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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡ป has bookmarked:

Don’t break someone’s heart, they have only one. Break their bones, they have 206 of them.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ช has bookmarked:

Girls take a picture of their legs in a bubble bath and say โ€œguess where I amโ€. The library?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ญ has copied:

You do not have to prove your own humanity to others. Unless itโ€™s a captcha.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ฑ has viewed:

You know the trouble with real life? Thereโ€™s no danger music.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ผ has shared:

Marriage is for life. But when that was first said, life was shorter.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡ฐ has copied:

I rode around the block on my bike for the first time in years and now I understand why Lance Armstrong took performance enhancing drugs.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ญ๐Ÿ‡บ has viewed:

I’m trying to be awesome today, but I’m too exhausted from being so awesome yesterday.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡น has downloaded:

Iโ€™ve heard that some people have kids who sleep through the night and Iโ€™d like to know if they use tranquilizers or chloroform.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฐ๐Ÿ‡ผ has viewed:

The feminine urge to act clueless while knowing everything.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ณ has copied:

Got a job rejection, saw the company post the same job again, so I applied again. I decide when we’re done.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

calculatingโ€ฆ

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,670

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Making waves on Telegram:

Cinderella had one night out, and it changed her life. I had one night out, and it changed my credit score.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Having a Bible verse in your bio doesn’t make you a good person.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Nothing betrays your age more than the slang you refuse to let go of.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Ripped a tag off my leggings and did not realize it was load-bearing.

Seen just now on Telegram:

If you love a friend, let them go. If they come back with coffee, it was meant to be.

Just landed via WeChat:

No, I mean, it’s great toast. I just didn’t expect it to be French.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Some people’s high horses are actually donkeys.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

For your own sanity, move on like you never knew them, because in reality, you never did.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I wish I could be as excited about being awake as my dog is about me being awake.

Just shared via TikTok:

The question of whether an employer values its employees is sometimes answered by the toilet paper.

Slim Shady implies the existence of Thicc Sunny.

Humorous text about Slim Shady suggesting Thicc Sunny's existence.
Download image โ†“

Commentary:
Ah, yes, the elusive counterpart to Slim Shady! ๐Ÿ•ถ๏ธ๐Ÿ‘ Move over Slim, Thicc Sunny is here to brighten up your day with some extra sunshine and curves! โ˜€๏ธ๐Ÿ”ฅ Can't handle the heat? You better bring some shades for Thicc Sunny! ๐Ÿ˜Ž๐Ÿ‘ #SlimShady #ThiccSunny

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Keep the laugh going ๐Ÿ˜‚

Trending Funny Quotes ๐Ÿ‘‡

Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars โญ

54 shares on Threads this month:

Nobody at this train station knows that thereโ€™s a hole in my sock.

94 shares on Pinterest this month:

Pro tip: When you sign up for anything online, put the website’s name as your middle name. Now, when you receive spam, you will know who sold your data.

54 shares on YouTube this month:

Might quit my job to focus on summer.

38 shares on Reddit this month:

Quitting my job to focus on watching YouTube.

94 shares on WeChat this month:

The goth urge to live in a haunted Victorian estate and be feared by the townspeople.

95 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Opening up to a woman is like talking to the police, anything you say can and will be used against you.

85 shares on YouTube this month:

Rain cancels plans, upsetting some and delighting others.

23 shares on Telegram this month:

I’m a little too self-aware to enjoy life, and a little too delusional to give up.

92 shares on Twitch this month:

I need a button in Zoom meetings where it just freezes my screen and makes it look like Iโ€™m having network issues.

36 shares on Pinterest this month:

I actually do check to see if you told me happy birthday before I tell you.

Trending Topics ๐Ÿ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes ๐Ÿ’ฅ

22 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

After I get irritated, it takes me about 2 hours to fix my face.

10 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

I look so pretty today. I should go for a walk and let the people enjoy this.

24 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

A wise man once said, โ€œBees don’t waste their time explaining to flies that honey is better than shit.โ€

21 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

No, sorry, next week wonโ€™t work. Iโ€™ll be a shadow of what I once was.

10 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Got my mind on my money and my money is nowhere to be found.

20 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

My favorite part of adulting is borrowing money from myself and paying myself back.

17 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Why do my fully charged AirPods deplete at different rates? Do I listen harder out of one ear?

25 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Being annoying is the most beautiful thing a woman could be.

24 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Doing taxes for an ant who inherited a teaspoon of sugar.

24 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

The cynicism of those who urge me not to do what I can to help the Nigerian royal family.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

calculatingโ€ฆ

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,357

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ‡ฌ has downloaded:

Itโ€™s awkward touching hands with another man inside a popcorn bag, especially if you don’t know the man and he doesn’t know youโ€™re eating his popcorn.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ผ has viewed:

I’m so jealous of people who know how to shut up. I shut up, and subtitles come out my face.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡ท has bookmarked:

Seaweed is great for when you want to eat pure salt but wish it had the texture of slime.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ป has bookmarked:

Iโ€™m not deleting my Twitter, I was here before Elon.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ฎ has shared:

Why do I gotta dress for success? Maybe success could be the one who puts a little more into this relationship.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ณ has downloaded:

I’m experimenting with how many apples I need to eat a day to keep everyone away, whatever their profession.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡พ has downloaded:

It’s so cold, I’m using Chrome instead of Firefox to read the news on my phone, because I need the ads to warm up my phone and hands.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ท has bookmarked:

If you canโ€™t handle me at my worst just imagine how I feel.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ท has copied:

My son got braces today. Yay, he’s not going to be a teenage dad.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ณ has downloaded:

Girl, if the moon can block the sun, then you can definitely block your ex.

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Trending via Messenger:

Wooden pews are designed to maximize the shame of farting in church.

Going bananas on Facebook:

The holidays may be over by my work ethic is still out of the office.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Every time I talk, it sounds like it’s my first time trying to speak.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Might make a living will because I donโ€™t want my family deciding whether to pull the plug. My dad has a long history of being against wasting electricity.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I always stop the microwave before it beeps because it’s not the boss of me.

Going viral on Reddit:

Nobody gives me butterflies anymore. Y’all just give me brain damage.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

I delete posts cause I be getting mature over the hours.

Just landed via X:

364 days until Christmas, and people already have decorations up. Unbelievable.

Just landed via X:

Being in your 20s is crazy because, why did you stay with someone you were that incompatible with for that long?

Spotted on WeChat:

I’m doing a terrific job of not getting anything done today.

ยฉ 2026. All rights reserved.

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