Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Reading some things is like doing mental gymnastics… but with extra facepalms and eye rolls thrown in for good measure. 🤦‍♂️🤯 #BrainRecoveryModeActivated"

brain, ever, having, humor, just, little, magnificently, read, reconcile, something, space, stare, stupid

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

35 shares on Discord this month:

Weekends are a scam. You spend one day exhausted and the other anxious… like, what was that?

54 shares on WeChat this month:

I had big plans to sleep in today, but my bladder canceled.

93 shares on WhatsApp this month:

A massage is not enough, I need to be rolled through a pasta machine.

24 shares on Discord this month:

Do you all introverts ever open a text and think, ‘I’ll reply when I have the energy,’ and then it’s three weeks, and you have to live with the guilt of being a horrible friend.

29 shares on Snapchat this month:

Sometimes I’ll call in, disguise my voice, and insist on speaking to me, or I’ll take my business elsewhere.

72 shares on Threads this month:

Can we all agree that Mini Cooper drivers need to put an extended flag on the back of their cars so the stalls where they’re parked stop looking empty?

19 shares on Facebook this month:

I have a bit of an inferiority complex. But it’s not a very good one.

29 shares on Facebook this month:

Oh right, like you’ve never let your kids stay lost in a corn maze just a little longer.

72 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If you see my account doing wild or out-of-character things, no worries. It’s not me, I routinely rent it out as an Airbnb.

48 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’m planning to eat the rich, but can I sub out fries for a salad?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇫 has copied:

I’m starting to think the real hell is just being stuck in an infinite loop of self-doubt and bad life choices.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

I love surprising my girl, today she woke up single.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

Sorry, can you repeat what you said? I didn’t have my glasses on.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

I really don’t believe all of these women are actually named “Sassy”

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

I’m in my 20s, but somehow I’m 16 and also 55 at the same time.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

Nothing in a household is said more lovingly than, “Can you bring me some toilet paper?”

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

My nickname in high school was “who?”

Someone from 🇮🇶 has copied:

My superpower? I can look you dead in the face while you’re talking and not hear a damn word you said.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

Insomnia sharpens your math skills because you spend all night calculating how much sleep you’ll get if you’re able to ‘fall asleep right now.’

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

I’m tired of commercials trying to be funny. Scare me into buying something. I want to be terrified of buying the wrong toothpaste.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Messenger:

When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

My husband has reached an age where he reads the menu out loud. The whole menu. And then he has questions. Please send help.

Breaking via Reddit:

Shout out to everyone who cooks at 180°C for 20 minutes, no matter what the instructions say.

Making waves on Slack:

Feel like if a bunch of gays were stranded on a desert island, they’d all drop that voice thing in, like, a day.

Spotted on Discord:

You should get a pension for having to go to school for so many years.

Spotted on Pinterest:

I always thought that aunts had a lot of money. Until I became one myself.

Just shared via Messenger:

I am AOL Instant Messenger years old.

Just shared via Reddit:

I’ve cut my fingernails too short and now I can’t open my shower gel. What’s the point of being well-groomed if I can’t smell like mangos?

Seen just now on WeChat:

It sucks when you realize it’s only Thursday, until you realize it’s Wednesday.

Seen just now on Slack:

She’s probably just not using her phone right now for the first time ever in her whole life.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Ever read something so magnificently stupid that you have to just stare into space for a little while and reconcile with your brain for having been subjected to it?

“You’re acting weird!” I’m not acting.

I hate interviewing. Just hire me. I stand on business, for real.

A bathrobe is being naked with plausible deniability and pockets.

We go together like coffee and cigarettes.

Don’t really want to have 6-8 pints and a takeaway tonight, but it’s Friday and rules are rules.

Gonna mess with my husband by texting “send nudes” when he’s in a work meeting.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Ever read something so magnificently stupid that you have to just stare into space for a little while and reconcile with your brain for having been subjected to it?

Keep the laugh going 😂

“You’re acting weird!” I’m not acting.

I hate interviewing. Just hire me. I stand on business, for real.

A bathrobe is being naked with plausible deniability and pockets.

We go together like coffee and cigarettes.

Don’t really want to have 6-8 pints and a takeaway tonight, but it’s Friday and rules are rules.

Gonna mess with my husband by texting “send nudes” when he’s in a work meeting.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨