interrupt coverage of one horrible story for breaking news of another horrible story.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has shared:

You ever get into such a weird mood you have to put yourself on house arrest for a couple days?

Someone from 🇵🇬 has bookmarked:

I want to be so rich that when I see a spider in my house I won’t kill it, I’d buy another house.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

241 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,510

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,510

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,340

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Discord:

I love being a girly girl and going to sleep all moisturized, juicy, and soft. Lip balm on. Layering on scents just to beauty rest.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

The females who don’t go through phones will definitely find out through dreams.

Making waves on YouTube:

After my death, I’ll be very busy. The list of people to whom I want to appear as a ghost is getting longer every day.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Signed an Executive Order that you have to give me a little forehead kiss.

Shared recently on Discord:

Waiting patiently for the alien invasion.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

The universe consists of 5% protons, 5% neutrons, 5% electrons, and 85% morons.

Seen just now on WeChat:

The worst part about re-watching Home Alone is you just know Kevin’s parents bought this house for like $250K.

Spotted on Telegram:

Listen kid, I have social media profiles older than you.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Shoutout to the friends that still like me. All two of you.

Making waves on Discord:

Hugging helps break the tension with strangers in elevators.

I’m a red flag, but the material is quality.

6 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Sounds like a luxury car with a check engine light on 😂🚗✨

flag, humor, material, quality, red, red flag, relationship, sarcasm

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

In my 20’s: why is eating healthy such a big deal anyways. In my 40’s: oh.

0

2 months ago

20s, 40s, age, big, deal, eating, health, healthy, humor, lifestyle, oh, realization
If I was a weather man, I’d leak the weather early to pretty women.

0

2 months ago

early, flirting, forecast, humor, i, ID, joke, leak, man, pretty, pretty woman, weather, woman, women
Your honor, if it pleases the court, I brought homemade brownies for everyone.

0

2 months ago

baked, baked goods, browny, court, courtroom, dessert, everyone, funny statement, goods, honor, humor, i, judge, legal, statement, trial
Sorry, I’m late. I got here when I wanted to.

0

2 months ago

attitude, casual, confidence, here, humor, i, late, lateness, punctuality, sarcasm, sorry, wanted
Having a crush on someone is just having a lack of information on someone.

0

2 months ago

attraction, crush, feelings, having, humor, information, just, love, misunderstanding, relationship, someone
Falling off academically is worse than a heartbreak.

0

5 months ago

academics, failure, falling, heartbreak, humor, life, school, student, student life, worse

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

42 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Family Guy is so insane because, why were people dating that dog?

13 shares on Pinterest this month:

I bet my soulmate is out there somewhere pretending everything is fine.

17 shares on YouTube this month:

My mom: sure use any towel. Also my mom: not that one.

12 shares on Threads this month:

Cleaning a house with children in it is like shoveling snow on the North Pole.

75 shares on Pinterest this month:

Probably the most humiliating thing that can happen when you die is that you come back as a fitted-sheet ghost.

12 shares on Discord this month:

Getting road rage alone in my house.

43 shares on Slack this month:

A hot coffee and a crispy bagel doesn’t change anything but it can’t hurt.

73 shares on Messenger this month:

I don’t think human beings were built to know everything going on in the world all the time.

56 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’m so high at Home Depot right now, and I have to ask where the hose at. And I know I’mma laugh when I do.

63 shares on Slack this month:

You can’t make everyone happy. You’re not a jar of Nutella.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

I know I’m almost 40 because I had a few drinks last night and woke up this morning thinking: Oh no I bought so many socks online last night.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

Damn, all this overthinking and I still be making dumb decisions.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

Twitter is like attaching a message to a balloon, hoping that the right person somehow finds and reads it.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has downloaded:

I don’t need to bring anything to a knife fight, because I don’t go to knife fights.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

“New password cannot be your old password” makes me so mad.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has shared:

There’s no sadder tableau in all of humanity than the smoker’s terrarium at the airport.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

So why is it that when Star Trek ‘boldly go where no one has gone before’ they always find someone there?

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

Giving out false information so I know who the leak is.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

Why do my fully charged AirPods deplete at different rates? Do I listen harder out of one ear?

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

My mental health is as reliable as a flashlight in a horror film.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Telegram:

Wow, I absolutely love your outfit. The black really brings out the pet hair on it.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Caveman: I just invented the wheel. Journalist: Here’s why the wheel is bad for humanity.

Just shared via Slack:

I hate having a messy house. Not enough to actually clean it, but enough to give it a disgusted stare while I peacefully relax on the couch.

Just landed via Twitch:

Oh, I shouldn’t worry? Why didn’t I think of that?

Going viral on Instagram:

No one told me adulting would involve trying to avoid so many scams.

Seen just now on Messenger:

My mother told me there is a girl for me in every corner of the earth, but unfortunately the earth is round.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

The idea that the zombies in the 28 Days series exist entirely in Britain is genuinely hilarious. The rest of the world saw that and was like, “Yeah, they can handle it on their own.”

Just shared via Reddit:

Sometimes I’m grateful that thoughts don’t appear as bubbles over our heads.

Just landed via Snapchat:

I really appreciate where you’re coming from. I just wish you’d go back.

Making waves on YouTube:

Ever since I was a little kid, I knew that I wanted to be late for work.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’m a red flag, but the material is quality.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

In my 20’s: why is eating healthy such a big deal anyways. In my 40’s: oh.

If I was a weather man, I’d leak the weather early to pretty women.

Your honor, if it pleases the court, I brought homemade brownies for everyone.

Sorry, I’m late. I got here when I wanted to.

Having a crush on someone is just having a lack of information on someone.

Falling off academically is worse than a heartbreak.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨