Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇹 has viewed:

Tuesday is just another Monday, but reheated.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

Jackie Chan used to say “I don’t want trouble“ and then break everybody’s legs.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

I can’t believe I used to think I was stressed in high school.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

Several of my internal organs hurt, but I’m 100% sure it’s not my body trying to tell me something.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has shared:

I used to think “9 to 5” means a job from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

Humans are the only species that would cut down trees, make paper out of them, and then write “Save the Trees” on it.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

Don’t throw a relationship away just because you don’t agree with their choices, unless they wear Crocs, then it’s okay.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has downloaded:

When I’m not posting or returning messages, just know that I’m probably out doing superhero shit.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

The only problem I have with chocolate is that one minute it’s there and the next it’s not.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

Just because I’m awake doesn’t mean I’m ready to do things.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

241 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,510

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,510

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,366

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Discord:

My keys fell in the snow, and now they’re gone forever — time to start a new life under a new name in a warmer climate.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Some days you have breakfast for dinner and live life on your own terms.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

I had a heated but interesting discussion today and they even agreed with me at the end. That’s exactly why I love talking to myself.

Going viral on X:

I don’t miss calls, I stare at them.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I don’t like the person I become when my boss tells me I should be working while at work.

Going viral on Discord:

Stop eating cakes with the fakes and come eat a bundt with a cundt.

Shared recently on TikTok:

“This would be better if there was cake” really does ring true in any situation.

Shared recently on Facebook:

In high school I was voted “most likely to hold a grudge” and I’m still mad about it.

Shared recently on X:

Name something cuter than a baby in a bucket hat on the beach.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Currently looking for tickets for the first flight back to the ’90s.

Ain’t no girls in my messages, just a bunch of verification codes.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"When even your phone's more concerned about security than your love life! 😂🔐📲 #ForeverVerified"

code, codes, girls, humor, just, loneliness, message, technology, verification, verification code

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Me waking up: wow, I can’t wait to go to sleep tonight.

0

2 months ago

anticipation, daily, daily life, humor, life, me, night, relatable, sleep, wait, waking, waking up
Nothing makes me more stabby than when my husband ignores me and starts talking to the dog.

0

2 months ago

communication, dog, frustration, humor, husband, ignore, me, nothing, pet, relationship, stabby, talking
If Shakespeare were being born today, he’d be “Shaxxespyr.”

0

2 months ago

being, born, culture, humor, literature, modern, name, reference, Shakespeare, today, wordplay
They should have a special lane for texting and driving.

0

2 months ago

distraction, driving, humor, joke, lane, safety, should, special, texting
The older I get, the earlier it gets late.

0

2 months ago

age, age joke, aging, earlier, early, humor, i, irony, joke, late, older, time
Waiting patiently for the alien invasion.

0

2 months ago

alien, anticipation, extraterrestrial, humor, invasion, joke, patiently, sci-fi, waiting

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

47 shares on Pinterest this month:

Everyone’s worried about a recession, but babes, we’re heading for a dark age.

86 shares on Messenger this month:

Why didn’t Scooby Doo smell that the ghosts were human?

31 shares on Slack this month:

Billion dollar technology idea: A printer that works.

16 shares on WeChat this month:

People have ex girlfriends, I have ex crushes.

16 shares on X this month:

Jury duty is a wild concept. Whenever the government wants, they can just be like “Call off work, bestie, we need you to solve a murder. Here’s fifteen dollars.”

66 shares on Threads this month:

Well, well, well, if it isn’t the holiday traffic I said I’d avoid even though I did nothing to avoid it.

31 shares on Instagram this month:

And what do we do when we are sad? “Add to cart”

63 shares on Reddit this month:

I swear, one more minor inconvenience and I’m running away to join the circus.

81 shares on Pinterest this month:

Dear men, my ‘biological clock’ isn’t my weakness. It’s your final deadline to prove you’re worthy.

61 shares on Instagram this month:

Nurse: “This may hurt.” Me: “My life hasn’t been much fun either.”

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

Some people don’t have a permanent handwriting. It depends on their mood and the pen they use.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

The worst person you know is studying psychology.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

I feel like an adult spelling bee would humble a lot of us.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has viewed:

How would someone cancel an appointment at a sperm bank? Do you just call them and say you can’t come?

Someone from 🇲🇰 has copied:

Every Sunday is superbowel if you eat enough chili.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

Welcome to your 40’s: oh you like surprises? here’s another chin. Surprise!

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

I might be late to a lot of places, but the airport is not one of them.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

I bought a 12 year old whiskey. His parents are furious.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

I can relate to America, because I too am about to enter a depression.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

Scrolling should count as cardio.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WeChat:

The problem with people starts when we expect things from them, or have anything to do with them.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Hold on, let me overthink this.

Trending via Discord:

Got so emotional thinking about the Toy Story aliens. They have each other.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Think about how many more lovers you’d have if a cross country high-speed rail existed. That’s what they are taking away from you.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Why steal office supplies from work when you could take an extra-long bathroom break and steal company time instead?

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Watched a movie on Netflix last night that was so bad, I walked out of my own house.

Going bananas on Messenger:

Whoever removed the 30th and 31st from February, come get the 14th too.

Spotted on Reddit:

Therapists are like, “You don’t owe anyone anything. Except me. You owe me 250 dollars for this session.”

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Who wants to do all my adult stuff for me today?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Ain’t no girls in my messages, just a bunch of verification codes.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Me waking up: wow, I can’t wait to go to sleep tonight.

Nothing makes me more stabby than when my husband ignores me and starts talking to the dog.

If Shakespeare were being born today, he’d be “Shaxxespyr.”

They should have a special lane for texting and driving.

The older I get, the earlier it gets late.

Waiting patiently for the alien invasion.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨