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Commentary:
"Who needs a diploma when you have that sizzling appearance? 🔥🎓 Just remember, PhD in Hotness beats any Ivy League degree hands down! 😎💯 #BeautyOverBrains"

appearance, college, dating, hot, humor, i, importance, important, lesson, life, life lesson, matter, matters, priorities, self-esteem, stress, thing, where

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Pretty sure I need to go back to bed and sleep for 3 days.

3 weeks ago

back, bed, days, exhaustion, humor, i, lazy, need, pretty, rest, sleep
Whenever I feel like I hate my job, I remind myself that I could be a food taster for the emperor.

3 weeks ago

career, emperor, feel, food, hate, humor, i, job, motivation, myself, perspective, positivity, remind, taster, whenever
Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve always known I wanted to be a woman with a lot of money when I grew up.

1 week ago

always, ambition, aspiration, childhood, ever, girl, humor, i, little, lot, money, wanted, woman
“Got milk?” Buddy, I don’t even have self-esteem.

2 weeks ago

buddy, confidence, even, got, humor, i, irony, milk, sarcasm, self-deprecation, self-esteem
“I’m so good at doing nothing. I wish I could get paid for it.”

3 weeks ago

doing, doing nothing, good, humor, i, laziness, motivation, nothing, paid, payment, procrastination, skill, wish, work
You should be able to call in sad to work.

2 weeks ago

able, call, excuses, humor, sad, should, work, workplace

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Social Media Stars ⭐

91 shares on Facebook this month:

4 out 3 people struggle with math.

66 shares on Facebook this month:

Your first non-broke girlfriend will change your whole perspective about relationships.

89 shares on Facebook this month:

Car insurance should give you back money at the end of the year for having no accidents.

75 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Forget sexy talk. I want breakfast talk. Describe those waffles to me nice and slow.

74 shares on Discord this month:

Never underestimate the healing power of a cheeseburger.

74 shares on WeChat this month:

My kid asked where babies come from and I said everywhere, man, they’re worldwide.

35 shares on Facebook this month:

I would cry but my makeup is too expensive.

73 shares on WhatsApp this month:

One big difference between men and women is that if a woman says “Smell this,” it usually smells nice.

39 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Political ads be like: send us money so we can send you more ads.

46 shares on Instagram this month:

If your problem can’t be fixed by coffee, tequila or sex then I’m out of advice.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

Girls on their period: stay away from me; I need you.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

I be having full arguments in my head, then walk around mad like someone actually said something to me.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

I read all your bumper stickers and now we’re both stupid.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

Nowadays an “all-nighter” means I didn’t have to get up to pee.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

The price of groceries has gotten me thinking about what acorns taste like.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has shared:

If a woman watches a TV show alone, who answers all of her questions?

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

My wife just admitted a mistake. What do I have to do now? What does this mean for my future? Help me!

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

I’m not an idiot anymore, universe, please stop with the lessons.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has copied:

Whales go days, sometimes weeks at a time without giving anyone their opinion.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

I offered my nephew a donut and he said “no thanks, I’m not hungry right now” and I don’t think this little guy knows how donuts work.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Painted a big H in my garden to see if I can trap a helicopter. Wish me luck!

Making waves on Threads:

I’m not really a “glass half full” kind of person. I’m more of a “Where’d I put my glass?” kind of person.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Second day without coffee. I can no longer hear out of my left eye.

Just shared via Slack:

I can’t be the only one who screenshots confirmations, even though you’ll get an email and text.

Shared recently on WeChat:

My son is teaching himself Christmas songs on the trumpet, proving things can be both beautiful and annoying.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

“I asked Grok.” “I asked ChatGPT.” Well, I asked R2D2, and he said you’re a loser.

Just shared via WeChat:

The biggest problem with finding another job is I don’t want one.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I was sad, but then I ordered some new clothes. I’m okay now.

Making waves on Messenger:

If you watch soccer backwards, it’s about 11 sad and 11 happy men who nag each other until they get along eventually.

Seen just now on Threads:

Me to alien: I, too, try to live among people undetected.

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Activity Log ✨

The most important thing I learned in life, and I can’t stress enough, it doesn’t matter where you went to college. The only thing that matters is that you’re really hot.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Pretty sure I need to go back to bed and sleep for 3 days.

Whenever I feel like I hate my job, I remind myself that I could be a food taster for the emperor.

Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve always known I wanted to be a woman with a lot of money when I grew up.

“Got milk?” Buddy, I don’t even have self-esteem.

“I’m so good at doing nothing. I wish I could get paid for it.”

You should be able to call in sad to work.

Social Media Stars ⭐

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