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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

Seven wives and no alcohol? No thanks, Mormons.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

Every day when I get home, I thank my cats for allowing me to live in their house.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

Don’t believe in yourself, you can’t do it.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

Let’s play a game called you bring me food and I eat it.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has downloaded:

Thanks to social media, you can now meet weirdos from the comfort of your own home.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

I’m going to die from jealousy one day.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

Ouija boards are like unannounced phone calls for ghosts.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

People who get 0-5 likes at max and still tweet all the time… What’s your secret?

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

Please go out, have fun, have friends, make connections. That mysterious lifestyle won’t save you.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

Liking a post I don’t understand just to impress the algorithm.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2268 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,430

Funny Quotes Topics

15,132

Funny Quotes Images

12,430

2 hours ago

3,436

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on X:

My couch better stop looking at me like that, it knows exactly what it’s doing.

Spotted on WeChat:

You’re an atheist? Well, I don’t believe you. See how you like it.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Time needs a speed limit.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

People who live in glass houses shouldn’t change clothes.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

I assume fish have beautiful names for eachother, unpronounceable by human tongues.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Sometimes nature makes art, like trees, waterfalls, and the human butt.

Live now on LinkedIn:

If it turns cold one more time, I’m gonna put the Christmas tree back up.

Just landed via Twitch:

Congratulations to the people who never took their Christmas decorations down. You’re almost there.

Spotted on Facebook:

“Can you explain the gap in your resume?” I went missing in a national park.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I’m a big fan of that post-laundry feeling when you’ve got all your A-list clothes back in the game.

My favorite part of football is when they feed the players water like they’re hamsters.

6 months ago

My favorite part of football is when they feed the players water like they’re hamsters.

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Commentary:
Ah, the classic halftime hydration ritual – the moment of glory when the mighty footballers transform into adorable, oversized hamsters 🐹💦. It's like watching a high-stakes sports version of feeding time at the zoo! Who knew that elite athletes could look so endearing when sipping from those oversized bottles? The magic of sports never ceases to amaze! 🏈😄

animal, animal comparison, comparison, favorite, football, hamsters, humor, players, sport, sport humor, water

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2268 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,430

Funny Quotes Topics

15,132

Funny Quotes Images

12,430

2 hours ago

3,453

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

Stirring up shit at the wedding by going up to random people and saying “I think it’s so brave that you’re here”.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

Forgetting to put jewelry and perfume on is literally the worst feeling.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

“What’s something you’d tell your younger self?” You can have ice cream for dinner, nobody will stop you.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

Waiting for toast to toast takes forever unless you walk away for 10 seconds, then it burns.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

I don’t need the audio tour at the museum, I have my teen to provide critical commentary the entire time.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

We’re living in increasingly unfergalicious times.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

“I asked Grok. I asked ChatGPT.” Yeah, well, I asked my mom. She said no.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

Worst part of a corporate job is no tips. Someone should slip you a $20 if you write a killer email.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

How do I tell the mosquitoes that I don’t consent?

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

I say “long story short” and then tell the story with bonus features.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Discord:

I do block people right away; you’re not going to stress me out on my own phone, with my own internet, and in my own house.

Just landed via TikTok:

One day you’re young and carefree and the next, you’re preheating the bathroom before you go in for a shower.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

My favorite part about going camping is the part where I stay at home, and I don’t go camping.

Trending via Discord:

As a simulation, this all kinda sucks.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Did we do it, did we save the daylight?

Just shared via Facebook:

I wonder if the sun also takes pictures of humanity going down?

Just landed via TikTok:

I like smoke and lightning, your honor, heavy metal thunder, racing with the wind. You know that feeling I am under.

Just landed via Messenger:

One of the kids said, “Camping looks fun,” so tonight we’re watching The Revenant.

Just shared via YouTube:

Pitching a sitcom where all the top people running a major city have been arrested and by chain of command the person in charge is now a librarian.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Caveman: I just invented the wheel. Journalist: Here’s why the wheel is bad for humanity.

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