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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇬 has shared:

If you knock down a policeman, they’ll get backup.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

I’m gonna start cursing people out but with biblical phrases like I hope your crops wither and bear no fruit and the ravens eat your mustard seeds.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has shared:

Netflix should’ve just maybe mailed us all this fight on DVD.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has copied:

I think I just hit a Labubu with my car.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

Welcome to your 40s. A random back pain will be assigned to you shortly, and you’ll never know what flares it up every time.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

If I’ve offended you with my posts, I humbly apologize, I honestly did not think you could read.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has copied:

If I were to “picture everybody in the room naked,” I would be stunned and in awe of the beauty and diversity of the human form before me. But thanks for the advice.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

When you’re over 40 and a part of your body starts hurting for no reason that is nature sending a “what ya doing?” text.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has viewed:

Slowly I realize why Noah only took animals with him.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

I am awake and ready to be disappointed.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Jan 31, 2026

3,419

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on YouTube:

They should invent health insurance that insures your health.

Just landed via Pinterest:

How dare you? I’m literally the sweetest most rage filled person on earth.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I am the first person in my bloodline to attempt to become hot, and I can feel my genes fighting me every step of the way.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I got fired from my job at the massage parlor. No specific reason, apparently I just rub people the wrong way.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

No matter how bad your day seems, just remember that someone out there has line danced to Achy Breaky Heart.

Shared recently on X:

Dude, we’re biting off more than we can chew tonight if you want to pull up.

Just shared via Twitch:

Vaping: When you feel like smoking but don’t want to look cool.

Seen just now on TikTok:

“My family doesn’t have a black sheep,” I say, while everyone avoids eye contact.

Just shared via Pinterest:

You’ll be having a good day and then someone your age says they’re buying a house.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I’m so talented I can not only spill food on my clothes but I can get it on yours too.

Everyone’s gangsta until they spot a double rainbow in the sky.

15 hours ago

Humorous text about how surprises turn everyone into thrill-seekers, featuring a colorful double rainbow.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
🌈 Double rainbow sighting, the ultimate game changer! 😂 Suddenly everyone's tough facade melts away in awe of the magical phenomenon. It's amazing how nature's beauty can bring out the soft side in even the toughest of gangstas! 🌈🌈 #RainbowMagic #UnexpectedSofties

double, double rainbow, gangsta, humor, irony, nature, rainbow, sky, spot, surprise

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

86 shares on Threads this month:

The final level of being smart is just pretending you don’t know anything to make your life easier.

22 shares on WeChat this month:

Friends with no kids are like: Want to go to New Zealand this Friday?

37 shares on Slack this month:

It may look like I’m doing nothing, but in my head I’m quite busy.

93 shares on X this month:

A babysitter is a teenager who acts like an adult while the adults go out to act like teenagers.

17 shares on Telegram this month:

Last night’s dream could have been an email.

20 shares on Messenger this month:

Welcome to Twitter, someone from an unhappy home will attend to you shortly.

91 shares on TikTok this month:

Sorry, can’t make it, just remembered I don’t want to.

50 shares on YouTube this month:

When someone touches my phone, I automatically turn into a ninja.

54 shares on Snapchat this month:

Just imagine if farting were as contagious as yawning.

94 shares on WhatsApp this month:

By the time I meet the right person, I’ll probably be the wrong person.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

20 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s funny how you can annoy unhappy people by remaining calm.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

That moment you turn down the music while driving around looking for a street address, so you can see better.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

You know it’s bad when even a cheeseburger doesn’t help.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I love hard, but I stupid harder.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Because it is Friday, I will allow one beautiful woman to invite me for drinks.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Websites need to realize that no one ever, ever wants the site to be able to send them notifications.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

My nickname in high school was “who?”

22 folks are currently checking 👀

The best way to teach your kids about taxes is by eating 30 percent of their ice-cream.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Writers should get a direct line to the FBI so we can call them and give them a heads up when we’re googling ways to poison someone but just for a story.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

December turns me into someone who believes a fat man with a beard can fix everything.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,492

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

Marriage! Because your shitty day doesn’t have to end at work.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has shared:

I wanna date one of those guys who really loves their girlfriend.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

After my death, I’ll be very busy. The list of people to whom I want to appear as a ghost is getting longer every day.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

I have a man cold. Goodbye, world. Tell my story.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has shared:

I hate it when someone gives me a valid solution to my problem and I have to find something new to complain about.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

Sometimes I do random acts of kindness, like keeping my mouth shut, for example.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

I shaved my legs today and it was the fastest 3lbs I’ve ever lost in my life.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

“Are you ok?” Of course not. Next question!

Someone from 🇬🇲 has shared:

You learn a lot about someone when you marry them. For example, I learned I should have married someone else.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

You can always tell when someone is on a diet by how they scrape every last bit from that yogurt container.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Pinterest:

Don’t ever forget where you came from. That’s where you left your car.

Going viral on X:

Diet Coke is just a fridge cigarette.

Trending via Twitch:

I miss when we didn’t know what celebrities thought about anything.

Going bananas on Threads:

I always take two stairs at a time, that way if I fall, it’s only half the distance.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Every girl’s personal hell is being too excited about their birthday and it ends up being the worst day ever.

Seen just now on Twitch:

My phone is like my lover, it’s the last thing I see at night, and the first thing I wake up to every morning.

Trending via YouTube:

I just realized boobytrap backwards spells partyboob.

Just shared via Messenger:

Why the hell is it called the restroom? I am fighting for my life in here.

Going viral on Slack:

Bob Ross could paint a forest in 10 minutes. I’ve been ‘working on myself’ for years, and I’m still unfinished.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Looking forward to eight hours of trying to get four hours of sleep tonight.

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