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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

There are rumors that someone came down the chimney last night. This is preposterous. I would have lost my mind.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

That awkward moment when everything is going so perfectly… and then you wake up.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

Swimming is so embarrassing, everyone can see you want to be alive.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

This too shall pass, but what the hell?

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

I’m not worried about WWIII. I’ve been feeding a crow army for three years.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

Being skinny may be nice, but chicken nuggets are even nicer.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has bookmarked:

I made you snort laugh, so we’re going out, right?

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

If God had known what mankind would turn into, he would have sterilized Adam.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

Getting a second opinion about my Tamagotchi’s health.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

If you would like to get an idea of what an exorcism is like, try putting clothes on a toddler.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

522 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,115

Funny Quotes Topics

17,265

Funny Quotes Images

15,115

Updated

Dec 25, 2025

Users Online

3,632

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Telegram:

We put a man on the moon in 1969, and if you elect me to be your president, I promise that we will not stop until every man is on the moon.

Just landed via Discord:

Remember, guys, it costs zero dollars to be annoying to strangers on the internet.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Blowing kisses to my coworkers so that nobody talks to me today.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Google AI is awesome because it kills the planet and doesn’t work.

Shared recently on Slack:

Sorry, I would love to, but I just made a bunch of rules for myself, and I’m actually not allowed to do that.

Spotted on Facebook:

Not really into dating right now, but very into flirting, and that’s where things get complicated.

Spotted on X:

I would just once like to feel as powerful as a toddler throwing their sippy cup whilst sitting atop their high chair.

Just shared via WeChat:

How are they running out of oxygen if they’re breathing it right back into the submarine?

Just landed via Facebook:

Ah, summer. When my non-consensual relationship with mosquitoes begins.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Yes, we absolutely can push our meeting to sometime after the new year, or mid-March, or the year after next, or never.

Home » Funny Calculator History Quotes

Funny calculator history quotes

New funny calculator history quotes 👇

Forget my browser history, when I finally pass from this earth, please delete my calculator history because it’s way more embarrassing.

0

2 months ago

browser, browser history, calculator, calculator history, delete, Earth, embarrassing, forget, history, i, pass

All funny calculator history quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

76 shares on Snapchat this month:

Graduation advice: Stay cool. Don’t be a fool. Avoid being a tool.

64 shares on Discord this month:

If you think I’m evil, wait until you meet the man who made me this way.

37 shares on WeChat this month:

Sometimes the laugh is funnier than the joke itself.

56 shares on Slack this month:

The price of groceries has gotten me thinking about what acorns taste like.

55 shares on Reddit this month:

True friends don’t judge each other, they judge other people… together.

32 shares on Messenger this month:

Just saw a bird run across the street if you were wondering if anyone else is wasting their gifts.

12 shares on X this month:

And where did Mr. Pepper receive his degree from exactly?

10 shares on Discord this month:

If adulting had a return policy, I’d use it immediately.

59 shares on Threads this month:

The worst part about borrowing money is having to pay it back or move to a new city.

67 shares on Slack this month:

Aubrey Plaza is like an alien who went to earth to study us but accidentally got famous and can’t leave.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

Thaw me like one of your french fries!

Someone from 🇻🇺 has copied:

There’s poetry in walking away without closing the door too loud.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has downloaded:

Sisters are so important. How else would my mom find out all the stuff I didn’t want her to know.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

I start off my mornings with coffee and low expectations.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

If a zombie and vampire bite each other, who turns who?

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

I wouldn’t trust a single one of you with a flying car.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

That moment when a zombie out for brains walks past you.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

My Wi-Fi is stronger than my will to socialize.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

Who called it a period tracker instead of a madvent calendar?

Someone from 🇪🇪 has copied:

At the end of the day, the day is going to end.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Twitch:

Your 20s are for lusting after furniture you can’t afford actually.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

I’m at the age where I see a huge, beautiful mansion in a movie and think, “How much does it cost to heat that house in the winter?”

Seen just now on X:

It’s really hard to come back after a poorly executed high five.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Getting my next boyfriend a flip phone. He doesn’t need anything more.

Live now on Instagram:

Work can be tiring at times, and you might feel like quitting. But remember those plane tickets.

Going bananas on X:

I wonder if my date ever found her way out of that corn maze.

Going bananas on Instagram:

If you stare at your face in the back of a spoon you look a lot like someone who doesn’t know how to use cutlery.

Just shared via Discord:

Can’t believe we stayed up and screamed “Happy New Year” for this shit.

Making waves on Facebook:

Life always has it’s ups and downs. I like to up the music, down the drinks, and then relax and enjoy.

Spotted on Discord:

Why does tiredness on the couch not follow me to the bed?

Wordgag 🎅

Activity Log ✨

Funny calculator history quotes

New funny calculator history quotes 👇

Forget my browser history, when I finally pass from this earth, please delete my calculator history because it’s way more embarrassing.

All funny calculator history quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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