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Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

“I should’ve peed before I left,” will be my epitaph.

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Yoda, seeing himself in 4K: HDMI

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

I cannot imagine being in high school right now. Imagine the world is eating itself alive and you’re in school.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has shared:

Three out of five times, my intuition is right. Not in casinos, though.

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“I’ve tasted going back to an ex, and I’ve tasted trying to fix a relationship before it breaks. I highly recommend focusing on your career and going to sleep before 10 p.m.”

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“The heart wants what the heart wants,” I whisper as I slowly walk up to the dessert table.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

If you don’t have dating allegations with your best friend, you are not bestfriending hard enough.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

If you accuse me of yelling, you will start to hear yelling so you can note the difference in the future.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

I think I may need professional help. A chef, a butler and a maid should do it!

Someone from 🇬🇹 has shared:

I don’t want to brag but I walked into a room and remembered why I walked in.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,689

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Twitch:

My toxic trait is treating my glasses like they’re not the most expensive thing I wear everyday.

Live now on LinkedIn:

I need a button in Zoom meetings where it just freezes my screen and makes it look like I’m having network issues.

Spotted on Discord:

The best cuddles are the ones where you don’t have to deflate her when you’re done.

Breaking via Pinterest:

You don’t need to explain yourself if you carry a chainsaw.

Trending via Reddit:

I don’t understand, “kill them with kindness”; can I use a lightsaber instead?

Spotted on Threads:

A hostile alien invasion sounds like a nice change of pace.

Spotted on X:

Not going is the new leaving early.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Happy return of “yes of course it’s bedtime, see how dark it is outside” to all parents who celebrate.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Getting mad at your hair is a whole different kind of angry.

Home » Funny Favorite Quotes » Page 16

151 Funny favorite quotes

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My favorite pastime is staying up way later than I should and complaining the next day about how tired I am.

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5 months ago

am, complaining, day, deprivation, fatigue, favorite, humor, i, late, later, next, pastime, procrastination, should, sleep, sleep deprivation, staying, staying up late, tired

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25 shares on Reddit this month:

Trust my gut? The thing that can’t even handle milk.

44 shares on Reddit this month:

Of course there’s birth control for men. It’s called the way they act.

95 shares on WeChat this month:

Filling animals with helium is kinda weird, but whatever floats your goat.

88 shares on LinkedIn this month:

People who don’t talk to themselves are the weird ones.

42 shares on Twitch this month:

My best three minutes of sleep are the ones right before the alarm goes off.

78 shares on Reddit this month:

If you have a pure heart, you can make pretty much any non-baking meal off just vibes and intuition.

18 shares on Instagram this month:

If you want your kid to play with their toy just give it to your other kid. Follow me for more parenting hacks.

67 shares on Messenger this month:

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they’re the ones who can sign you into a home.

66 shares on Messenger this month:

I don’t want to end this year on bad terms with anybody. Could you please apologize to me?

36 shares on Instagram this month:

It’s crazy how genuinely entertaining it is to stare into an open fire. That’s some real epigenetic memory shit.

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Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

No, baby, I’m not dumping you. I’m just rebranding myself as your ex.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

I live in my own little world. But it’s ok, they know me here.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

Good morning. May your day be as beautiful as I am.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

Someone needs to press pause on this weekend.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has viewed:

The sexual tension between me and not finishing the last 2 episodes of a drama.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

I don’t see why walking is healthy. Zombies walk constantly and they look awful.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

Spoiler alert: Eventually you will pay a price for the way you treated people.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has downloaded:

I really want an emotional support octopus so I can train it to slap people and shoplift.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

There are real people living amongst us who pay for Discord Nitro.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

I’m at that point on a Monday where no.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Reddit:

I just wish I had the confidence of my husband who thinks everything only takes 5 minutes.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Dear Santa, Money!

Just landed via Discord:

Foot fetish should just be called feetish.

Trending via Facebook:

You tell people you’re not trying to drink and they act like you just turned down 100k.

Broadcasted on Discord:

If there’s no open mouth cougher on the plane they hold the flight until they can find one.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Am I the only person who would rather almost fall over carrying the shopping than walk a second time?

Just landed via X:

“I’m giving my daughter a male name, ain’t nobody cracking an Abdul.”

Shared recently on Snapchat:

If you would just let me help, you’d be in an even worse position than you are now.

Spotted on Twitch:

Like a fine bourbon, we get better with age. Or, at least, … we feel better about our age after drinking lots of bourbon!

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I like that blood pressure kits come with a free, handy zip-up bag that your stuff will never fit in again once you take it out.

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151 Funny favorite quotes

More funny favorite quotes 👇

My favorite pastime is staying up way later than I should and complaining the next day about how tired I am.

All funny favorite quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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