Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Whoever thought a two-day weekend was enough clearly missed the memo on the infinite possibilities of naps and Netflix binges 🛌📺 Don't worry, we've got your back – let's start a petition for a seven-day weekend! 🙌😂"

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

My favorite game is to guess if my headache is due to dehydration, migraine, malnutrition, stress, lack of sleep, poor position, or a brain tumor.

2 months ago

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Think like a crazy person, and then you’ll understand.

2 months ago

crazy, mindset, person, perspective, think, thinking, understand, understanding
If anything goes wrong today, just dramatically whisper, “The prophecy has been fulfilled,” and walk away.

2 months ago

advice, anything, away, dramatic, funny advice, humor, humor tactic, humorous, humorous quote, just, procrastination, prophecy, sarcasm, tactic, today, walk, walk away, whisper, witty, wrong
Turns out “V for Vendetta” is not an educational movie and it won’t teach your kids the alphabet.

2 months ago

alphabet, critique, educational, educational movie, humor, irony, kids, movie, movie critique, teach, v, V for Vendetta, vendetta
The peace of not knowing.

3 weeks ago

calmness, humor, ignorance, irony, knowing, peace
Dear Santa, I’ve been good all year. Most of the time. Once in a while. Never mind, I’ll buy my own stuff.

2 months ago

buy, Christmas, good, honesty, humor, list, mind, never, once, own, Santa, stuff, time, wish, wish list, year

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

82 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m so bored, I’m gonna join a poly-relationship and stage a coup and kick the main one out.

54 shares on Messenger this month:

Situationship where the situation is being madly in love with each other.

13 shares on Threads this month:

Sorry I zoned out during your story… my brain was offering me multiple side quests and overthinking opportunities.

97 shares on Facebook this month:

Twitter is a weapon of mass distraction.

94 shares on Messenger this month:

You can always tell when a man’s mustache is performative and not representative of his true spirit.

77 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The unemployed urge to say I love you during a job interview.

29 shares on Slack this month:

I’m not sure what everyone at my coworking space does for work, but I’m pretty sure one guy’s job is chewing.

24 shares on Slack this month:

When I’m done eating… I have to show my hands to my cat, like I’m a blackjack dealer.

67 shares on X this month:

Gang initiations from the Midwest be like “you have to eat the entire potato salad.”

59 shares on Facebook this month:

The first guy to clap after seeing something cool must have been like “what the hell am I doing?”

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

Nobody says “boom shakalaka” like they used to.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has copied:

It’s actually scary how your whole life depends on how well you did as a teenager.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

Calling the police when someone unfollows.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

Probably the most empowered I’ve ever felt was that time I stuck a fork in a socket.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

Born to hate people. Somehow ended up in customer service.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has bookmarked:

No, they’re not “symptoms of depressions.” They’re Blue’s Clues.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

Someone at work had a 25-year anniversary, and it took everything in me not to say she’s been working longer than I’ve been alive.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

Girls be like, “I hate this man,” then have sex with him.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has copied:

Normalize talking to people in the gym who have earbuds in, they love that.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

Y’all screenshot payment confirmations to make sure they don’t play with y’all too?

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Snapchat:

I know which nation I like best. Hibernation.

Spotted on Threads:

The best way for me to stick to my diet is to go straight back to sleep after breakfast.

Trending via Pinterest:

Problematic bed time gap relationship.

Making waves on Instagram:

I feel sorry for dogs. They learnt to fetch newspapers, but newspapers are dying. Killed by an internet driven by cats.

Going viral on Snapchat:

They should invent a customer service center that isn’t “currently experiencing higher than normal call volume”.

Trending via TikTok:

To my beloved wife, I leave my circus and my monkeys.

Trending via YouTube:

Even wild things have slow mornings.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

I like listening to true crime podcasts while I clean my bathroom because I can pretend I’m destroying evidence.

Broadcasted on Discord:

I love when my brain cells kiss and I have an idea.

Making waves on X:

Do mens sneezes get louder and louder as they age until they explode?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My burning question is who thought a two day weekend would suffice the human body.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

My favorite game is to guess if my headache is due to dehydration, migraine, malnutrition, stress, lack of sleep, poor position, or a brain tumor.

Think like a crazy person, and then you’ll understand.

If anything goes wrong today, just dramatically whisper, “The prophecy has been fulfilled,” and walk away.

Turns out “V for Vendetta” is not an educational movie and it won’t teach your kids the alphabet.

The peace of not knowing.

Dear Santa, I’ve been good all year. Most of the time. Once in a while. Never mind, I’ll buy my own stuff.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨