Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

Three serious exes is the right amount before you meet your spouse. You need one truly evil one, one normal one, and one situationship, and then you’ve basically experienced all dating has to offer.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

Cats spend two-thirds of their lives sleeping, and the other third making viral videos.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has bookmarked:

You are depressed because your ancestors fought, danced, and ate meals together, and you eat alone in the dark while staring at a glowing rectangle.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has bookmarked:

My morning routine includes 20 minutes of staring at the ceiling thinking about how tired I am and debating if I really need to live today.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

I was raised to be humble which I excel at cause I excel at everything.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

Many people love saying, “Get these away from me,” after eating a few chips.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

Grateful to be living in the “Tetris when it’s going too fast and blocks are helplessly piling up” era of human history.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

So apparently they don’t count as sit-ups if you’re just trying to get out of bed.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has shared:

Might make a living will because I don’t want my family deciding whether to pull the plug. My dad has a long history of being against wasting electricity.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has copied:

Babe, you’re not acting according to my delusions right now.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

429 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,698

Funny Quotes Topics

17,716

Funny Quotes Images

15,698

Updated

Jan 13, 2026

Users Online

3,442

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Reddit:

Wait. We’re now turning plants into burgers? Haven’t cows been doing that like, forever.

Seen just now on Reddit:

You guys can continue with the week, I’ve stopped here.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

My toxic trait is thinking every inconvenience is the universe personally attacking me.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

The feminine urge to start a coven.

Just shared via Telegram:

Establish dominance by dropping your panties first.

Shared recently on Threads:

My dream is being pitted against the world’s greatest AI in a writing contest and crafting a story that’s so beautiful that I make the computer cry.

Going viral on YouTube:

Even worse than a spider is a spider that just disappeared.

Going viral on X:

If you’re soft, don’t come to my house, cause my kids will roast you.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Diet tip: Your pants can’t get too tight if you never wear any.

Going viral on Slack:

After having a week off, my boss returns to work today. Please respect my privacy during this difficult time.

Funny 90s movie quotes

New funny 90s movie quotes 👇

What happened to the huge corporate Christmas parties you see in all the ’90s movies? Seems like that doesn’t exist at all anymore.

4 weeks ago

90s, 90s movie, Christmas, Christmas party, corporate, corporate party, culture, exist, holiday, holiday party, huge, movie, nostalgia, office, office culture, party, seems

All funny 90s movie quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

15 shares on Telegram this month:

Asking the birds outside my window if they know any Metallica.

10 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’ve been so stressed about getting my shit together that I haven’t gotten any of my shit together.

33 shares on TikTok this month:

‘You’re going to die alone!’ Okay, when did dying become a group project?

70 shares on YouTube this month:

Why be just a part of the solution when you can be the whole problem?

10 shares on YouTube this month:

Marriage is like a phone call at the night: First there’s the ring, and then you wake up.

71 shares on Instagram this month:

Revenge is a dish best served by cutting a sandwich horizontally instead of diagonally.

97 shares on Messenger this month:

The term “domestic housewife” implies the existence of a feral housewife and that is what I aspire to be.

87 shares on Reddit this month:

Wolves are just dogs that nobody has called a “good boy” yet.

97 shares on Messenger this month:

You’re acting up? Right before Santa Claus comes to town? Unbelievable.

44 shares on Pinterest this month:

Achieving AGI by reducing the intelligence of the average human rather than increasing the intelligence of AI.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇭 has shared:

“AI is coming for your jobs”. I’d like to see AI show up drunk on Fridays and sexually harass my coworkers.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has shared:

Saw someone from high school. She said she hadn’t seen me in years. That’s likely because I’d always seen her first.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

It’s cool how seeing a less flattering photo of an attractive friend does not change my perception of them at all, but seeing one of myself makes me want to jump off a bridge.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has bookmarked:

Do you think Yoda says “7-6” instead?

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

The pointless tidy-up before a play date.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

Sometimes I don’t have anything intelligent to say and sometimes I don’t let that stop me.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

Take my advice, I’m not using it.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

I feel like I’m in jail when I’m around unfunny people for too long.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has bookmarked:

Job interview: Where do you see yourself in five years? Me: Hopefully on a sabbatical.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

The lion doesn’t concern itself with the contents of your prior email.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Threads:

If the universe is continuing to expand then why does my rent keep going up?

Spotted on Threads:

Show me in the employee handbook where it says I can’t make weird noises in my cubicle.

Going viral on Twitch:

Halloween is a big day for dogs who love to absolutely lose their shit when the doorbell rings.

Spreading quickly via X:

The rainforest cafe won’t be authentic enough for me if they don’t bulldoze 40% of the restaurant while I’m there.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

How many calories does an audible sigh burn? Because I don’t think my Apple Watch is giving me credit for them.

Shared recently on Messenger:

My phone is on Do Not Disturb because I am disturbed enough as it is.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

I can’t be the only one who screenshots confirmations, even though you’ll get an email and text.

Trending via TikTok:

Boss: Why do I have to always come and find you? Me: Because a good employee is hard to find.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Not a gold digger, but the other night a woman told me her grandpa owns a Christmas tree farm. That shit had me rubbing my hands like a fly.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny 90s movie quotes

New funny 90s movie quotes 👇

What happened to the huge corporate Christmas parties you see in all the ’90s movies? Seems like that doesn’t exist at all anymore.

All funny 90s movie quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨