Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

I threw a ball for my dog. May be a little extravagant, but he looks great in a tux.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

Grocery stores should have baskets in the middle of the store for those “I really overestimated how much I can carry” moments.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

Babymaking music but it’s the Benny Hill theme song.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

I’m going to be real pissed if I get my shit together and the world ends.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

They should make you watch a training video and pass a little test before you’re allowed to touch the office coffee maker.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

Them: Money doesn’t bring happiness. Me: Pass the money over here, I like to be sad.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

Life is so exciting. I was in my bedroom and now I’m in the living room. Who knows where I’ll go next.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

I’m doing a challenge called ‘November’ — it’s where I just try to get through every day in the month of November.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

Studies show that people with high IQs tend to be lazy, or something like that. I didn’t read the whole article.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

Always be kind. You never know who might own a hot tub.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

299 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,568

Funny Quotes Topics

17,624

Funny Quotes Images

15,568

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,438

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on TikTok:

Whoever was the first to shorten “Richard” down to “Dick” must have really hated that guy.

Making waves on Discord:

Stop using ChatGPT. You got a question, you come to me first.

Spotted on X:

Dating is the process of meeting someone until you find out what’s wrong with them.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

If you don’t like sports, you are missing a whole world of easy-going conversations with complete strangers.

Breaking via Discord:

People call me a “Trekkie,” but I’m not. I’ve only seen Star Wars a couple of times.

Trending via Telegram:

So I just checked my bank account, and it looks like for Christmas I am getting everyone the thought that counts.

Live now on Messenger:

Buying books and reading them are actually two entirely different hobbies.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Hot singles in your area! They don’t want to talk to you. But they’re there.

Going viral on Discord:

Not to brag, but I can shake your hand and forget your name simultaneously.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

Stupidity begins where irony is no longer understood.

Adulting is getting excited to go home and get into bed.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, the thrill of pyjama parties with my pillow! 🎉😴"

adulting, bed, comfort, excited, excitement, getting, home, humor, life, relaxation

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I’ve decided to cut my carbs… into smaller pieces before eating them.

2 months ago

before, carb, carbs, cut, decision, diet, eating, food, humor, joke, pieces, smaller
That depressing moment when you pull up to work and the building is not engulfed in flames.

2 months ago

building, depressing, disappointment, humor, irony, moment, pull, sarcasm, work
Adulting looked way more affordable in the 90’s. I feel scammed.

2 months ago

90s, adulting, affordability, affordable, feel, humor, i, nostalgia, scam
I can always tell what part of my cycle I’m in by how concerned my friends are over my Tweets.

2 months ago

always, concern, cycle, friends, humor, i, media, mood, over, relationship, social, social media, tell, Tweets
“What’s your music taste?” Don’t know, man. If it sounds good, I’m adding it to the playlist.

2 months ago

attitude, casual, good, humor, know, man, music, music taste, playlist, relaxed, relaxed attitude, sounds, taste
Every Microsoft Teams invite you get lowers your testosterone by 1-2%

2 months ago

12, every, humor, invite, meeting, microsoft, productivity, stress, Teams, technology, testosterone, workplace

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

31 shares on Threads this month:

Grant me the serenity to supernaturally change the things I cannot accept.

14 shares on Discord this month:

People who don’t have a dishwasher, where do they bang their shins?

94 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Monday holds the record for being the worst day of the week.

75 shares on TikTok this month:

I asked my doctor if I’m healthy enough for sex and he told me I’m not even sexy enough for health.

83 shares on TikTok this month:

Having an empty laundry basket is the best 5 seconds of my life.

66 shares on Twitch this month:

Imagine how bored the person who invented mayonnaise must have been.

16 shares on Messenger this month:

My idea of fun is watching something on the TV while I look at relevant Wikipedia articles on my phone.

94 shares on Instagram this month:

Not only do I turn down my radio to find a house or a parking spot, but I also take off my sunglasses to hear someone better.

92 shares on Snapchat this month:

Dear brain, please finally learn the difference between hunger and boredom. I’m getting fat.

21 shares on YouTube this month:

My cat just knocked over my coffee mug and looked at me like it was my fault. How dare I put it on the edge of the table?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

The unemployed urge to say I love you during a job interview.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

In an effort to keep the employees motivated and increase morale, my boss has asked me to stop talking to everyone.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

Think about how many more lovers you’d have if a cross country high-speed rail existed. That’s what they are taking away from you.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

I feel so bad when I overtake an old person on the sidewalk. Like, man, I really didn’t mean to flex on you with my youthful stride.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

Oh, how much I love a Sunday when you don’t have to work the next day.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

People who can’t tell the difference between whole numbers and decimals are missing the point.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

I wish I could be as excited about being awake as my dog is about me being awake.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

I put the dance in “Good riddance!”

Someone from 🇪🇬 has viewed:

I wonder if my bank account thinks about me and has panic attacks.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

When I learned the word “literally,” that was the beginning of the end.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on TikTok:

Coffee doesn’t even work on me anymore. I just drink it because the taste tricks my brain into thinking I’m a functioning adult.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

We’d never met, or even spoken, but I could tell just from gazing into her pale blue eyes I had stepped on her toe.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I’m glad laughter is the best medicine because my insurance sucks.

Going viral on WeChat:

The number of times I stand in a room, staring because I forgot why I walked in there, is embarrassingly high.

Trending via Twitch:

So you like bad boys? Cause I’m bad at everything.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

My cold is worse than yours because it’s happening to me.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Stay humble, you are someone’s weird coworker.

Live now on WeChat:

Who you are when you’re stuck behind a slow driver is the real you.

Spotted on TikTok:

Just a few more hours of scrolling, and then I will finally know.

Going viral on Telegram:

I wonder what John Connor thinks now that everyone is embracing AI.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Adulting is getting excited to go home and get into bed.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I’ve decided to cut my carbs… into smaller pieces before eating them.

That depressing moment when you pull up to work and the building is not engulfed in flames.

Adulting looked way more affordable in the 90’s. I feel scammed.

I can always tell what part of my cycle I’m in by how concerned my friends are over my Tweets.

“What’s your music taste?” Don’t know, man. If it sounds good, I’m adding it to the playlist.

Every Microsoft Teams invite you get lowers your testosterone by 1-2%

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨