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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

If you’re worried that you added too much cheese to the recipe, I am here to reassure you that you did not.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

I need to go back to Friday. I want to do my weekend differently.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

When I take a shower I’m: 5% cleaning myself, 10% singing, 85% making life changing decisions.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

Sorry I was late, I was frantically applying to other jobs.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

Guys will say, “I know a spot,” and then take you on a downward spiral.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

If your problem can’t be fixed by coffee, tequila or sex then I’m out of advice.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

My toxic trait is optimism.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

“What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger!” Oh, it’s ok, you can just kill me next time.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

How can I be expected to get out of bed when I don’t want to?

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

God: “I don’t regret the Flood, but I do regret the Ark.”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2415 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,577

Funny Quotes Topics

15,246

Funny Quotes Images

12,577

Updated

2 minutes ago

Users Online

3,445

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Discord:

Texting random numbers “It’s done.”

Making waves on Reddit:

Yeah, no worries, man. You just showed everyone that you have a lot of resentments bubbling underneath, but otherwise, it was a cool evening.

Seen just now on X:

Using Indeed feels like being an ugly guy on a dating app.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Venting to ChatGPT is crazy, y’all turning schizophrenic.

Seen just now on Messenger:

You now have the chance to be the first person to send me nudes.

Making waves on Facebook:

Nothing has improved the quality of my life more than living beyond my means.

Trending via Discord:

The Gen Z stare. The millennial pause. Instead, let’s talk about the boomer inappropriate personal question.

Live now on LinkedIn:

I fractured my laziness and dislocated my interest.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Me, as a therapist: “OMG, me too!”

Just landed via Instagram:

How do you text “okay” but in the rudest way possible?

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2415 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,577

Funny Quotes Topics

15,246

Funny Quotes Images

12,577

Updated

2 minutes ago

Users Online

3,447

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

Taking a sip of beer and letting out a big “ahhhh” so the pregnant lady at the pool next to me knows what she’s missing.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

Let’s take a family trip in this beautiful weather so the kids can complain about family, trips, and beautiful weather that has no wifi.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has viewed:

If you’re a mad scientist, put a note in your laboratory reminding you to sometimes be a happy scientist.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

Filling animals with helium is kinda weird, but whatever floats your goat.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

‘Blinded by the Light’ is really just a song about turning the bathroom light on in the middle of the night.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has downloaded:

Receipts are like: Take this tiny piece of paper home with you and throw it away.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

I drink all this water and for what. Just to pee? This planet is a prison.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

The first person to realize you can eat bone marrow must have really hated that cow.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

I just feel like we shouldn’t have a new year until we get this one right.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has shared:

Life hack: If you never leave the house you don’t have to worry about running into someone you don’t want to talk to.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Threads:

Aside from cocaine, has anyone figured out what that little pocket on your jeans is for?

Seen just now on Instagram:

The only thing you can count on with some people is that you can’t count on them.

Seen just now on YouTube:

When I trip, I always look back to see who or what did it, because it couldn’t have possibly been my fault.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Being famous on social media is like being rich in Monopoly. It’s not real, so calm down.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

If you’re feeling lonely, start a small business. Then you’ll have a little company.

Seen just now on Instagram:

My three favorite things are eating my family and not using commas.

Just landed via Twitch:

Asbestos? I’m doing asbestos I can.

Just landed via Reddit:

At bedtime, I ceremonially move the claw clip from my hair to the bag of chips, signifying the end of the day.

Going viral on Telegram:

If I met someone like me, I’d be really concerned for them.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Drive as I say, not as I drive.

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