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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

Growing your own tomatoes really is the best way to devote 3 months of your life to saving $2.17.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

It’s Mother’s Day Eve so remember to leave out a bottle of wine for Mom when she comes down the chimney.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

Sports are better when you have hate in your heart.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

Toddlers will take your last nerve, deep fry it and eat it for breakfast.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has shared:

TMZ will find out you’re dead before you do.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

Massage therapist asked how I felt about chiropractics and I told her the guy who invented it says he learned it from a ghost, and that shut the conversation down pretty quick.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

I love reaching into my messy bag looking for something and everyone around me hears like glass breaking and bombs going off and a cat meowing from inside there.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has downloaded:

I refuse to take a single bite of my food until I find something good on TV.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

I need to consult the woods about this.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has viewed:

My couch better stop looking at me like that, it knows exactly what it’s doing.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

241 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,510

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,510

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,240

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on X:

Got a new Roomba but keeping the old one to see if I can get them to fight.

Trending via WeChat:

Please do not test me. I’ve been saving up my rage like PTO.

Spotted on Telegram:

Life is what happens in between trips to the fridge.

Trending via X:

What’s a beginner hobby for someone just getting into being happy?

Making waves on Facebook:

My wife had a dream that I have a secret second wife named Linda. Now, when she’s mad at me, I just say, “Linda wouldn’t get mad about that.”

Just shared via Discord:

Italians, look away now. I break my spaghetti in half before I cook it.

Live now on LinkedIn:

Every year I realize how dumb I was a year ago.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

I miss making out in public and making people feel uncomfortable.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Coke Zero sounds like a government pledge to eliminate fizzy drinks by 2030.

Trending via Reddit:

Cashier: Did you find everything? Me: Did you hide something?

Funny chomsky quotes

Funny Chomsky quotes bring a clever twist to serious topics, blending sharp wit with deep ideas 🤓✨ Get ready to chuckle while pondering language, politics, and life — all through the eyes of the legendary thinker! Whether you’re a linguistics geek or just love a good laugh, these gems will brighten your day and spark your brain 🔥😂 #SmartLaughs #ChomskyVibes

New funny chomsky quotes 👇

All funny chomsky quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

14 shares on Threads this month:

The ways printers are like kids: Need feeding, are noisy and can’t function when offline.

29 shares on WhatsApp this month:

April Fool’s next week and still no one has asked me to be their fool.

67 shares on Threads this month:

Companies post open positions online and then ask you why you applied to them.

22 shares on Reddit this month:

I didn’t mean to gain weight. It happened by snaccident.

11 shares on YouTube this month:

Super excited to not contribute anything worthwhile today.

57 shares on Twitch this month:

Tried to pull off a smokey eye, ended up looking like I went three rounds with McGregor.

75 shares on LinkedIn this month:

No one talks about the horrific event of meeting someone who is exactly your type.

37 shares on Slack this month:

The way turkeys feel about November is probably how treadmills feel about January.

93 shares on Threads this month:

The week before your period doesn’t make any sense… until you realize it’s the week before your period.

80 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Every citizen over 18 should be eligible to be drafted into the Postal Service.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

No revenge, because to know me only as a memory is to suffer.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t judge me on my likes, I’m confusing the algorithm.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

“Are you okay?” No, it’s literally Monday every 15 minutes.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

My goal in life is to not have to commit seppuku.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Your suitcase just texted. It’s getting bored.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m 27 and a half. I should be on my first divorce by now.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Changing my passwords regularly has certainly helped protect my accounts. Against me.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Have an early flight tomorrow, so naturally I’m going to stay up late tonight and be weird in my room.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

You know that tingly little feeling you get when you like someone? That’s common sense leaving your body.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

The egg doesn’t swim to the sperm, girl. Never chase a man.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

241 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,510

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,510

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,483

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

When I was in elementary school, we learned about a shape called a rhombus, and that was the last time I ever heard about that shape ever again.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has shared:

Crazy how people can merge perfectly at McDonald’s, but not on the highway.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

If my calculator had a history, it would be more embarrassing than my browser history.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

TV lead me to believe grave digging would be a lot easier.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

I set up my Nativity scene, but since baby Jesus hasn’t arrived yet, Mary, Joseph and all the Wise Men are just looking down at their phones.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

Unpopular activity: minding your own business.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

That little stroll to the coffee maker makes me happy every morning.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

Robert De Niro always looks like he just smelled a nasty fart.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

I sometimes have the desire to meet certain people again for the first time. Only to simply walk past them.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

I appreciate the interest, but I’m officially removing myself from the running to be the next James Bond. Thank you for your understanding.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Anyone who says there are no stupid questions is welcome to drop by my office. My colleagues will prove you wrong.

Seen just now on Threads:

Country music is for men who need a little help crying.

Just landed via TikTok:

My favorite color is money.

Just shared via Threads:

I don’t always carry all the groceries on one arm, but when I do, my keys are in the wrong pocket.

Going viral on Discord:

I’m so lucky people can’t hear what I’m thinking.

Trending via Messenger:

Being gracefully insane is the secret to a happy life.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Do y’all ever get pre-annoyed? Like, you already know someone is about to piss you off.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

I’m not saving daylight. I’m the one that needs saving.

Making waves on Twitch:

I’m already cold. I know me and my low iron ain’t gonna survive winter.

Going viral on Threads:

I start each day assuming it will be horrible and go from there.

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