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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇬 has copied:

My morning routine includes 20 minutes of staring at the ceiling thinking about how tired I am and debating if I really need to live today.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

I need a job where I don’t actually have to work.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

Instead of hairstyles and make-up, there should be YouTube tutorials on polite behavior.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has bookmarked:

Don’t ever forget where you came from. That’s where you left your car.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

If you don’t buy any snacks, you’re proud for a moment and then incredibly sad.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

No matter how bad your day seems, just remember that someone out there has line danced to Achy Breaky Heart.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

Just seen the cost of funerals and no wonder people are living longer.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

Why are poets thinking that they are the ones tortured and not those who read their poetry?

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

I don’t understand why “family-run” should be a sign of quality. North Korea, for example, is also family-run and doesn’t convince me at all.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

Stop trying to be liked by everybody. You don’t even like everybody.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,447

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Facebook:

I miss when my biggest problem was whether my Happy Meal toy matched the one from the commercial.

Just shared via Messenger:

Most men don’t actually want to do things; they just want to talk about doing them.

Just shared via Snapchat:

The only function of a middle name is so a child can assess how much danger they’re in.

Just landed via Threads:

Sometimes I wonder if the strangers I see when I go outside are actually the people I talk to online.

Spotted on WeChat:

I would reset the clock on your microwave for you.

Shared recently on Telegram:

I think I just hit a Labubu with my car.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Silk is a crazy material. “I like your shirt,” thanks. It came out of a bug.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

The way Christmas shopping expects me to have money right now is, honestly, disrespectful.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Shout-out to my embarrassingly squeaky ass bed frame that makes me sound more popular than I actually am to my neighbors.

Going viral on Discord:

To accommodate the size of my wife’s new water bottle, we’ve replaced the passenger seat of her car with a cupholder.

Fun Fact: Dove chocolate tastes way better than their soap.

1 month ago

Humorous quote about how Dove chocolate tastes better than soap, playful and witty.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Looks like someone did some extensive research in the name of personal hygiene! 🍫🧼 Who knew that the key to satisfying your sweet tooth actually lies in the soap aisle? 😂 Maybe next time we'll see a soap-scented chocolate bar hit the shelves! 🚿🍫 #SweetAndClean"

better, chocolate, comparison, dove, dove chocolate, fact, food, fun, fun fact, humor, soap, taste

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

59 shares on Messenger this month:

Julia Garner most confusing name because it calls to mind both Julia Roberts and Jennifer Garner, but she is neither.

69 shares on Messenger this month:

The 5 seconds in the morning, when I don’t yet know who I am, is the best time of the day.

24 shares on Twitch this month:

Scared to go on dates, cause what if I find the one and never be able to be single again.

51 shares on Messenger this month:

Welcome to your 50’s. Your doctor and pharmacist are both in your contacts now.

10 shares on WeChat this month:

Fall in love? I can barely fall asleep.

13 shares on TikTok this month:

My brain doesn’t sea typos until I’ve already hit send.

87 shares on Discord this month:

Hey boy, are you the sun? Because you were a big part of my life this summer but now I feel like I never see you.

89 shares on Twitch this month:

When planning dinner, remember that ice-cream has both calcium and protein.

61 shares on Twitch this month:

Can the AI bubble just pop already? Everyone hates this crap.

35 shares on X this month:

You ever get road rage while walking behind someone moving slowly at the grocery store?

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

23 folks are currently checking 👀

My favorite part of parenting is when the kids are bored enough to entertain themselves, but getting to that point is excruciating.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I use karate strictly as a last resort, after I’ve exhausted fleeing and screaming.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Biting the heads off all these gingerbread men if you wanna swing by.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

If you like true crime stories, I highly recommend the history of the Catholic Church.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Shoutout to all ladies dating silently without making noise on social media. May God give you another man as a bonus.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

90% of the ocean is unexplored, which means there could be a McDonald’s down there.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

“You’re so quick to cut someone off!” God forbid a girl actually has self-respect.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

See you when you get home from school, I whisper to my kid’s apple.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Of course, I also put my mobile down from time to time. For example, when someone tries to call me.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Instead of making a sound, car alarms that go off at night should blast your name so everyone knows it’s your car.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,622

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

Mike is short for Micycle.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

The first time I heard “big naturals,” I thought it referred to major outdoor landmarks such as the Grand Canyon or the Great Barrier Reef.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

My mom asked me where I’m taking her to eat on Mother’s Day. I told her we have food at home.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

Checking my iced coffee rewards points like it’s my 401k.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

“You shouldn’t let your cat jump on the counter”, my cat could take out a loan in my name if he wanted to.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

I made you something special for Mother’s Day, my kid threatened.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

Currently helping my nephew look for his M&M’s that I ate yesterday.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

Imagine hating me and I’m just over here doing an epic air-drum solo to ‘In The Air Tonight’.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

Nobody will know you’re stoned if you’re always stoned.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

If you get cremated after you die, you can be put into an hourglass and still participate in family game nights.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Messenger:

I didn’t like my beard at first… then it grew on me.

Just shared via Slack:

Cops wake up Christmas morning excited as hell to ignore their family and go sit on the highway with a radar gun for 10 hours.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

“Can’t wait till I get older” was the dumbest thing I ever said.

Shared recently on Telegram:

First date idea: Couples Colonoscopies.

Just shared via Twitch:

I say “long story short,” and suddenly we’re in Act III with an intermission.

Trending via YouTube:

I could own a thousand summer dresses, and it still wouldn’t be enough.

Spotted on Messenger:

At the plastic surgeon: Please, Doc, help me. My Barbie doll has appendicitis.

Shared recently on Discord:

Not to be dramatic, but learning how to read has ruined my life.

Breaking via Pinterest:

The more nicknames I have for you, the more I like you.

Going bananas on Reddit:

Revenge is a dish best served by cutting a sandwich horizontally instead of diagonally.

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