Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇰 has downloaded:

Can someone please invent 8 hours between 9 p.m. and midnight?

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

Today, I’m going to give it my almost.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

There are TV shows that only exist on the screens of girls’ houses you go to one time and never again.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has downloaded:

Old age comes at a bad time. Once you finally know everything, you start to forget everything you know.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

Don’t come to my house unannounced. I will stare at you from my window.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

There are drug-sniffing dogs, guide dogs, dogs that save lives. And then there’s my dog, who hits the lead when he poops.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

Your dog immediately knows you’re leaving when you put on nice clothes… only because you usually look homeless when you’re at home.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

A job interview is basically a conversation between two liars.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

Another day on this hamster wheel to nowhere.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

My superpower is holding onto stuff for years and throwing it away exactly one week before I need it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,440

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Messenger:

The only thing smart about you is your wisdom tooth.

Just shared via Twitch:

Extrovert self made too many plans and now introvert self is pissed.

Seen just now on Reddit:

The little umbrella is so unnecessary. Like, my drink is already wet, bro.

Spotted on Reddit:

I hope this email kills us both.

Making waves on YouTube:

Pornhub should do a wrap-up of your year like Spotify does.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Proudly doing my part to cause the male loneliness epidemic.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

I just turned on my car’s seat warmer to keep my burrito warm in case you wondered what I was up to.

Trending via Messenger:

Everyone’s “the nicest guy ever” until the cops are in their backyard digging up several bodies.

Trending via TikTok:

After weeks of using an anti aging cream, I can now proudly say: I now have very well-maintained wrinkles.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Does bisexual mean twice as sexual or once every other sexual?

Funny cross-legged quotes

New funny cross-legged quotes 👇

All funny cross-legged quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

39 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Just let your girlfriend be crazy, like who cares, bro.

95 shares on Facebook this month:

When is a robot gonna take over my job? Please?

13 shares on TikTok this month:

The circus does not condone the actions being taken by its monkeys.

23 shares on Threads this month:

The peace of not knowing.

46 shares on Discord this month:

Y’all ever skip a class and then have the post-skip class depression? Like, damn, I should’ve just gone.

63 shares on LinkedIn this month:

“Can you multitask?” Yes, actually I am losing my mind and chilling at the same time.

14 shares on Facebook this month:

Being completely ignored on Twitter is associated with higher IQ.

87 shares on YouTube this month:

Suffering from a forehead kisses deficiency (self-diagnosed).

50 shares on Twitch this month:

Runners who smoke need to pick a side.

51 shares on Discord this month:

Female breasts are nature’s anti-stress balls. The irony is that they are connected to the biggest stress-inducing device.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Curly fries are my favorite as they’re salty and spiraling, like me.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth. Then it’s a soap opera!

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Do you think they’re called cough drops because when you cough really hard they drop out of your mouth onto the floor?

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Hey, sorry I’m late, I didn’t want to come.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

“I asked ChatGPT.” Okay, well, I asked my mom.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

The tragedy of my life is that I theoretically know when I shouldn’t say anything. And then I hear myself talking.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes, I feel like I need love, but the moment I finish eating, I realize I was just hungry.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

When I die, I hope it’s early in the morning, so I don’t have to go to work that day for no reason.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I prefer to use deodorant immediately after shaving my armpits so that I can feel that I’m still alive.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Who decided that “microwaves that beep forever” was a feature we needed.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,743

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

Politics top tip: Gain people’s trust by telling them that everyone is lying to them.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

Maybe the reason Miss Piggy is still single is she has a fear of kermitment.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has bookmarked:

Somebody should market a beer called “Occasionally”. So when asked, I can say, “I only drink occasionally”.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

I’m going to write a book about all the things I should have done with my life. l’ll call it my oughtabiography.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has downloaded:

I will not stop replying with gifs. I am a Millennial, it’s my birthright.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has shared:

How do people post 25 times a day? The only thing I can do 25 times a day is pee.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

Think I’ll get high enough to find out if there’s a God. Stay tuned.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

Interviewer: So why do you want this job? Me: I don’t. I just need money.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

Yoga is just slow motion breakdancing.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has downloaded:

Sometimes I just stand in the sun and stare at nothing, like a dog.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Threads:

“I’ve never met a medical receptionist that I believed wanted me to live.”

Freshly posted on Instagram:

You think you’re your own worst critic? Just wait till you have kids.

Breaking via Snapchat:

Why make new mistakes when you can keep repeating the same old familiar ones.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

You didn’t lock in hard enough if you’re not feeling asexual.

Breaking via Pinterest:

You know that moment when you get up in the morning, you’re full of energy and you can’t wait to get to work? Me neither!

Just landed via WhatsApp:

You ever wake up in the morning and your first thought is ‘I can’t wait to go to bed tonight’?

Spotted on Discord:

Every day Facebook tells me I have memories and wants to show them to me. It’s like they have no appreciation for the cost or the amount of liquor I needed to erase them.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Sometimes you have to sit back and imagine what life could be if it wasn’t a horrifying nightmare.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Me gasping and flipping off the vultures as they circle above the running track.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

That awkward moment when someone you hate is breathing.

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