Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

Let’s get married and have kids, so instead of relaxing during weeknights, we can go to seven practices and relearn algebra.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

Welcome to your 40’s: See that kid dressed up like a cop? He is a cop.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

Most of my job is making things idiot proof, but they keep making better idiots.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has shared:

Be so funny that everyone forgets that you are ugly!

Someone from 🇧🇮 has copied:

If the Christians published the Kama Sutra, it would have been one page long.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

Because it is Friday, I will allow one beautiful woman to invite me for drinks.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

The first guy to clap after seeing something cool must have been like “what the hell am I doing?”

Someone from 🇵🇹 has bookmarked:

My dogs have learned that whenever they hear the f-word in the kitchen, there’s now food on the floor.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

Welcome to Twitter, where people never let their lack of knowledge get in the way of expressing a strong opinion.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has viewed:

British people be like “I was born in E-sex, grew up in Woke Ham, moved to Man Chest Hair, went to uni in Rotten Stall.”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,745

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Snapchat:

You should get one IG story in addition to your one phone call when you’re arrested.

Trending via Instagram:

Unloading the dishwasher in the opposite direction just to feel something.

Just landed via WeChat:

If you’re dating an alpha female, you need to know that they need to be babied at night, or else they will turn into a dragon.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

I don’t understand why judges get paid so much, others judge me for free.

Shared recently on Telegram:

I’m 6 donuts away from being the elephant in the room.

Shared recently on YouTube:

My card got declined at the barbershop so they put all the hair in my mouth and squeezed me until it came out of my head.

Spotted on TikTok:

Stop telling people to grow up. Have you seen adults?

Going viral on WeChat:

I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror this morning, so I guess once again my personality will be doing all the work today.

Trending via Threads:

That feeling when it’s Friday, you blink once, and somehow it’s Monday again.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

I’m letting go of all earthly attachment — exactly like Buddha, except for the things I like and want.

When you are stressed you eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets, because stressed spelled backwards is desserts.

1 week ago

Witty quote about stress and desserts, featuring playful wordplay and humorous tone.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Who knew that the secret to managing stress was hidden in the sweet treat aisle all along? It's like our bodies are literally spelling out the solution for us – 'stressed' backwards is 'desserts', so why fight it? Indulge in some tasty therapy and let your inner dessert connoisseur guide you to a stress-free existence!"

cake, chocolate, coping, coping mechanism, cream, dessert, eat, humor, ice, ice cream, mechanism, stress, sweet, wordplay

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

49 shares on X this month:

Why are moths always out at night when they like light so much? Wait til y’all find out about the sun.

64 shares on Telegram this month:

I can’t believe I’m supposed to obey ALL the traffic laws ALL the time.

58 shares on WeChat this month:

If you can figure out how to configure your default state to be slightly amused rather than slightly annoyed, you pretty much enter God Mode.

94 shares on Twitch this month:

If the USA is so great, why did someone make the USB?

28 shares on TikTok this month:

Since I stopped texting first, I haven’t heard from a lot of people in a while.

96 shares on Threads this month:

I want to be cuddled, but I also want to be left alone. Being crazy is hard.

97 shares on Telegram this month:

I love that retail therapy works on me. I am so much happier and at peace when I’m buying things for myself.

17 shares on Twitch this month:

You know it’s bad when people start telling you that you are the strongest person they’ve ever met.

75 shares on TikTok this month:

If you sweat while you eat, it should count as a workout.

76 shares on Snapchat this month:

I received my electricity bill. I think they billed me for sunlight, divine light, and the light at the end of the tunnel.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Good news: I set an all time high today! Bad news: It’s my cholesterol.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Starting the second half of your sandwich is like “hell yeah, baby, let’s run it back!”

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Actually, this email could’ve been a meeting. We could’ve spent an hour on the clock talking shit and gossiping. Someone could’ve brought bagels.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I will always be hotter than everyone who hates me.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Never miss a good chance to shut up.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

One of the biggest struggles of being an adult is deciding what to make for supper. Every. Single. Night.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I lost my composure in 1992. I haven’t seen it since.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Worst part about not buying snacks so you won’t eat snacks is not having snacks when you need a lil snack.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Hey, wanna intertwine delusions and make them a reality or nah?

16 folks are currently checking 👀

‘Sex with your ex’ is so stupid. If you want to dwell on the past, you can just buy a history book.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,640

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

Thought I was a minimalist, turns out I’m just broke.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has copied:

The only appointment I’m ever on time for is disappointment.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

AI is that friend who is always there for you but gives terrible advice.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has viewed:

The world needs to chill out. There’s no way future history teachers can cram all this nonsense into a semester.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

Insomniacs who are not afraid of the dark have nighty-night problems but the pitch ain’t one.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

Unpopular opinion: I do enjoy third-wheeling if the couple is fun.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

Trying is the first step toward failure.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

I’ve got nothing against kids, I just don’t understand why you’d want indoor kids.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

Forget my browser history, when I finally pass from this earth, please delete my calculator history because it’s way more embarrassing.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Snapchat:

Might start signing off emails with, “But what do I know.”

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

To call you stupid would be an insult to stupid people!

Just landed via Pinterest:

Actually, no one sees you at your worst like your coworkers do.

Going bananas on Messenger:

A month in Italy has halved my will to work and doubled my desire for money.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Come on, karma, do your job.

Going bananas on TikTok:

9-5 is really 10-2 if you’re working remote.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

I can turn wine into water about two hours after drinking it. Checkmate Jesus.

Just shared via TikTok:

I love convincing myself iced coffee counts as hydration and self-care.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

My kids practically have medical degrees they’re at the nurse so much.

Trending via Pinterest:

Candy cigarettes really used to be a thing and we really bought them and walked around like we were smokers at the tender age of 6.

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