Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Women call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor.
  • I like my women like I like my glasses: thick, transparent, and uneven.
  • If only my teeth were as white as my legs.
  • I ain’t typing “X” into the URL bar, my wife is right behind me.
  • I am physically, mentally and emotionally ready to enter a new phase in my life…. hibernation.
  • Nothing is riskier than closing your eyes again in the morning for that extra minute of sleep.