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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

I always wait 3 minutes after each post for the applause to die down.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

Me, waiting on an email: What the hell is taking so long, this is ridiculous. Me, sending an email: this can probably wait another three weeks or so.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has downloaded:

Wife bought something on FB Marketplace, but she’s afraid she’ll get kidnapped, so she sends me to pick it up from a guy whose wife sent him because she’s afraid to get kidnapped.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has downloaded:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here plucking chin hairs.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

Ordered a coffee, and the barista said, “Anything else?” and I almost said, “Stability.”

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

Shout out to people jogging in this heat, no, seriously, shout out to make sure they’re okay.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has viewed:

My life is constantly oscillating between “must save money” and “you only live once”.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

Reading for pleasure implies the existence of reading for pain. They’re calling it a PhD.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

I get easily confused in the morning. Also in the afternoon and evening.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has copied:

I’ve been called a lot of things in my life, but nothing worse than being called on the phone.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

[monthly_post_count]

Funny Quotes Total

14,551

Funny Quotes Topics

16,782

Funny Quotes Images

14,551

Nov 27, 2025

3,860

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Pinterest:

Your honor, if it pleases the court, I brought homemade brownies for everyone.

Just shared via Instagram:

I don’t see why walking is healthy. Zombies walk constantly and they look awful.

Going viral on Discord:

Moose would have been a better name for a cow.

Live now on Telegram:

Did you know that it’s actually possible to say, “I don’t know enough about this to have an opinion”?

Shared recently on Facebook:

No offense, fellas, we love compliments, but a compliment from another woman means just a little bit more.

Trending via Instagram:

Mixed signals mean they don’t like you like that. It’s that simple.

Seen just now on X:

“What’s love?” Grandma sliding money into my hand like a drug dealer. Yeah, man, that’s love.

Trending via Slack:

“Where did all your money go?” I’m either wearing it or eating it.

Just landed via Threads:

Never skip the footnotes – it’s here you find out who made the author angry enough to write the article.

Going viral on Telegram:

The nice thing about egotists is that they don’t talk about other people.

I’m tired and drank a lot of coffee, so now I’m tired but faster.

3 weeks ago

I’m tired and drank a lot of coffee, so now I’m tired but faster.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, the classic caffeine conundrum: tired but faster! 💤☕️ Who needs sleep when you have a trusty mug of coffee to zoom through the day at the speed of light? ⚡️😄 Just remember, it's okay to be both exhausted and on the verge of a caffeine-induced frenzy – that's just the daily grind! 😉"

caffeine, coffee, drank, exhaustion, faster, humor, irony, lot, tired

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

[monthly_post_count]

Funny Quotes Total

14,551

Funny Quotes Topics

16,782

Funny Quotes Images

14,551

Nov 27, 2025

3,629

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

Washing your face and water going down your elbow is so sickening.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

My body is 70% water and 30% tired of pretending I know what I’m doing.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

My best friend is married and buying a house. I ate popcorn for dinner.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

If sex was real, I think I would’ve had it by now.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

I was told to be more optimistic so I’ve decided french fries aren’t bad for me.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

Whoever has my voodoo doll, please make it study.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

I’m not falling for it again. These missions have been successful 8 times already.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

The nice thing about egotists is that they don’t talk about other people.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

Schedule your appointment early in the month before your dentist starts fretting about their next boat payment.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

Spending money is too easy. For my bank account’s sake, I need a bridge troll to ask me three riddles before I’m allowed to buy something.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

I want to become so financially stable that God uses my pockets to bless others.

Just shared via Facebook:

Thinking about quitting my job to focus on my girlfriend.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I put the ‘no’ in ‘I will let u know’.

Going bananas on Discord:

A little 9-5 with a little fraud on the side is the only way you gone survive in this world.

Seen just now on Discord:

Sometimes, in the middle of eating a rotisserie chicken, I ask myself “did I just run a red light?”

Seen just now on YouTube:

I believe that emails are trying to tell us something.

Seen just now on WeChat:

The only thing smart about you is your wisdom tooth.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Why do people think it’s ok to ask why a person is single? I don’t ask why you’re unhappily married.

Going viral on TikTok:

I refuse to listen to anyone give commentary on the state of society unless it’s in a TikTok video filmed inside their car.

Just landed via Telegram:

Many people mistakenly believe that diamond is the hardest substance on earth, but in reality it is my husband’s stubborn head.

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