Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • My superpower is to make anyone I wanna make comfortable feel uncomfortable.
  • Beer is like the color black: it goes with everything.
  • Telling my boss I wasn’t drunk really backfired. I probably should have waited until he asked.
  • Horoscope: Many good things are in store for you! Unfortunately, the store is closed for repairs.
  • I tell it like it is: Sometimes I watch the calls on my cell phone and just wait for it to stop ringing.
  • You learn a lot about someone when you marry them. For example, I learned I should have married someone else.