Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

My favorite part about summer is when I get to go back inside where it’s air conditioned.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has shared:

Stop making Fast and Furious movies.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

I love making the whole conversation so awkward that the most anyone can say after is “so yeah…”

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

Sunday should be 48 hours instead of 24 hours, I need more time to be ready for Monday.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

Let’s drink some whiskey and say too much.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has viewed:

69 but we both just farting.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

Reverse cowgirl, so we can both address the elephant in the room.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

Legend says that when you’re overwhelmed and on the edge of a nervous breakdown, a small child will appear and tell you that you made their sandwich wrong.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

Girl math is avoiding shipping costs by buying more.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

More foods should have boats, why should gravy have all the fun?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,306

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Telegram:

90% of my thoughts start with: “What can I eat now?”

Making waves on Discord:

Airports are so funny. Like, “Oh, you’re flying across the country? Would you like to hang out in a mall first?”

Just shared via Twitch:

I don’t think human beings were built to know everything going on in the world all the time.

Trending via Messenger:

I hate taking my pants off at the dentist. So humiliating.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

You don’t have to write every day to be a writer! You just have to feel guilty every day that you don’t.

Trending via Instagram:

Went outside. Touched grass. Got bit by bugs. Zero stars.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I can’t believe I used to think I was stressed in high school.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

They said don’t try this at home, so I’m coming over to your place.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

I can’t believe she picked her husband, her boyfriend and her other boyfriend over me.

Making waves on Twitch:

Why can’t my fat leave me like everything else does?

Normalize bed-rotting in the holidays and not feeling guilty about it for your mental health.

2 hours ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Lying around like a professional sloth is officially self-care training! 🛌😴🦥 #Goals

bed-rotting, bedrotting, feeling, guilt-free, guilty, health, holiday, holidays, mental, mental health, normalize, relaxation, self-care

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Reverse cowgirl is not a fair trade because, why do you get a view of my sexy back, and all I’m seeing are your toes throwing gang signs?

0

2 months ago

back, cowgirl, dating, fair, gang, gang signs, humor, joke, perspective, playful, position, reverse, reverse cowgirl, seeing, sex, sex position, sexy, signs, t, throwing, trade, view, why
My favorite part of adulting is borrowing money from myself and paying myself back.

0

2 months ago

adulting, back, borrowing, favorite, finance, humor, money, myself, paying, paying back, personal, personal finance, self
The Titanic is a great lesson of why “just the tip” can get you into a whole lot of trouble.

0

2 months ago

disaster, great, humor, iceberg, joke, just, lesson, lot, tip, Titanic, trouble, whole, why
Here’s a fun activity you can do with your kids on rainy days when they have too much energy: Go shopping and leave them at home with their dad.

0

2 months ago

activity, dad, day, days, energy, fun, fun activity, home, kids, leave, much, rainy, rainy day, shopping, too
I’m not always a couch potato. For instance, right now I’m a chair potato, and later I’ll be a bed potato.

0

5 months ago

always, bed, bed potato, chair, chair potato, couch, couch potato, humor, later, laziness, potato, relaxation, right
Love to go to hipster restaurants and eat half a grilled cheese off an old license plate.

0

2 months ago

activity, cheese, dining, eat, experience, food, food experience, fun, fun activity, grilled, grilled cheese, half, hipster, hipster restaurant, humor, license, love, old, old license plate, plate, quirky, quirky dining, restaurant

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

100 shares on Pinterest this month:

We’re living in increasingly unfergalicious times.

44 shares on Facebook this month:

My big 3? Yapping, napping & snacking!

84 shares on Slack this month:

It must be hard having an erectile dysfunction.

100 shares on WeChat this month:

Kids are like pancakes. The first one is always a bit strange.

18 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Pharaohs were buried with their hands crossed over their chest because of the belief there would be countless water slides in the after life.

77 shares on Slack this month:

There has been a British voice in my head saying, “Bit sad innit,” for the past few weeks.

26 shares on Telegram this month:

Sorry, I’m late. Time isn’t real, and I’m not convinced I am either.

11 shares on YouTube this month:

If social media has taught me anything, it’s that we are all crazy in a different way.

53 shares on Instagram this month:

My favorite part of parenting is when the kids are bored enough to entertain themselves, but getting to that point is excruciating.

11 shares on X this month:

The difference between me and Superman is that he has super vision, and I need supervision.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

When your kid asks you where the other parent is, they’re really saying that they’d like to speak with the manager.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

My favourite adult hack is when I carefully and thoughtfully put something very important away so I can’t lose it, and then I never find it again.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

Every CVS has its own unique energy that’s powerful enough to exalt or destroy the individual.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has viewed:

My birth year getting a lil too far on those lil scroll lists. I don’t like that.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

“You’re an adult, maybe it’s time to stop fighting with people on the internet.”

Someone from 🇵🇰 has bookmarked:

I’m staying up past midnight this New Year’s eve. Not to welcome the new year, but to make sure this one is over.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

My social circle is so small that when the phone rings, I know it’s scammers.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has downloaded:

Using my one phone call to call Santa.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

After having received my free sample of winter, I would like to cancel my subscription please.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

Sorry, can’t make it, just remembered I don’t want to.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Twitch:

Putting together a piece of furniture today, so my kids are about to learn swear words that haven’t even been invented yet.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Can we bring back the lost art of just hanging out at your friends house doing absolutely nothing?

Going viral on TikTok:

Happy to report that “what time is it/time for you to get a watch” is still being used by the youths.

Seen just now on Twitch:

WhatsApp calls should indicate whose internet is poor to avoid unnecessary arguments.

Trending via Pinterest:

This is about the time of year where my enthusiasm about shoveling snow turns into “it will probably melt on it’s own”.

Making waves on Telegram:

I smoke weed for my mental health and your personal safety.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

Ironically people who are good at giving advice find it difficult to follow their own.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Your posts make me wish I could forget how to read.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

I have no issue with people talking in the morning. But not with me, please!

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Dudes be named Will but won’t.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Normalize bed-rotting in the holidays and not feeling guilty about it for your mental health.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Reverse cowgirl is not a fair trade because, why do you get a view of my sexy back, and all I’m seeing are your toes throwing gang signs?

My favorite part of adulting is borrowing money from myself and paying myself back.

The Titanic is a great lesson of why “just the tip” can get you into a whole lot of trouble.

Here’s a fun activity you can do with your kids on rainy days when they have too much energy: Go shopping and leave them at home with their dad.

I’m not always a couch potato. For instance, right now I’m a chair potato, and later I’ll be a bed potato.

Love to go to hipster restaurants and eat half a grilled cheese off an old license plate.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨