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Commentary:
"Santa baby, forget the fancy gifts, just give me some mental stability this year! 🎅🧠 Oh, what a merry and mentally sound Christmas it would be! 🎄😄 #Priorities"

baby, Christmas, gift, holiday, humor, me, mental, mental stability, Santa, stability, tree, under, wish

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I have no issue with people talking in the morning. But not with me, please!

0

2 months ago

humor, i, interaction, issue, me, morning, people, preference, silence, social, social interaction, talking
Feels like if cicadas are allowed to just sit in a tree and scream, I should also be.

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3 months ago

allowed, cicada, feels, frustration, humor, i, just, nature, relaxation, scream, should, sit, tree
Vanilla perfumes are so nice. It’s like walking into a bakery but you are the bakery.

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2 months ago

bakery, experience, food, humor, nice, perfume, scent, vanilla, walking
I wonder if Mary and Joseph hated putting away the Christmas stuff as much as I do.

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2 months ago

away, Christmas, decorations, holiday, humor, i, Joseph, Mary, much, procrastination, putting, putting away, relatable, stuff, wonder
“I’m depressed because there’s not enough cheese in this world to satisfy my hunger for it.”

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2 months ago

cheese, craving, depressed, depression, enough, food, humor, hunger, world
I love when my grandma texts me — because I know it took her an hour.

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2 months ago

family, gap, generational, generational gap, grandma, hour, humor, i, know, love, me, patience, technology, texting, texts

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

69 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Phone addiction got so bad that watching a movie feels productive.

36 shares on YouTube this month:

There must be an opposite of suicide, where someone suddenly and radically decides to start living, and rescues their own life from meaninglessness.

52 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Everyone’s an empath until I need to borrow some cash.

58 shares on Slack this month:

Bugs Bunny was my introduction to opera. Can’t say I’ve kept up with it much since.

75 shares on Slack this month:

Cheating on an exam by memorizing all the content beforehand so I can easily answer the questions.

95 shares on Reddit this month:

No thank you, I only like men who have no interest in me.

90 shares on Telegram this month:

Welcome to your 40s. Your ability to be sneaky will now be hindered by your bones cracking when you walk.

12 shares on Slack this month:

Drugs and alcohol take years off your life and give them to Keith Richards.

70 shares on YouTube this month:

(Making small talk with a couple) So have you guys ever cheated on each other?

81 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Hey, boy, are you the worst-case scenario? Because you’re all I think about.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

“You look tired.” Yes, bro, I stayed up all night obsessing over things I have no control over.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has shared:

I know it’s true because the people on the internet said so.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

Remember when downloading a song in under 5 minutes was considered progress?

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

Okay, this integrity isn’t going to compromise itself.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

We hate the same people and it’s so romantic.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

Life tip: If all of your bathrooms are full and you’re waiting for someone to finish, just turn off the WiFi in the house.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

Elections is like waiting for the results of a biopsy, except half your family hopes it’s cancer.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has viewed:

You’ll be watching a series, and they’ll just randomly start playing the best song you’ve ever heard in your life.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has downloaded:

I have consumed so much potato salad the last couple of days, I’m sweating mayo.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has shared:

I’ve just found my wide pants again. They weren’t gone at all, they’re just my tight pants now.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on YouTube:

“You just want an easy life.” Should I want a difficult one?

Just shared via Reddit:

Stop blaming others for your mistakes. Study Feng Shui and blame the furniture.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

You know it’s bad when people start telling you, you are the strongest person they’ve ever met.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Nobody sighs louder than an unemployed, debt-free dog who spends at least 16 hours a day sleeping.

Going bananas on Telegram:

Are you just gonna go with the flow until you spiral down the drain?

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Partying hard on this Friday night, and by partying hard, I mean laying on my bed starfish-style.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Work beers should be a daily thing.

Freshly posted on Discord:

The only way to forget the mistakes you made in the past is to make even bigger and graver mistakes in the present.

Making waves on TikTok:

Taking yesterday’s bad mood on a multi-day tour.

Going viral on Telegram:

Sometimes the whole point of going out is to then really savor coming back home.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Santa baby, slip some mental stability under the tree, for me.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I have no issue with people talking in the morning. But not with me, please!

Feels like if cicadas are allowed to just sit in a tree and scream, I should also be.

Vanilla perfumes are so nice. It’s like walking into a bakery but you are the bakery.

I wonder if Mary and Joseph hated putting away the Christmas stuff as much as I do.

“I’m depressed because there’s not enough cheese in this world to satisfy my hunger for it.”

I love when my grandma texts me — because I know it took her an hour.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨