Appliances always know when you’re getting a tax refund.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

Could you set a lightsaber on low and use it as a back scratcher?

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

Due to foreseen circumstances, well within my control, I will be late.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

The problem is that you are in the dating pool when the other fish are in the ocean.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

I hate it when my body decides to get sick. I gave you a vegetable last week, how dare you.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

When people suck the life out of you, they should take some fat too.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

You think you’re aging well and then you feel an earlobe hair blowing in the wind.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: you either have a naked window neighbor or you are the naked window neighbor.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

People keep inviting me to stuff. I miss the pandemic.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has copied:

Autumn at last. Sitting on the sofa all day with a blanket and tea and watching movies. Just like in summer, but with a blanket and tea.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has viewed:

Roses are red. Daisies are white. I’m in a grumpy mood. My underwear is too tight.