Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

Whoops, accidentally said I couldn’t make it before they even said the date.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

Nothing tests your patience like a group chat blowing up your phone.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has downloaded:

Best thing about TikTok is you literally don’t need to follow anyone to have a good time.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

Maybe women decided to convince men that beards were sexy because they were sick of cleaning the washbasin after he shaved.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

Just in case you don’t know, it’s “piqued” your interest, not “peaked”.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

Pretty sure they’re naming prescription drugs by just grabbing random Scrabble tiles. “Oh hey, Qdilrox sounds good.”

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

Eating wings is the opposite of flying.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

I just can’t watch football, there’s too much “penetration in the backfield” for me to not giggle like an immature maniac.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

“The average CEO reads 52 books a year.” Yeah, because they’ve got nothing else to do.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has shared:

(To my coworker that’s a year younger than me) You’re like a son to me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,457

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Snapchat:

I absolutely hate being woken from a nap. There were other treadmills in the gym that dude could have used.

Going viral on Messenger:

A poorly timed two-factor authentication request will be the thing that finally kills me.

Going bananas on X:

When the Beatles say, “Come together, right now, over me,” what was that about? Why did they say that?

Shared recently on WeChat:

Not looking for a sugar daddy, but something more of a pay pal.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Clueless but committed – that’s my vibe.

Just shared via Snapchat:

You amuse me, Jester. You may enter my bed chambers.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Here’s to a new year of making the same old mistakes, but with far more enthusiasm.

Going bananas on Discord:

The nice thing about wintertime is that it’s darker for longer, so you see a lot less people.

Just landed via Pinterest:

We get it, comma, you went to Oxford.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

Is it a good sign when your therapist keeps saying Ka-Ching?

Every word wishes it could sound as fun as falafel.

3 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Why did the dictionary go to a Middle Eastern restaurant? It heard "falafel" was the life of the party! 😄🥙

every, falafel, food, fun, humor, language, pun, sound, wishes, word

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I love how all the movies about teenagers have to be set in the 90s or earlier otherwise we’d just be watching kids on their phones for two hours.

0

2 months ago

90s, culture, earlier, entertainment, hours, humor, i, just, kids, love, movy, nostalgia, phones, set, technology, teenager, watching, youth
If anyone needs me, I’ll be in a different realm.

0

5 months ago

anyone, different, different realm, escape, fantasy, humor, introvert, joke, me, needs, realm, social, social withdrawal, withdrawal
If you can’t laugh at yourself, I will.

0

2 months ago

comedy, humor, i, joke, laugh, self-deprecation, wit, yourself
Everyone hates on Gollum but he had the right idea: become a hermit, collect jewels, swim naked in lakes and pools, occasionally hiss at people who try to make you go places.

0

2 months ago

adventure, everyone, Gollum, hermit, hiss, hissing, idea, jewels, lakes, lifestyle, naked, occasionally, people, places, pools, right, solitude, swim, swimming, try
Old people understand Roman numerals. I for one.

0

2 months ago

age, humor, i, irony, numeral, old, old people, people, roman, Roman numeral, understand, understanding, wit
Tom and Jerry fooled me into thinking dogs bullied cats when it’s the opposite in reality.

0

2 months ago

bullied, bully, cartoon, cat, cats, dog, dogs, jerry, me, misconception, opposite, reality, thinking, tom

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

41 shares on Facebook this month:

I love how unforgiving soy sauce is. Cause you know immediately when you did too much with her.

11 shares on Facebook this month:

Trying to be cute today but my face isn’t cooperating.

16 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I make her eyes roll back. Not in bed though. I’m just annoying.

17 shares on Telegram this month:

I hope you all get laid soon, for your own mental health.

53 shares on Messenger this month:

I never had a year with this much thinking. I’ve been thinking since the 1st.

18 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Dear music, thanks!

80 shares on Reddit this month:

Why do my fully charged AirPods deplete at different rates? Do I listen harder out of one ear?

83 shares on Discord this month:

What’s really missing is a day between Saturday and Sunday.

48 shares on Reddit this month:

How do I become a billionaire by 9 a.m. Monday? Please, it’s urgent.

99 shares on Messenger this month:

If a beer is 8 bucks, it’s a show. If a beer is 14 bucks, it’s a concert.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

The first step is admitting that the other person is the one with the problem.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

Salt and pepper shakers add an air of mystique to any bathroom.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has downloaded:

I didn’t buy that thing I wanted but didn’t need, so I celebrated by buying a different thing I wanted but didn’t need.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

For this Halloween I’ve trained my eyebrows to leap off my face and destroy those who’ve angered me.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

If you find my upper lip mole sexy, wait till you see the dark spot on my MRI.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

I miss my bed. Why does it have to be so far from where I work?

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

Remember: no matter what anyone else thinks of you, it’s how you delude yourself that matters.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

The great thing about having a mouse in your house is that I’m sure it’s just the one mouse, probably.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

I don’t consider myself anything but average. However, I have aged well.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

I don’t remember what I wanted to be when I grew up, but I’m pretty sure it wasn’t a broke, stressed-out, over-thinker with no clothes that fit.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Pinterest:

Make every hug more interesting by mysteriously whispering, “the Dark Lord stands at the crossroads!”

Freshly posted on X:

Remind the demons under your bed that you’re the landlord, raise the rent.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I don’t understand why my husband has to pay for a UFC fight when he could just throw one piece of candy on the floor in front of our kids.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Coughing has finally overtaken speaking Arabic as the most taboo thing to do in an airport.

Shared recently on Instagram:

My new drivers license arrived and when I opened it, I gasped. How’d they get a picture of my mother?

Making waves on WeChat:

If you like pointing out beautiful scenery to three people who are on their phones, a family road trip is for you.

Live now on LinkedIn:

Is there an app yet that converts voice messages into text messages?

Spreading quickly via Discord:

I’m not saying I’ve aged like fine wine, but I am currently being stored in a dark place and avoiding sunlight at all costs.

Making waves on Facebook:

“Out of sight, out of mind” doesn’t work for donuts.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Every word wishes it could sound as fun as falafel.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I love how all the movies about teenagers have to be set in the 90s or earlier otherwise we’d just be watching kids on their phones for two hours.

If anyone needs me, I’ll be in a different realm.

If you can’t laugh at yourself, I will.

Everyone hates on Gollum but he had the right idea: become a hermit, collect jewels, swim naked in lakes and pools, occasionally hiss at people who try to make you go places.

Old people understand Roman numerals. I for one.

Tom and Jerry fooled me into thinking dogs bullied cats when it’s the opposite in reality.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨