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"Feeling like a non-stop drama series every therapy session, with plot twists and character development for days! 🍿💁‍♂️ #TherapyGoals"

entertainment, humor, Netflix, original, pay, self-awareness, therapist, therapy, watch

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

You’d seriously think I was wanted for murder by the way I react when someone knocks on the door.

0

2 months ago

anxiety, door, humor, i, introvert, knock, murder, reaction, someone, surprise, think, wanted
My only goal in life is to never end up on a Netflix documentary.

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4 months ago

ambition, documentary, end, entertainment, goal, humor, life, Netflix, never, only
Hey, man, we’re worshiping a false god later. If you wanna pull up.

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1 month ago

casual, false, false god, God, humor, invitation, later, man, pull, slang, worship
I’m not procrastinating. I’m protecting my peace through active avoidance.

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6 months ago

active, avoidance, humor, mindset, peace, procrastination, relaxation, self-care, through
I can’t explain it, but I am very bold and very shy at the same time.

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3 months ago

am, bold, contradiction, explain, humor, i, paradox, personality, same, shy, time
Don’t rub your happiness in people’s faces this Valentine’s Day. Let the couples enjoy themselves for once.

0

2 months ago

celebration, couples, day, enjoy, happiness, humor, irony, let, love, once, relationships, single, valentine’s, Valentine’s Day

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

21 shares on Facebook this month:

November should have one more day. Just because to me November 31st sounds real. And also I don’t want to pay rent tomorrow.

75 shares on Telegram this month:

My boyfriend is mad at me because I keep replying with a fire extinguisher emoji to every girl that comments with a flame emoji on his pictures.

64 shares on Facebook this month:

Whenever my hormones try to get me to reproduce after all, I go to IKEA and watch the goings-on there. After that, I’m good again.

46 shares on Snapchat this month:

Not everyone realizes this, but if you clean the pile of receipts out of a purse and stack them together, it makes a teeny tiny book about why you’re broke.

90 shares on WeChat this month:

This wouldn’t happen to me if I were a huge dragon.

72 shares on Snapchat this month:

Scrolling… good take… bad take… nothing take… cyberbullying… beautiful woman.

70 shares on WeChat this month:

Drive as I say, not as I drive.

51 shares on Threads this month:

For security reasons, I highly recommend that you leave one of your children home during the holidays to set elaborate booby traps in case of intruders.

99 shares on X this month:

If you were a dinosaur, you’d be a Gorgeousaurus.

79 shares on Facebook this month:

Giving out false information so I know who the leak is.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

Cancel culture has been canceled.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

All quiet on the frontal lobe.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

Gentle parenting is making sure your kids can’t hear what you say when you’re peeling a mango.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

Ignored the small door that appeared in my apartment three days ago, and now it’s gone. That’s how it’s done.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has shared:

Stop using ChatGPT. I can feed you misinformation too and I’m also beautiful and funny sometimes.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

Pet owners be like “this is my pet Snoopy, but their nicknames are Booboo and Thicky Boy!”

Someone from 🇱🇾 has shared:

The masculine urge to hitch your pants up after making a minor decision.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

Nature is fascinating. A dandelion makes it through concrete, while I get my head stuck in my sweater in the morning.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

Hey boy, are you my period? Because you’re annoying as hell but I still wanna see you regularly.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

Being bilingual means stuttering in both languages.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on WeChat:

And to my children, I leave 127 open tabs on Safari.

Trending via Threads:

December calories don’t count. That’s the law.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Don’t ever let your computer feel that you’re in a hurry, cause they’re gonna slow down more.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Referring to my boss’s wife as my boss-in-law.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

As a kid, I didn’t understand the subtext of ‘I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus’ at all. I thought Mommy was cheating.

Making waves on Facebook:

I think this man might be the one, I say right before he dumps me and I never hear from him again.

Just landed via YouTube:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to annoy the shit out of a beautiful man for the rest of my life.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Every time I ask my husband to bring me something out of my purse, without a doubt, he’ll bring me my whole purse. Why are purses so scary to men, lol.

Breaking via Telegram:

Gimme coffee or I’ll sleep amok!

Breaking via Threads:

Opposites often not only attract each other, they often also undress each other.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My therapist is so lucky. I’m like a Netflix Original that pays her to watch.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

You’d seriously think I was wanted for murder by the way I react when someone knocks on the door.

My only goal in life is to never end up on a Netflix documentary.

Hey, man, we’re worshiping a false god later. If you wanna pull up.

I’m not procrastinating. I’m protecting my peace through active avoidance.

I can’t explain it, but I am very bold and very shy at the same time.

Don’t rub your happiness in people’s faces this Valentine’s Day. Let the couples enjoy themselves for once.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨