Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

Nudes are played out. Send me a video of you reading out loud so I know you’re not dumb.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

My cat just knocked over my coffee mug and looked at me like it was my fault. How dare I put it on the edge of the table?

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

Stop blaming yourself for your failures. Learn astrology and blame the planets.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

Who would have thought that eating a can of beans would backfire like this?

Someone from 🇪🇷 has bookmarked:

I’m gonna start cursing people out but with biblical phrases like I hope your crops wither and bear no fruit and the ravens eat your mustard seeds.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

Forgetting how to clean the dishes and shooting them with a gun.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

Friends with consequences.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

We went out on a boat to see whales and the crew encouraged us to clap and cheer for the whales and boo at the regular fish.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has shared:

According to my Spotify Wrapped, I am what got played the most this year.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has downloaded:

“How am I supposed to avoid Al when I’ve procrastinated on a paper?” With a night full of caffeine and nicotine like your forefathers, you babies.

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

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17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,392

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Reddit:

One of the most disappointing things is when you get a severe thunderstorm warning, and there is no severe thunderstorm.

Going viral on Telegram:

The devil couldn’t reach me, so he made sure that the love I give is never reciprocated.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

My patience is like a gift card, not sure how much is left but lets give it a try.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Thank god I played a lot of Tetris as a kid or I never would have been able to get everything into the freezer.

Trending via Snapchat:

The true horror genre: my old Facebook statuses.

Shared recently on WeChat:

When you meet twins, demand to speak with the one in charge.

Just shared via X:

I think my new neighbors are creeps. They seem to be looking into my window every time I’m looking out my window to see what they are doing.

Going viral on Telegram:

Whoever named it overthinking didn’t think hard enough, cause overthinking is never over.

Seen just now on Discord:

This is no glow. This is the rage that boils inside me.

Trending via Snapchat:

I love staying in a hotel. I’m eating room service in bed while I watch the worst TV show of all time on cable television. I’m working out in the gym and swimming in the pool. I’m using the amenities. To hell with Airbnb.

Mentally saying “Wed-Nes-Day” when writing the word Wednesday.

2 weeks ago

Funny Quotes

Playful quote about mispronouncing Wednesday as "Wed-Nes-Day."

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Commentary:
Trying to spell Wednesday correctly is my weekly brain workout. 🧠💪✨

exercise, funny habit, habit, language, mental, mental exercise, mentally, pronunciation, saying, spelling, Wednesday, word, wordplay, writing

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55 shares on Telegram this month:

Note to self: just because it’s in the map app’s directions, doesn’t mean the road is paved.

45 shares on Reddit this month:

My future husband is very lucky; he will never stay hungry, because I know so many restaurants with delicious food.

50 shares on Snapchat this month:

My kids will never appreciate the amount of extroverting the introvert me does for them.

68 shares on Pinterest this month:

Every time I ask my husband to bring me something out of my purse, without a doubt, he’ll bring me my whole purse. Why are purses so scary to men, lol.

78 shares on Messenger this month:

Whoever created / mandated the auto start-stop feature on cars should be dragged into the town square to be tarred and feathered!

100 shares on Discord this month:

You can tell me what you want, but alcohol and eye contact are a dangerous combination.

81 shares on Threads this month:

Why would I take the high road when I could take the psychopath?

11 shares on Twitch this month:

If I had money, my life would be pretty much the same, but my dogs would destroy much nicer stuff.

22 shares on Twitch this month:

I bet God still calls it Twitter.

97 shares on Messenger this month:

I don’t just hold a grudge; I love it, pet it, feed it and take it for long walks on the beach.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇱 has viewed:

One day you’re cool and then the next, you realize your favorite pair of pants are sweatpants from the grocery store.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has shared:

Skin coloured leggings should be illegal.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

Me: I’ve always wanted to stare at someone from across the street then disappear when a bus passes. Interviewer: I meant more like “professional goals”.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

Leave me alone, man. I’m just living my life like a candle in the wind.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

I hope this out-of-office message finds you well.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

If I ever say “with all due respect”, please understand that there is none.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

I can’t stop thinking about how a tanning bed really turns you into the human version of a gas station hot dog.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

Winter hack: Avoid the cold by never leaving your house.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

Life is a highway: Too many cars, not enough bathrooms.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

The possibility of monsters residing underneath your bed is negated when the mattress is positioned on the floor.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Pinterest:

“I’ll see” = not coming, never was coming, never even considered it.

Just shared via Messenger:

I accidentally messed up my life. How do I start a new account?

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Before marriage, I would sit at a stoplight for hours because I had no one to tell me the light had changed to green.

Spotted on TikTok:

Men look so amazing for people who use the same product for their teeth, hair, floor and car washing.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Dating is so overrated. Let’s just get married.

Seen just now on Telegram:

The feminine urge to start a coven.

Making waves on Telegram:

Do you ever think back about all the crazy stuff you did when you were younger, and wonder how you’re still alive?

Making waves on WeChat:

Today I started gardening. I planted myself in front of the TV and I sat there the entire day.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Not being able to see Likes on posts is a tragedy. Love it when two people are arguing and you can see all their little backup dancers.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Every year I realize how dumb I was a year ago.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Mentally saying “Wed-Nes-Day” when writing the word Wednesday.

My signature move is always learning my lessons the hard way.

Sailors wish they could swear like me.

Actually, no one sees you at your worst like your coworkers do.

Does anyone know if there’s a career in being a piece of shit?

Being a goldfish must be brilliant. Every six seconds you’re pleasantly surprised to find that you live in a castle.

An adventure and a dragon would cure me.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Mentally saying “Wed-Nes-Day” when writing the word Wednesday.

Keep the laugh going 😂

My signature move is always learning my lessons the hard way.

Sailors wish they could swear like me.

Actually, no one sees you at your worst like your coworkers do.

Does anyone know if there’s a career in being a piece of shit?

Being a goldfish must be brilliant. Every six seconds you’re pleasantly surprised to find that you live in a castle.

An adventure and a dragon would cure me.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨