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Commentary:
"January was like that unexpected guest who overstayed their welcome, and now February is here like 'Surprise, I'm your reward' 🎉🤷‍♂️ Who knew the shortest month could feel so long? 😆 #FebruaryStrikesBack"

awesome, February, getting, humor, January, month, over, reward, rude, sarcasm, winter

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Remind the demons under your bed that you’re the landlord, raise the rent.

2 months ago
authority, bed, demons, humor, imagination, landlord, rent
The older I get, the more I start to understand the appeal of birdwatching as a hobby. I do find myself watching these little troublemakers quite often.

1 month ago
animals, appeal, birdwatching, hobby, humor, i, leisure, little, myself, nature, older, pastime, start, troublemaker, understand, watching
I could never commit gun violence. The only things I know how to reload are my pill caddy and the batteries for the remote.

1 month ago
battery, caddy, commit, context, gun, humor, i, know, never, pill, reload, remote, things, violence
My car spider built a web across my steering wheel and now I can’t go anywhere.

1 month ago
across, annoyance, anywhere, built, car, driving, funny situation, humor, i, obstacle, situation, spider, steering, steering wheel, travel, web, wheel
I don’t remember what I wanted to be when I grew up, but I’m pretty sure it wasn’t a broke, stressed-out, over-thinker with no clothes that fit.

1 month ago
adulthood, broke, clothes, crisis, fit, grown up, humor, i, identity, identity crisis, over-thinker, overthinker, pretty, remember, self-deprecation, stressed-out, sure, wanted
I don’t need a midlife crisis. My whole life is a crisis.

1 month ago
crisis, existential, humor, i, joke, life, midlife, need, perspective, whole

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇴 has bookmarked:

You’re not going to believe this, but I was doing really well, and then your email found me.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

I have the bruises of a much more active person.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

Wow, this person is full of shit. Oh, I’m on my own page.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

Shouldn’t autocorrect be called autoassume?

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

I’m fat because I’m full of experiences, and most of those experiences took place at Mexican restaurants.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

It’s that time of year where every jacket you choose is wrong.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

When you have the money, you can go a whole day without eating. But when you’re broke, the dizziness starts at 6 a.m.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Telegram:

I’m eating sandwiches you haven’t heard of in jeans you can’t pronounce.

Making waves on Telegram:

Current situation: lying in bed, trying to manifest breakfast.

Spotted on Twitch:

Light is faster than sound. That’s why people seem so bright until you hear them talk.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Some things are better left unsaid, which I usually realize after I say them.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I spend half the day wondering if it’s too late for coffee and the other half wondering if it’s too early for alcohol.

Spotted on Threads:

lol is punctuation and LOL is laugh out loud.

Spotted on Twitch:

Gonna eat birthday cake all day because it’s someone’s birthday out there, and we’re about to celebrate together, stranger.

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Activity Log ✨

Awesome that January is over, but rude that our reward for getting through it is February.

Remind the demons under your bed that you’re the landlord, raise the rent.

The older I get, the more I start to understand the appeal of birdwatching as a hobby. I do find myself watching these little troublemakers quite often.

I could never commit gun violence. The only things I know how to reload are my pill caddy and the batteries for the remote.

My car spider built a web across my steering wheel and now I can’t go anywhere.

I don’t remember what I wanted to be when I grew up, but I’m pretty sure it wasn’t a broke, stressed-out, over-thinker with no clothes that fit.

I don’t need a midlife crisis. My whole life is a crisis.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

At first, big breasts were attractive, then suddenly it was big butts. I’m waiting for it to finally be big bellies.

The most unrealistic part of Christmas movies isn’t the existence of Santa… it’s that all these people have, like, a month off work with no interruptions.

Working on a laptop outside is an abysmal experience.

I don’t think inside the box and I don’t think outside the box. I don’t even know where the box is.

After smartphones, we never got pictures of Bigfoot anymore. You know why? That’s right: 5G killed all the Bigfoots.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

A friend of mine decided to cut all the toxic people out of his life, or so I was informed.

I don’t believe the phrase “if they wanted to, they would,” because I want to, and I don’t.

Avocado toast at a cafe: $10. Avocado toast from Uber Eats: $25. Avocado toast made at home: $550 (my labor is worth $115 a minute).

The bowling ball actually hangs out with the pins after work. There isn’t beef there.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

I was so locked in, to the point where we were tongue-kissing with morning breath.

Nothing says “not interested” quite like a Restraining Order.

In my 20’s: might hit the club tonight. In my 40’s: might go to the grocery store to listen to some bangers.

People that never want to leave the house unite! Separately at our own homes.

Controlling your anger at work is a job in itself.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Men be like, yes, I hurt you, but now you hate me, so I am the true victim.

Fact: Snow in November happens because people decorate for Christmas prematurely. You know who you are. Stop it.

You can make a salad without lettuce if you want, there are no rules.

If ever go missing, please only put pictures of me on the news where I look skinny and hot even if that means they won’t find me.

Thank you, God, for another day. Let’s get this 12-hour screen time.

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Awesome that January is over, but rude that our reward for getting through it is February.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Remind the demons under your bed that you’re the landlord, raise the rent.

The older I get, the more I start to understand the appeal of birdwatching as a hobby. I do find myself watching these little troublemakers quite often.

I could never commit gun violence. The only things I know how to reload are my pill caddy and the batteries for the remote.

My car spider built a web across my steering wheel and now I can’t go anywhere.

I don’t remember what I wanted to be when I grew up, but I’m pretty sure it wasn’t a broke, stressed-out, over-thinker with no clothes that fit.

I don’t need a midlife crisis. My whole life is a crisis.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

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