Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇷 has downloaded:

People just don’t stop, collaborate, and listen like they used to.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

I lied, I’m jealous. I hope every girl who looks at you gets clipped by a meteor.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

Gang initiations from the Midwest be like “you have to eat the entire potato salad.”

Someone from 🇧🇷 has downloaded:

Them: OMG, I haven’t seen you in so long. Me: Yeah, that was on purpose.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

Doctor advised me to stop drinking. This is going to be a big change for me. I was with that doctor for decades.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has viewed:

I’m just going to be hotter. It’s easier than being nicer.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

I bet God still calls it Twitter.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

A coffee the size of Manhattan please.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

Sleeping in now means waking up without the alarm clock, but still at the same time.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

His voice was like whiskey. Smooth with a slow burn that lit me up from the inside.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,586

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

At this point of my celibacy, I can see the same colors as mantis shrimp. What do you know about blorange and gurple?

Just landed via Messenger:

Bottle of Worcestershire sauce tipped over in my fridge. The mess is unpronounceable.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

If by ‘leg day’ you mean a day that we put your legs on my shoulders, then yes, I love leg day.

Just shared via Twitch:

I would cry but my makeup is too expensive.

Shared recently on X:

“I thought it might be nice to go round the room and say a bit about ourselves.” Oh dear, you thought wrong.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

The iPhone alarm is so effective that you wake up before it goes off, so you don’t have to listen to such an unbearable noise.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Please don’t use fear to manipulate me. Much more effective to use cake.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Nowadays you don’t even have to go to the zoo. A trip to the mall is enough.

Spotted on WeChat:

I think I’m emotionally constipated because I haven’t given a shit in months.

Just landed via X:

Of course women need more pockets, where are we supposed to hold all of our grudges?

She didn’t leave you on read, bro. You left her on speechless.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Well, well, it looks like someone just got burned with their own fire! Seems like the tables have turned – from leaving her on read to leaving her speechless. Maybe next time, think before you text!

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Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars ⭐

92 shares on Pinterest this month:

You cannot go outside for a year or two. Come back, and the same people still be outside in the same places.

65 shares on TikTok this month:

Even at my most powerful, I’m still a little sleepy.

58 shares on WeChat this month:

Have you ever been in the car with someone who drives like we got extra lives?

51 shares on Slack this month:

Distance is my jam; solitude is my peanut butter.

66 shares on WeChat this month:

I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right louder.

71 shares on Telegram this month:

Pizza rolls are comfort food because they look like little pillows.

14 shares on Slack this month:

I don’t drink alcohol. I like suffering raw.

13 shares on Messenger this month:

Americans are funny, man. “It’s 72 degrees outside.” Bro, I don’t speak oven.

62 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My eye doctor is alarmingly young and when he said he thought I had a chalazion or a hordoleum, I thought he might be referencing Pokémon.

15 shares on Snapchat this month:

“I’ve never done parkour, but I have chased a toddler with an open Sharpie through the house.”

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

10 folks are currently checking 👀

You know you’re the father of teen boys when a shoe print on the ceiling no longer fazes you.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Please don’t ask me about my dream job. I would never work in my dreams.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I say things I don’t mean on spicy chicken.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I could low-key really use a wish right now.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

If you want to sell something to a woman, show her other women using it. If you want to sell something to a man, prove to him no other man has it.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

In an alternate universe, the hard way is always learning me.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

“Autism didn’t exist until recently!” Have you met old guys who work in hardware stores?

24 folks are currently checking 👀

364 days until Christmas, and people already have decorations up. Unbelievable.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Few things in life are as disappointing as having to poop right after a shower.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

In the baking aisle, booing everyone buying imitation vanilla extract.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,500

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

Don’t be ashamed to fart while you urinate, cause there is no rain without thunder.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has viewed:

Today’s youth will never experience the pain of spending all their pocket money on a music album. Because of ONE good song!

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

The best cuddles are the ones where you don’t have to deflate her when you’re done.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

Looking for someone to take to couples therapy and see how long it takes the therapist to notice we don’t know each other.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

To whoever has my voodoo doll, please stop making her go to work.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has downloaded:

Hey there, Delilah, we know you broke that dude’s heart.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

If you’ve seen one shopping centre, you’ve seen a mall.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

We need a slur for people who use ChatGPT.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

I bought a “How to Be Spontaneous” course… it starts in six months.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

The PhD student is someone who foregoes their current happiness in order to forego future happiness.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Slack:

“I” before “E,” except when your foreign neighbor Keith receives eight counterfeit beige sleighs from weird, feisty, caffeinated weightlifters.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Let’s drink some whiskey and say too much.

Trending via Instagram:

I hate being responsible for my own meals because I’ll either spoil myself or starve for most of the day.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

My favorite recipe is the one where I pick up the phone and order food.

Seen just now on Twitch:

You’re really hot. Wanna share microplastics?

Trending via Telegram:

When I was in elementary school, we learned about a shape called a rhombus, and that was the last time I ever heard about that shape ever again.

Breaking via X:

If you think you’re going to be in a dangerous situation, dress accordingly. Don’t wear flip-flops to a bank robbery, for example.

Just landed via Slack:

It’s been my experience that people seem a lot nicer before we get married.

Making waves on Reddit:

Whoever coined the term coined the term coined the term coined the term.

Shared recently on Threads:

The fact that I procrastinate and still get the job done is the reason I still procrastinate.

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