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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇲 has bookmarked:

If you have children, you can experience all human emotions before 9 a.m. on Sundays.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has copied:

The existence of raw sexuality implies the existence of medium sexuality, but also well-done sexuality.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

My toxic trait is binging a show too fast, then getting sad when I have nothing to watch.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

My dream is being pitted against the world’s greatest AI in a writing contest and crafting a story that’s so beautiful that I make the computer cry.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

With a cat on your lap, you deal better with the crap.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

My kid is turning out just like me. Well played, karma. Well-played.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

I aspire to be a stay-at-home mom with no kids.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

Money talks, but all mine ever says is goodbye.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

My wife has a weird habit of starting conversations by saying, “Are you even listening to me?”

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

Notifications are a reminder that you exist.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,474

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on TikTok:

Wait. We’re now turning plants into burgers? Haven’t cows been doing that like, forever.

Trending via TikTok:

Please remember, I am an inspiration for birth control.

Making waves on Telegram:

I want my name to come up when you go to confession.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

A real smart TV would increase the volume when you start eating chips.

Spotted on WeChat:

Everyone says “Do what makes you happy”, until you push them down the stairs.

Just shared via WeChat:

Terrifying if taken literally—if these walls could talk.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Sorry, I missed your call. I watched it ring and everything.

Going bananas on YouTube:

“NOT dishwasher safe!” You’ll be okay, buddy, just do your best in there.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I’m still trying to dig myself out my ringtone debt from the late 90’s.

Just shared via Instagram:

Having to pay to read scientific and scholarly articles is a really disgusting and pathetic practice.

Normalize booing in the workplace.

Playful quote encouraging workplace camaraderie with a humorous take on booing.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
I can't wait to bring my foam finger and popcorn to the next staff meeting 🍿👎😂

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Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

21 shares on Facebook this month:

They say it is hard to look at lips that you are not allowed to kiss. You do not know how hard it is to look at a face that you are not allowed to hit.

76 shares on LinkedIn this month:

There are people that make their bed every morning and people who think it’s a waste of time, and then they marry each other.

31 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My husband is looking for the remote control. I need everyone to stand up for a minute.

23 shares on X this month:

My boyfriend invited the neighbors over for dinner, “sometime,” so now we have to move.

37 shares on Facebook this month:

Whoever named it overthinking didn’t think hard enough, cause overthinking is never over.

69 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I would like to thank everyone who destroyed me into the person I am today.

14 shares on Instagram this month:

People who listen to their sad playlist when they’re happy are a different breed of unstable.

16 shares on Discord this month:

Stop expecting people to be as cool as you, it’s a recipe for disappointment.

71 shares on Discord this month:

One thing I expect that we will learn from the vibe coding era is that most ‘idea guys’ don’t actually have very good ideas.

66 shares on Telegram this month:

I don’t think you all understand. If Taylor Swift didn’t have a private jet, she’d be Taylor Slow.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

He’s a 10, but it’s the pain scale.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

My girlfriend just had a go at me for not glistening, whatever that is.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

The way I forget stuff at my age, I just know it is over for me after 50.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

People who say “teamwork makes the dream work” are the reason that some people want to punch other people in the face.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Gonna go walk the beach and stare annoyingly at couples. May even growl as I pass by.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

The October urge to live in a sleepy seaside town with a horrifying backstory.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

You know what’s worse than someone’s phone alarm playing the tune over and over? Someone else who starts whistling along.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

If someone asks why you’re so pale, simply reply, completely shocked, “You can see me?”

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Soup is great for when you’re hungry but want to still feel hungry afterward.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve always known I wanted to be a woman with a lot of money when I grew up.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,518

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

Therapy? You mean birdwatching.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has shared:

Why can’t Chinese restaurants chop the broccoli in their dishes? I feel like I’m trying to fit an entire bonsai tree into my mouth.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

Short men store so much anger in their little body.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

If my dog knew how many photos I have of him sleeping, he’d file a restraining order against me.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

Good morning, did you have a nice weekend? I ask my many open work tabs.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

You can tell a lot about a person by breaking into their home and going through their belongings.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

Adulting looked way more affordable in the 90’s. I feel scammed.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

Withholding sex from you people isn’t working.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

The elderberry is the wisest and most knowledgeable of all the berries.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

Sometimes I get really mad at myself, but not like mad enough to fight myself or anything like that.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Plot Twist: Your taxes cheated on you.

Trending via TikTok:

If I were Noah, I’d bring three of every animal just to create some drama.

Going viral on Reddit:

Born to screenshot everything and never look at it again.

Trending via Pinterest:

Hate when people ask “why is it called Silence of the Lambs?” Like, did you hear any lambs during the movie? Use your head!

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

One day you’ll meet that amazing person who just gets you, and they won’t text you back either.

Trending via Telegram:

My laptop is overheating because I am doing a really good job.

Shared recently on Telegram:

They’re releasing another “Jurassic” movie. Let me guess: The dinosaurs get loose.

Seen just now on Telegram:

If you’re wondering whether something is A.I. or not, A.I. has already won.

Live now on Snapchat:

Befuddlingly, a palm tree won’t fit in your hand.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Your honor, I have a role to play as the black sheep of the family.

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