Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

Marriage is like a phone call at the night: First there’s the ring, and then you wake up.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

I think I may need professional help. A chef, a butler and a maid should do it!

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

Life hack: You can’t be sad if you are asleep.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has copied:

Every cat is a little celebrity to me.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has bookmarked:

Telling an introvert to go to a party is like telling a saint to go to Hell.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

Never share a secret with a clock. Because time will tell.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

You know you’re getting old when you have to watch shows that are in English with subtitles.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

I wanted to wear some hot lingerie, but didn’t have any, so I put on this red dental floss.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

Fitness influencer: It’s important to listen to your body. Body: You’re old. And you want lasagna.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

I have more trips planned than I have money.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,768

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Twitch:

A wise man once said, “Bees don’t waste their time explaining to flies that honey is better than shit.”

Just shared via Instagram:

If your girlfriend doesn’t go a little psycho on you from time to time, then she’s not in love with you, sweetie.

Just shared via WeChat:

The more secure you want my computer password to be, the more guaranteed I am to just write it on a very not secure post-it note.

Just landed via Facebook:

Short men store so much anger in their little body.

Live now on Threads:

Girl math is avoiding shipping costs by buying more.

Just shared via YouTube:

People who don’t like pickles are so important because they give me their pickles.

Breaking via Pinterest:

I hate when flies rub their disgusting little hands together. What could you possibly be plotting? You can’t even get out of the open window.

Spotted on X:

I’m at an age where, when I’m tying my shoes, I think about what else I can do while I’m down here.

Trending via Pinterest:

We should just cancel April Fools Day this year. No prank can top reality right now.

Going viral on Reddit:

Why are moths always out at night when they like light so much? Wait til y’all find out about the sun.

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Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

12 shares on Pinterest this month:

I lied, there’s no sex. I just need you to change the batteries in my smoke detectors.

100 shares on Facebook this month:

Life is short, flirt with me!

26 shares on Telegram this month:

On my way to Mordor. You nerds need anything?

52 shares on Twitch this month:

Stop normalizing things, we’ll run out of the weird shit.

77 shares on Slack this month:

I love when the plot thickens.

45 shares on Slack this month:

The first time I heard “big naturals,” I thought it referred to major outdoor landmarks such as the Grand Canyon or the Great Barrier Reef.

23 shares on Twitch this month:

Eat like your treadmill is watching.

12 shares on Twitch this month:

Them: OMG, I haven’t seen you in so long. Me: Yeah, that was on purpose.

71 shares on Discord this month:

One does not simply become a master of karate. First, you must accidentally walk into a spider web.

40 shares on Snapchat this month:

Getting the house to yourself for a night is basically winning the lottery.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I often wonder how men could discover entire continents. Mine can’t even find the butter in the fridge.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

For my next trick, I’ll need a divorce lawyer.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I always tell my kids that it’s okay to make mistakes just as long as you learn how to blame them on other people.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Getting your hair washed by someone else is one of life’s greatest joys no one really speaks about often.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

If I’m ever the problem, you’re the reason.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

The worst part of coming out of a hyperfixation is sobering up and looking at all the merch you bought that you didn’t need.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Before Facebook, we would hold people hostage inside our homes by showing them photo albums of our vacation.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

The Welsh language was invented by a dad losing at Scrabble.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

“We will go ahead and make these changes if we don’t hear from you before Friday” is such an elegant way to solve problems.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I was in a good mood until I realized not only was it not Friday it wasn’t even Thursday.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,443

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

Has anyone seen my invisibility cloak?

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

The Gulf of Mexico should’ve been renamed to Sea Señor.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

Can you imagine how awkward it would be if your pet went on your phone and found the 1,000 pictures you have of them sleeping.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

You don’t know a person until you’ve seen them eat popcorn.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

It’s almost time to pack away the black summer clothes and unpack the black winter clothes.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

Your call is very important to us, here’s six days of irritating music.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

I’m so thankful I had a childhood before technology took over.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

Contrary to what we currently believe, we don’t choose afternoon naps. Afternoon naps choose us.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

I’m actually really peace-loving, but then there are other people.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

Everyone’s a gangster until they turn a spoon the wrong way under running water.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WeChat:

Going to hack Kanye’s account and make him post something normal.

Going bananas on WeChat:

For whom the Fetty Waps.

Going viral on Discord:

Who the hell keeps letting it be Monday again?

Spotted on Slack:

Therapy is cool but singing as loud as you can in your car is free.

Just shared via Reddit:

Just had a fight with every item in my closet. They started it.

Making waves on Messenger:

I’m not a fan of camping, if I wanted to sleep outside I wouldn’t pay my mortgage.

Live now on Discord:

I get it, credit cards, I’ve reached my limit too.

Just landed via Slack:

Pinterest recipe so long that it’s now a limited series on Netflix.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

I’ve started dating myself exclusively but it’s not working out.

Spotted on TikTok:

I’d change my name to laundry if it meant you’d think about doing me every day.

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