Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

I’m a pocket full of sunshine, not your dumping ground for grumpiness.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has bookmarked:

Reincarnation, in this economy?

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

Just let your girlfriend be crazy, like who cares, bro.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has shared:

I disagree with my politics.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

Being single is better than asking a man to act like a man.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has shared:

Many people mistake me for an adult because of my age.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

I believe my ex-wife is days away from having a nuclear weapon.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

The empty spot in your bed is for snacks, not liars.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has shared:

Today, I want to talk about underperforming continents. Antarctica, explain yourself.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

Sometimes happiness is just having a good night’s sleep.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,426

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Messenger:

I love how bananas just take over the whole smoothie. You can never dim her light.

Making waves on TikTok:

I don’t understand why “family-run” should be a sign of quality. North Korea, for example, is also family-run and doesn’t convince me at all.

Just landed via Twitch:

I’m going to need to speak with the flowers about this.

Making waves on X:

Declined stepping on the scale at the doctor’s office because no one needs that kind of negativity in her life.

Just shared via X:

If there’s no open mouth cougher on the plane they hold the flight until they can find one.

Shared recently on X:

In contrast to the ship, the movie Titanic was quite well received in America.

Spotted on Instagram:

Girls are happier when their dress has pockets, it’s science.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Just realised if I have a kid, they’re likely to see the year 2100… WTF?

Making waves on Slack:

Did you ever stop to ask how Mercury feels about being in retrograde? No, because you only think about yourself.

Spotted on X:

I can’t work under these festive conditions.

Funny bad memory quotes

New funny bad memory quotes 👇

One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.

2 months ago

bad, bad memory, happiness, humor, key, memory, optimism, perspective

All funny bad memory quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

10 shares on TikTok this month:

The clitoris has 8,000 nerves, if you gonna get on my nerves, get on one of those.

90 shares on TikTok this month:

Being weird never goes out of style.

37 shares on Reddit this month:

Honestly, will never top the year I told everyone I was going to be Amelia Earhart for Halloween, and then didn’t show up to the party.

54 shares on X this month:

You can talk about any topic for 30 mins if you’re a confident liar.

80 shares on Snapchat this month:

I don’t have an advent calendar, so I’m just opening cupboard doors and eating what’s in there.

90 shares on Telegram this month:

I need a job where I don’t actually have to work.

68 shares on Messenger this month:

Kinda miss being a child and wondering why the moon follows me.

38 shares on Pinterest this month:

I thought you are the sunshine of my life, but you are just a meteor trying to destroy my world.

23 shares on YouTube this month:

I wish I could get a bouquet of mozzarella sticks.

95 shares on Threads this month:

My favorite 90s skill: Uninstalling my car stereo and hiding it in my glove box in under 15 seconds.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇴 has viewed:

If paying a cashier a living wage will make prices go up, why doesn’t replacing cashiers with self-checkouts make prices go down?

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

Unless I ask, I genuinely don’t care to hear other people’s opinions on my life. It’s almost a pet peeve, really.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

I just ate, and now I’m going swimming, so I guess this is goodbye.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has viewed:

When I put on weight, it’s around my stomach. When I lose weight, it’s around my legs. I’m not a structural engineer, but that can’t be good.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has downloaded:

“Grey” is a better spelling than “gray” because “e” is a greyer letter than “a.” I will not elaborate.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has bookmarked:

My family asked me what I wanted for Mother’s Day, so I packed their bags and changed the locks.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has copied:

As a girl, I should be allowed to speak to the moon directly.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

I swear people go to Starbucks and just say random words. “Lemme get a grande iced mocha no foam quad soy hexagon vortex hypothesis with steamed ice”.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has viewed:

Text her when the moon looks pretty.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

When I learned the word “literally,” that was the beginning of the end.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on X:

Umbrellas are great if you only want to get wet sideways.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Love those deep burps that instantly make me feel like I lost 10 lbs.

Seen just now on X:

No one is more stressed than someone who has seen their potential and knows they aren’t living up to it.

Just landed via Facebook:

Twitter is a weapon of mass distraction.

Just landed via Facebook:

Hate how quietly iPhones die. At 5% it should start verbally begging for its life.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

An escape room, but it’s a bean bag chair in a hammock on a water bed in a bouncy house and you’re over 40. Good luck!

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Excuse me sir, are you going to finish that existential crisis?

Making waves on Messenger:

Sometimes I’ll do a random act of kindness, like keeping my mouth shut, for example.

Going viral on YouTube:

Sorry, can’t. Waiting for my clothes to come back into style again.

Going viral on TikTok:

I don’t know much about women, but they love containers that hold smaller containers.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny bad memory quotes

New funny bad memory quotes 👇

One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.

All funny bad memory quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨