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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇩 has shared:

How dare you? I’m literally the sweetest most rage filled person on earth.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

Sometimes I wonder if the strangers I see when I go outside are actually the people I talk to online.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has viewed:

When I say “I’m open to feedback” I mean “I accept compliments.”

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

Just read the Ten Commandments for the first time and you can’t do shit with your neighbor.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

According to a recent study, women who are a little overweight live longer than men who mention it.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has shared:

After much deliberation, I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m an overthinker.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

They say time is the solution to every problem. I’ve been waiting for five hours already and the room is still messy.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

Feeling guilty for taking up the entire therapy session talking about myself.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

All my life choices led me to this post right here, and if that’s not an indictment of free will, I don’t know what is.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

Nobody says “boom shakalaka” like they used to.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,347

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Them: OMG, I haven’t seen you in so long. Me: Yeah, that was on purpose.

Shared recently on Messenger:

I have to work because the baby is expensive. (I’m the baby.)

Trending via X:

Yes, my date did get up and leave during dinner, but luckily she hadn’t finished her food.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

They should invent a food that sounds good for dinner tonight.

Spotted on Twitch:

One sec, lemme just find the off switch for my brain.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Scientists just confirmed that our dreams were real in another reality.

Just landed via Messenger:

Women will be like “I know a spot,” and then take you directly to hell.

Live now on Discord:

Just did a seductive hair flip and an onion ring flew out.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Alexa, take responsibility for my actions.

Seen just now on Facebook:

I don’t know much, but I know this: the older you get, the faster the number of things you’re willing to wait in line for approaches zero.

Funny first class quotes

Funny first class quotes bring a humorous touch to the luxury of top-tier travel. ✈️😆 From witty observations about premium perks to playful jabs at the indulgences of first class, these quotes celebrate the lighter side of flying in style. Enjoy a laugh and revel in the fun of first class! 😂🍾

New funny first class quotes 👇

All funny first class quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

57 shares on Threads this month:

This is my phone. I text back when I want to.

94 shares on Twitch this month:

My friends wife threatened to leave him over his Star Wars collectibles and I was like “divorce is strong in this one”.

37 shares on TikTok this month:

Parallel lines have got so much in common, it’s a shame they’ll never meet.

31 shares on Twitch this month:

You can’t change your past but you can change your pasta.

71 shares on Instagram this month:

I wish I was as tired in bed at night as I am after lunch at work.

58 shares on Messenger this month:

If you get drunk and message your ex, don’t worry. When you wake up, send bitcoin ads and pretend you were hacked.

64 shares on Snapchat this month:

Girls don’t actually shop. We just walk round touching the clothes saying ‘this is cute’.

91 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Is it cool if I come into your life and just never leave, like a stray cat?

60 shares on Messenger this month:

I love saying “exactly” to stuff that doesn’t make sense.

29 shares on Threads this month:

My stress stresses me out to the point where I’m too stressed to deal with my stress.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Honey, get in the car. We have to go to the store because we’re retarded, and it’s Christmas Eve.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

My boyfriend talks to everyone while I stand by quietly, planning my escape.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

People always ask me why there’s a chair in my shower. Who the hell eats breakfast standing up?

9 folks are currently checking 👀

My favorite childhood memory is having energy.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Can someone come over and take this phone away from me?

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I am cassette tape years old.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

A marriage is about solving problems together, you know, those problems you wouldn’t have if you were single.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

The reason most of us stay up late is because we don’t want our free time to end, and tomorrow to start.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

We need a holiday at the end of every summer that honours all the women who wore sundresses.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Am I just getting older, or are people getting more annoying?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,333

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

Don’t be alarmed at my semicolon usage; I’m a professional.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

If a baby comes out feet first, technically it wears its mom as a hat.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

My fitness goal is to lose two straight jacket sizes.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

Adding “scroll for two hours” to my To-Do list, so I won’t do it.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

The second half of your life begins when you stop wanting to get even and start wanting to get odd.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

I don’t understand people who don’t have kids. Imagine having absolutely nobody to blame when you’re late.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

Penguins are just ducks going to a wedding.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

If you accuse me of yelling, you will start to hear yelling so you can note the difference in the future.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

Me (young, naive): “I hope something good happens.” Me (now): “I hope whatever bad happens is at least funny.”

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

Anyone know how to get an air guitar out of a vacuum?

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Twitch:

Is ChatGPT down for anyone else? I’m a neurosurgeon in the middle of brain surgery.

Just shared via Messenger:

Sometimes a man’s purpose is to simply remind you again and again that you’d be just fine on your own.

Going viral on Instagram:

Lazy is such an ugly word. I prefer the term selective participation.

Going viral on Discord:

Someone you haven’t talked to in forever will show up in your dream just to do a backflip.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

People just don’t build cities on rock and roll anymore.

Going viral on X:

I need you to think about me 23/7. You get 1 hour a day for yourself.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

If women came with instructions, men wouldn’t read them anyway.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Unloading the dishwasher in the opposite direction just to feel something.

Just shared via Reddit:

Welcome to middle age. You now take pictures of instructions so you can enlarge them.

Just shared via X:

Witnessing karma is awesome . . . witnessing instant karma is more awesome.

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