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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

I’m sick of blessings in disguise. I am ready for a blessing with absolutely no disguise whatsoever.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

You know that moment when you get up in the morning, you’re full of energy and you can’t wait to get to work? Me neither!

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

Welcome to your 50s… A new pain will be be assigned to you shortly.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

This entire month could’ve been an email.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

If you wanna make someone cry, just show them the earliest year they can retire.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

Everything is dishwasher safe if you don’t care enough about it.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

If trees offered Wi-Fi, we would plant more of them. Too bad they only produce this oxygen thing.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

Pirate: walks the plank. Someone’s dad: Is this teak?

Someone from 🇮🇷 has bookmarked:

So you mean to tell me a stress ball is not for throwing at people who stress you out?

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

The three people who like every single one of my posts are going in my will.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

769 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,931

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,931

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,437

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Facebook:

I’m always in a rush to go home, and do absolutely nothing.

Spotted on Instagram:

Damn boy, are you a horoscope? Because I’m selectively focusing on the parts of you that make sense for me.

Live now on Snapchat:

It’s beginning to cost a lot like Christmas.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Horse girls and cat ladies get all the attention, but what about crow women?

Just shared via TikTok:

Opening up to a woman is like talking to the police, anything you say can and will be used against you.

Making waves on Slack:

I will never understand people’s fascination with their ancestry, isn’t knowing your current family bad enough.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

So I got a call from a telemarketer, and he said he couldn’t understand me. I told him, “Press 1 for English.”

Going viral on Snapchat:

Currently helping my husband look for his $20 I spent yesterday.

Trending via Twitch:

Life always has it’s ups and downs. I like to up the music, down the drinks, and then relax and enjoy.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

We all got a little Barbie in us (the microplastics).

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

769 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,931

Funny Quotes Topics

13,902

Funny Quotes Images

10,931

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,441

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

I’m rearranging the kitchen which is devastating for my husband because now suddenly he remembers where everything used to be.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

If you ever feel like something’s missing in your life, it’s probably me.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

Lying to stupid people can give you a profound sense of satisfaction, it can also make you president.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

Oftentimes, I like the idea of an activity. The actual doing of said activity, not so much.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has viewed:

Before you have kids, ask yourself: how patient am I with really stupid people?

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

What happened to my ankles tonight mosquitologically can never happen again.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

My sleeping pattern ain’t even a pattern anymore, it’s a freestyle that’s on shuffle.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

I tried meowing back at the cat to show him I was making an effort, but he just switched to English.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

One minute you’re young and wild, the next minute you’re into air fryers.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

On my way to Mordor. You nerds need anything?

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Discord:

My body looks like I have a great personality.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Bringing a fitted sheet to a knife fight.

Live now on WeChat:

Let the good times roll. Let the bad times crawl. Let the acceptable times do the hopscotch.

Trending via Telegram:

Shrimp: “When I grow up, I want to be food waste at a gala.”

Just landed via Reddit:

Whoever coined, “No good deed goes unpunished”, must have fed some seagulls.

Just landed via X:

My boss told me to start every presentation with a joke. The first slide was my paycheck.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Until further notice the days of the week are now called thisday, thatday, otherday, someday, yesterday, today and nextday!

Freshly posted on WeChat:

I’ve officially reached the age where I don’t want to do anything after 9pm.

Seen just now on Messenger:

It takes guts to be an organ donor.

Trending via Pinterest:

I feel so discombobulated when supermarkets switch up the aisles without texting me first.

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