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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

An escape room, but it’s just your thoughts. Good luck.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

I believe in you. I also believe in Bigfoot so don’t get too excited.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

Why do my kids have Veteran’s Day off, they haven’t done shit.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

I feel like smashing my phone would be cathartic.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

After a lot of experience, I can conclude that one can never actually cross “washing dishes” off the to-do list.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

Sorry, I can’t tonight. I’m busy taking things personally.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

What part of “I don’t want to spend any more money” don’t I understand?

Someone from 🇸🇩 has shared:

My favorite game is to guess if my headache is due to dehydration, migraine, malnutrition, stress, lack of sleep, poor position, or a brain tumor.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

Can you turn your swag off for one second and listen?

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

My Christmas letter this year includes a bonus DVD of my colonoscopy.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,382

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on YouTube:

Sharing wired earphones is a forgotten form of intimacy.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Forget being the bigger person, I’m going to just start barking at people.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

The delivery guy absolutely hates it when I call him my pizza mule.

Going viral on YouTube:

It was the worst of times, it was the worst of times.

Seen just now on Facebook:

It’s kinda weird that in order to go to sleep you have to pretend like you are already sleeping.

Trending via Discord:

Home is where you can say anything because nobody’s really listening, anyway.

Making waves on YouTube:

When you turn 50, they change the lightbulb in your fridge to that memory eraser from Men in Black.

Just shared via YouTube:

There are two types of people: those who are clueless about their kids’ schedules and the other who plan it down to the minute. And they end up marrying each other.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

You can always tell when a man is dating someone new. Why you going to the aquarium and the museum?

Broadcasted on Discord:

Saying “Who is it?” when the doctor knocks on the exam room door.

Everyone thinks they’re brave right up until a goose starts chasing them.

1 month ago

Humorous quote about bravery and unexpected goose chases with playful vibe.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Bravery is all fun and games until you meet a determined goose on a mission! 🦢😂 #GooseGotMeShook"

brave, bravery, chase, chasing, everyone, fear, goose, humor, right, unexpected, wildlife

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Social Media Stars ⭐

12 shares on YouTube this month:

Why do my fully charged AirPods deplete at different rates? Do I listen harder out of one ear?

23 shares on Slack this month:

The PhD student is someone who foregoes their current happiness in order to forego future happiness.

80 shares on TikTok this month:

The advantage of being an identical twin: you only need one gym contract.

76 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Source? Divine intuition, gut instinct, and cryptic symbolism from my dreams.

80 shares on Threads this month:

Rule #1 for family reunions: Always bring your own car so you can take off whenever you want.

13 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’m at the age where living in the woods and arguing with a raccoon sounds like a peaceful retirement plan.

14 shares on Telegram this month:

Women who don’t check a man’s phone will still use their intuition and dreams to find out if he’s cheating.

67 shares on Discord this month:

As a child, I had the impression that I would be offered free drugs by strangers much more frequently than the 0 times it’s happened.

69 shares on Pinterest this month:

Japan’s greatest tragedy is having the world’s best toilets and no Mexican food. What’s the point of owning a Ferrari if you never take it to the track?

21 shares on Slack this month:

Sorry for what I said when I was drunk. I meant every word.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

I lost my appetite for doing work. If you find it, you can keep it.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

If a company’s hiring sign says, “Come grow with us,” you’re about to do the work of 3-5 people.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

The bowling ball actually hangs out with the pins after work. There isn’t beef there.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has downloaded:

Alcohol is actually a performance-enhancing drug. But you’re not gonna like the performance.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has downloaded:

Sarah Connor would be awfully disappointed in us all, letting this Grok into our lives.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has shared:

“I’m either extremely productive or staring at the wall like I’m in a Victorian painting.”

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

Addicted to bad posture. Omggg, why is it so comfortable to give yourself scoliosis?

Someone from 🇮🇹 has shared:

There’s nothing scarier than sneezing with a full cup of coffee in your hand.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has viewed:

I just need to lie down for a couple of years.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has bookmarked:

If anime hair were real, there would be so much color dysmorphia. Like, imagine getting brown. I would be so pissed.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Great minds think alike. Unfortunately, so do stupid ones.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Everyone thinks they’re brave right up until a goose starts chasing them.

Intelligence is now free, and the golden age of the nerd is over.

Once when I was exercising, I realized that I was allergic to it. I was out of breath, sweating and my heart was racing.

“You look tired.” Yes, bro, I stayed up all night obsessing over things I have no control over.

Your twenties are for destroying and betraying yourself for nothing.

Took a personality test and the results just said “uh-oh”

If I were God, I’d tell everyone that I created the animals and that I don’t know what happened after that.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Everyone thinks they’re brave right up until a goose starts chasing them.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Intelligence is now free, and the golden age of the nerd is over.

Once when I was exercising, I realized that I was allergic to it. I was out of breath, sweating and my heart was racing.

“You look tired.” Yes, bro, I stayed up all night obsessing over things I have no control over.

Your twenties are for destroying and betraying yourself for nothing.

Took a personality test and the results just said “uh-oh”

If I were God, I’d tell everyone that I created the animals and that I don’t know what happened after that.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨