Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Looks like Earth is hosting the universe's most anticipated event – Alien Invasion! 👽🚀 Remember, patience is key… but maybe keep some intergalactic snacks ready, just in case! 🍬🛸"

alien, anticipation, extraterrestrial, humor, invasion, joke, patiently, sci-fi, waiting

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Tuesday is no better than Monday.

3 weeks ago

better, humor, Monday, motivation, procrastination, sarcasm, Tuesday, weekday, workweek
I only write when I am falling in love, or falling apart.

4 weeks ago

am, apart, falling, i, love, only
The first Saw movie should have been called Footloose.

1 month ago

film, film title, Footloose, humor, joke, movie, pun, saw, should, title, wordplay
Fish must think we look so weird with both eyes on the front of our face.

1 month ago

animals, both, eyes, face, fish, front, humor, observation, perspective, think, weird
Free marriage tip: Don’t ask your wife when dinner will be ready while she is mowing the lawn.

3 weeks ago

ask, communication, dinner, free, household, humor, lawn, lawn mower, marriage, mower, mowing, multitasking, ready, relationship, tip, while, wife
If by ‘leg day’ you mean a day that we put your legs on my shoulders, then yes, I love leg day.

3 weeks ago

day, exercise, fitness, gym, humor, i, joke, leg, leg day, legs, love, mean, put, shoulders, workout, yes

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

43 shares on Reddit this month:

If you want to experience hunger, go and live with a wealthy person or family.

63 shares on Reddit this month:

My body snaps, crackles, and pops louder than my cereal.

25 shares on Instagram this month:

Nurse: “This may hurt.” Me: “My life hasn’t been much fun either.”

47 shares on Telegram this month:

Lorebombing is when you make a new friend in your thirties and you have to catch each other up.

81 shares on Threads this month:

Blocking someone isn’t enough, I want them to get lice.

77 shares on X this month:

I live in my own little world. But it’s ok, they know me here.

44 shares on Messenger this month:

Now I get why my grandma got up early to have a little coffee by herself.

62 shares on Telegram this month:

I may be sensitive, but everyone else could be a little kinder, too.

76 shares on Slack this month:

I started my diet 2 hours ago, I’m glad that’s over.

48 shares on Slack this month:

Me, when a 25-year-old talks to me: please be patient with me, I’m from the 1900s.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

It’s always annoying to be woken up by some guy mowing his lawn. Just go around me, man.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

When the blood pressure machine comes out for one person, the whole family has to get involved.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

Is losing your mind a hobby?

Someone from 🇬🇳 has bookmarked:

At least 80% of my day is spent holding back my inappropriate thoughts.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

Your DM doesn’t match the Bible quote in your bio. Uh-oh.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has bookmarked:

How do I get my glasses prescription placed in my windshield?

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

You know it’s been a successful Thanksgiving when your clothes no longer fit.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has copied:

Every time I turn around, it’s Monday.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

I love one-pot recipes. So much less mess than when I was trying to cook things without a pot.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

Getting older is realizing how great doing nothing is.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Pinterest:

Replying to all emails with “ya think?”.

Spotted on TikTok:

My mother always told me, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, say nothing at all.” Needless to say, I’m not much of a conversationalist.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Looking for someone whose favorite thing to do is nothing. No hiking. No adventure. Just bed rot.

Going viral on Messenger:

I typed my name into Google’s search bar and it immediately auto-filled to “Doesn’t even listen to instructions” before crashing under the weight of disappointed search results.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Nothing says “not interested” quite like a Restraining Order.

Seen just now on X:

There hasn’t been a single person in human history that was remembered for spending their life working a 9-5 job.

Trending via Discord:

There’s something so romantic about getting McDonald’s with a lover. Intimate perhaps.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

No more looking back in anger. It’s time to look forward in anger.

Going bananas on Instagram:

Remember the good old days when you didn’t have to wonder if the person messaging you was a bot or not?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Waiting patiently for the alien invasion.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Tuesday is no better than Monday.

I only write when I am falling in love, or falling apart.

The first Saw movie should have been called Footloose.

Fish must think we look so weird with both eyes on the front of our face.

Free marriage tip: Don’t ask your wife when dinner will be ready while she is mowing the lawn.

If by ‘leg day’ you mean a day that we put your legs on my shoulders, then yes, I love leg day.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨