Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

Do you ever look into your cats eyes and realize that a person is inside there?

Someone from 🇲🇻 has shared:

I’ve never been cut in half by a magician, but I have worn jeans on Thanksgiving. Same thing.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

People who don’t talk to themselves are the weird ones.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

I love routine. Until I’m bored, then I love excitement. Until I’m overwhelmed, then I love routine.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

Isn’t it beautiful how ‘Bruh’ has stood the test of time all these years.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

The children seemed disappointed when I told them the best part about being an adult is going to bed early.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

I hate small cars that disguise themselves as free parking spaces and drop their masks as soon as you pull up in front of them.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has shared:

Schedule your bikini wax for the first thing in the morning, and you won’t need that cup of coffee.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has viewed:

Have kids so you can say things you never thought you would like “please don’t vacuum your sister”

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

I’m dying for some sweets and the only thing sweet in the house is me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,461

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Messenger:

If we ever make eye contact, just know I imagined way too much already.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

When someone says “I expected more of you”, I’m always like “well who’s fault is that?”

Just shared via Slack:

There’s something so romantic about getting McDonald’s with a lover. Intimate perhaps.

Breaking via Facebook:

Everyone thinks they will be the first person in history to maintain their dignity while posting online.

Just landed via X:

What do you call it when everything pisses you off but you’re good at not murdering people?

Shared recently on WeChat:

The reason I stay up late is because I don’t want my free time to end, and tomorrow to start.

Shared recently on Slack:

Her heart is an abandoned garden filled with ghosts and dying flowers.

Freshly posted on X:

Full-time employment will have you making lists of thoughts to think.

Shared recently on Slack:

If you finish every sentence with “as the prophecy foretold”, your coworkers will leave you alone.

Breaking via TikTok:

I suck at flirting. I be like “is that so?”

Think that’s enough todaying for today.

3 weeks ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When you reach peak 'todaying' and your couch starts calling your name 😅🛋️🔔

casual, casual conversation, conversation, enough, humor, procrastination, think, today, todaying, wordplay

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Jackie Chan used to say “I don’t want trouble“ and then break everybody’s legs.

0

2 months ago

arts, break, chan, humor, i, irony, jackie, Jackie Chan, legs, martial, martial arts, say, trouble, used, want
My favorite type of gender reveal is the one where they just tell me and I don’t have to go to a party to find out.

0

2 months ago

favorite, favorite type, find out, gender, gender reveal, i, just, me, party, reveal, tell, tell me, type, where
I recently discovered “movies.” They’re usually like an hour and a half long, and a pretty good way to kill time. Check it out.

0

1 month ago

activity, check, discovery, entertainment, fun, good, half, hour, humor, i, kill, movie, pretty, time
“It gets to a point” is one of my favourite phrases because it literally does get to a point sometimes.

0

2 months ago

favorite, favorite phrase, favourite, humor, literal, literal meaning, literally, meaning, phrase, phrases, point, sometimes, wordplay
I can sing all the words to the intro song of DuckTales, what’s your flex?

0

2 months ago

activity, childhood, culture, DuckTales, flex, fun, fun activity, intro, intro song, music, nostalgia, pop, pop culture, sing, song
Withholding sex from you people isn’t working.

0

2 months ago

communication, frustration, humor, people, relationship, sex, withholding, working

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

69 shares on Snapchat this month:

If I ever have a daughter, I’m going to call her Erica, but spell it Airwrecka.

31 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Not being able to teleport is a huge inconvenience for me.

95 shares on Pinterest this month:

When someone tells me “They could care less”, instead of the proper “I couldn’t care less”, I always say “At least you care.”

96 shares on Threads this month:

I hope my email finds you enraged.

21 shares on Reddit this month:

I’m either freezing, peeing, or starving.

91 shares on Messenger this month:

I’m letting go of all earthly attachment — exactly like Buddha, except for the things I like and want.

65 shares on TikTok this month:

I’m a “I have an appointment later, so I can’t do anything else for the rest of the day” kind of person.

100 shares on TikTok this month:

Being gracefully insane is the secret to staying somewhat sane in an insane world.

79 shares on YouTube this month:

I miss you (the money I spent).

37 shares on Pinterest this month:

My fantasy is having two men at once. One cooking, one cleaning.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

Wanna come over and see my mis-matched sock collection?

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

Getting the house to yourself for a night is basically winning the lottery.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has downloaded:

Your secret is safe with me because I don’t care.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

“I’m doing better than my parents at my age. They had, like, no followers.”

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

Hey, wanna intertwine delusions and make them a reality or nah?

Someone from 🇨🇿 has copied:

The potholes in my city will change your radio station and unlock the doors.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has downloaded:

I can’t blame this generation too much for doing stupid stuff. My generation thought seven Police Academy movies were a good idea.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

It’s awkward touching hands with another man inside a popcorn bag, especially if you don’t know the man and he doesn’t know you’re eating his popcorn.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has copied:

Sunday without HBO feels like a meal without carbs — empty and deeply wrong.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

11:00 am – Anything is possible. 3:00 pm – But not today.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on YouTube:

You know it’s a fancy restaurant when you have to point at what you want on the menu because you can’t pronounce the name.

Shared recently on X:

Someone has left me a voicemail. I don’t know what to do. Open the phone app? The contacts? Do I turn on the TV?

Going viral on Instagram:

So annoying that in order to meet new people you need to go out and meet new people. Ideally, I would have known you in a past life.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

At the art museum walking slower and observing more than anyone else.

Spotted on Reddit:

No one ever talks about the 6th love language (being annoying).

Going viral on Telegram:

In the 90s, you could tell who won the rap battle by who was still alive.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

The absolute injustice of being asked to come and take away the boxes of junk that you’ve been storing at your parents’ house for 20 years.

Trending via Instagram:

If idiots could fly, TikTok would be an airport.

Just landed via Snapchat:

My favorite yoga pose is reaching for the remote control on the far end of the table without falling off the couch.

Trending via Instagram:

Whenever I go down the stairs next to an escalator, I always move faster than the escalator to prove to the people I made the better decision.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Think that’s enough todaying for today.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Jackie Chan used to say “I don’t want trouble“ and then break everybody’s legs.

My favorite type of gender reveal is the one where they just tell me and I don’t have to go to a party to find out.

I recently discovered “movies.” They’re usually like an hour and a half long, and a pretty good way to kill time. Check it out.

“It gets to a point” is one of my favourite phrases because it literally does get to a point sometimes.

I can sing all the words to the intro song of DuckTales, what’s your flex?

Withholding sex from you people isn’t working.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨