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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

They say money doesn’t solve all problems, but it will surely solve all of mine.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

Dating profiles should make you share a sound bite of you sneezing.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

We can do things two ways. My way or the right way.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has downloaded:

I thought I needed a drink. Turns out what I really needed was a divorce.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

If I text you an accordion emoji, it means you better start acting accordingly.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

Remember when we were young we wanted to stay up for New Year’s? Now we’re old and cursing because we’re staying up past 9:30 and our entire sleep routine is disturbed.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has bookmarked:

Most people have 32 teeth. Some have 10. Simple meth.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has shared:

Having children is a pyramid scheme.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

I got us matching straight jackets for Christmas.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

A new year resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

831 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,993

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,993

5 hours ago

3,452

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WeChat:

“You’re under the weather?” We all are, idiot. It’s in the sky.

Making waves on Reddit:

Next time you think I am flirting with you, ask yourself if kindness is so rare in your life that you mistake it for desire.

Trending via Discord:

Potatoes make French fries, chips and vodka. It’s like the other vegetables aren’t even trying.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Me at war: You guys mind if I leave a bit early today?

Trending via LinkedIn:

I smoke weed for my mental health and your personal safety.

Just landed via YouTube:

It’s ok to not have a Valentine on Valentine’s Day. I didn’t have a groundhog on Groundhog’s Day.

Shared recently on Twitch:

You are not obligated to post a video of yourself dancing.

Going viral on X:

If you stand too close to me in the check out line, you may as well pay for my stuff while you’re breathing down my neck.

Just shared via Twitch:

Sitting with my legs really wide to experiment with gender.

Just landed via Twitch:

I’m bad at being sad. Three mins later, I’m making jokes about my situation.

When you are stressed you eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets, because stressed spelled backwards is desserts.

4 months ago

When you are stressed you eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets, because stressed spelled backwards is desserts.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Who knew that the secret to managing stress was hidden in the sweet treat aisle all along? It's like our bodies are literally spelling out the solution for us – 'stressed' backwards is 'desserts', so why fight it? Indulge in some tasty therapy and let your inner dessert connoisseur guide you to a stress-free existence!"

cake, chocolate, coping, coping mechanism, cream, dessert, eat, humor, ice, ice cream, mechanism, stress, sweet, wordplay

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

831 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,993

Funny Quotes Topics

13,936

Funny Quotes Images

10,993

5 hours ago

3,423

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

Did it make you feel powerful when you didn’t let me merge onto the highway?

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

No dating apps this year. Just going to walk around and smile at people and send an occasional unhinged DM.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

Some people don’t have a permanent handwriting. It depends on their mood and the pen they use.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has bookmarked:

If humanity is so smart, how come it took thousands of years after the wheel was invented for someone to put them on a suitcase?

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

Lying to stupid people can give you a profound sense of satisfaction, it can also make you president.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has shared:

During winter, it’s either lazy starvation or eight thousand calories in one sitting.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

Toys R Us went out of business because their mascot was a stupid giraffe when it could’ve been a toy dinosaur called the Toysaurus. It was right there man.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

My phone charger is lying in another room. HELP.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

Everyone on the bus thinks that they are the main character, when in reality the main character is the bus.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

Ever since I was a little girl I knew I wanted to leave work early.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Pinterest:

The opposite of “taking candy from a baby” is “putting sunscreen on a toddler.”

Live now on WhatsApp:

Money does not buy happiness, but it’s better to cry in a sports car than on a bicycle.

Trending via WhatsApp:

The gothic urge to live in a sleepy seaside town with a terrifying backstory.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

I’m having a garage sale and hope people I’ve borrowed things from don’t come.

Reported on Pinterest:

Boy, are you a piñata? Because I have an overwhelming urge to beat you with a stick.

Freshly posted on X:

When I put on weight, it’s around my stomach. When I lose weight, it’s around my legs. I’m not a structural engineer, but that can’t be good.

Making waves on Facebook:

It’s so much easier to suggest solutions when you don’t know too much about the problem.

Making waves on Reddit:

My phone went from fully charged to 10% while I was sleeping, so I guess it leads a more exciting nightlife than I do.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Using a condom and still pulling out, call that two-factor authentication.

Trending via Snapchat:

When I hear the word “horror”, the first thing I think of is bills, not Halloween.

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