Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

Sharks are orcs, dolphins are elves.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

The only thing worse than children talking about sex is adults talking about politics.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

Never meeting another person again, so if I know you already, congrats!

Someone from 🇵🇦 has viewed:

I like to people-watch, but I’m an advanced people-watcher. When I spot another people-watcher, I like to watch them watching other people.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has shared:

No one tells you that the older you get, the more often you check your weather app.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

Women don’t apologize. They sleep naked and let you decide whether you are still angry or not.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has bookmarked:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here looking at soup recipes.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has shared:

Who called it a Cybertruck and not a Deplorean?

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

What’s the best job for someone who cries very easily and cannot handle any criticism?

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

Love it when my brain is like, “You forgot something,” and then refuses to elaborate.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

243 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,512

Funny Quotes Topics

17,578

Funny Quotes Images

15,512

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,649

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Twitch:

No more fun facts. I want to know what your last nightmare was about.

Going viral on Pinterest:

I hate how what would have been a parody is now reality.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

Sorry I’m late, my dog was sleeping in the shape of a donut and I had to take so many photos.

Making waves on TikTok:

Fact: WhatsApp is the most boring app if you’re single.

Making waves on Instagram:

When Dr. Seuss wrote, “Oh, The Places You’ll Go,” he did not consider how comfortable my couch would be.

Just landed via YouTube:

“There’s something beautifully intimate about never speaking to a person again.”

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Many people love saying, “Get these away from me,” after eating a few chips.

Making waves on X:

Body: Time to sleep. Brain: Hey, that’s an interesting thought, here’s six billion more.

Breaking via YouTube:

I woke up, got out of bed, and had coffee. I think that’s enough for one day.

Just landed via Facebook:

I hope the ghost of Michael Jackson Hee-Hee’s in your ear while you tryna sleep.

Pretending to be a well-adjusted, functioning adult is so exhausting.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Adulting Level: Master… of Naps and Coffee Breaks! ☕😴😂

adult, exhausting, exhaustion, functioning, humor, life, life struggle, pretending, struggle, well-adjusted

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Don’t throw hate at me, throw money!

0

2 months ago

hate, humor, me, money, sarcasm, throw
I don’t want to alarm anyone, but my doctor says I have an irreversible terminal condition called aging.

0

2 months ago

aging, alarm, condition, doctor, humor, i, irreversible, life, terminal, want
It’s like ten thousand views when all you need is a like.

0

2 months ago

engagement, frustration, humor, media, metrics, need, popularity, social, social media, ten, views
Start every phone call with “My battery is at 5%” so you can hang up whenever you want.

0

2 months ago

battery, call, conversation, every, excuse, hang, hang up, humor, phone, phone call, start, trick, want, whenever
We should make a new internet that’s as hard to use as the old internet was, so anyone that’s too stupid to have used the internet 20 years ago can’t get on it.

0

2 months ago

20, access, age, ago, anyone, digital, digital age, experience, hard, humor, internet, internet user, new, old, old internet, online, online access, sarcasm, should, stupid, technology, too, usability, used, user, user experience
The most romantic minds of our time are being subjected to situationships.

0

4 months ago

being, dating, life, love, love life, mind, minds, modern, modern love, most, relationship, romance, romantic, romantic mind, situationship, time

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

72 shares on WeChat this month:

Silence is my favourite form of communication in the morning.

64 shares on Reddit this month:

Some of you are still single because, when someone sends you romantic words, you reply with “hahaha.”

42 shares on Threads this month:

I enjoy long walks up and down my stairs trying to remember what I was supposed to be doing.

23 shares on Snapchat this month:

As a girl, I should be allowed to speak to the moon directly.

78 shares on Reddit this month:

One night stands just make more sense for single people. Why would you need a night stand on both sides of the bed?

13 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Waiting in the grocery store parking lot for the rotisserie chickens to be ready. The thrill of the hunt.

71 shares on Messenger this month:

Getting a second opinion about my Tamagotchi’s health.

56 shares on Reddit this month:

My kids wanted a spooky story from the olden days so I told them the internet used to scream when you turned it on.

84 shares on Snapchat this month:

Cicadas are all like, “Y’all mind if I scream?”

96 shares on YouTube this month:

I don’t know what millennial needs to hear this, but throw away the box your phone came in. You don’t need it. You will never need it.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

Being gracefully insane is the secret to staying somewhat sane in an insane world.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

Men are only nice for 3 weeks, then surprise you with another personality.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

Can you imagine how hot I’d be if I ate right and took care of my body? I’m not gonna do it, but can you imagine?

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I hate the sounds you make when you chew.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

Christmas decor isn’t meant to be sleek and minimalist, it is supposed to look like joy threw up in your house.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

You wear a white shirt and all of a sudden everybody wants to go eat spaghetti.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

I’m sick of getting woken up at 6am by the bin men. I just want a nice sleep but they always insist that I get out of the bin before they collect it.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

Tweeting with no audience feels like screaming jokes into a cornfield.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

No, you don’t understand. This is my special mistake. I keep making it because it is very dear to me, like an old friend.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has downloaded:

Tried counting sheep, but now I’m emotionally invested in their backstories and I think one might need therapy.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Facebook:

The meeting of the Anonymous Pessimists was canceled. It wouldn’t have helped anyway.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Breaking news: you’re way less interesting than you think you are.

Spotted on Slack:

My retirement plan is recording a hit Christmas song. I just need to learn how to sing and write music.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I’m delusional but self-aware, I call that Delaware.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Santa keeps a pair of mounted antlers over his fireplace to keep the reindeer from unionizing.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

A cheat code to adulting is to always have something to look forward to, no matter how small or big.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

The year I was born, getting a little far on that little scrolly thing.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I want someone who will look at me the same way I look at chocolate cake.

Going bananas on Facebook:

Even in my early 20’s, I was diagnosed with late stage 40’s.

Going bananas on WeChat:

If you drink a lot of water, you won’t have time for other people’s drama because you’ll be too busy looking for a bathroom.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Pretending to be a well-adjusted, functioning adult is so exhausting.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Don’t throw hate at me, throw money!

I don’t want to alarm anyone, but my doctor says I have an irreversible terminal condition called aging.

It’s like ten thousand views when all you need is a like.

Start every phone call with “My battery is at 5%” so you can hang up whenever you want.

We should make a new internet that’s as hard to use as the old internet was, so anyone that’s too stupid to have used the internet 20 years ago can’t get on it.

The most romantic minds of our time are being subjected to situationships.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨