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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇻 has shared:

Vanilla perfumes are so nice. It’s like walking into a bakery but you are the bakery.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

They are mad because you took that knife out of your back and used it to cut ties.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

Boss: You’ll never find another job like this. Me: That’d be great.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

Am I the only one who prays about everything? Like, ‘God, please help me find where I dropped my AirPods.’

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

Back then, my parents were afraid of what I would do on the Internet. Today, I’m afraid of what my parents do on the Internet.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

Maybe coffee is addicted to me?

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

Being offline for so long gave me the time to appreciate what’s really important in life, so I’m back online.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

The Recipe for Disaster in me, recognizes the Appetite for Destruction in you.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

I assume people who bookmark my posts are building a case against me.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

If it weren’t for the last minute, I’d never do anything.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2312 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,474

Funny Quotes Topics

15,183

Funny Quotes Images

12,474

Updated

22 minutes ago

Users Online

3,439

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on Twitch:

Can someone please fix the algorithm of my life?

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I wear black because it’s slimming. Exercise is also slimming, but like I said, I wear black.

Just shared via Pinterest:

I am single, please disturb me!

Just landed via Messenger:

I hate hotel bath towels. So thick and fluffy, I can’t even close my suitcase.

Just landed via YouTube:

Person in murder documentary: This is a small town. Things like this don’t happen here. Me: Um, based on the shows I watch, that’s all that happens in small towns.

Just landed via Messenger:

Folding laundry is like packing to stay home.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Life is short, unless you’re listening to a kid describing an episode of PAW Patrol.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Be gentle with me, I’m from the 1900s.

Just landed via Messenger:

I crashed my bike in 1989 and hurt my knee real bad. We didn’t have social media back then so I’m telling you guys now.

Spotted on Threads:

It sucks when you realize it’s only Thursday, until you realize it’s Wednesday.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2312 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,474

Funny Quotes Topics

15,183

Funny Quotes Images

12,474

Updated

22 minutes ago

Users Online

3,448

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

When I say “I’m open to feedback” I mean “I accept compliments.”

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

The only thing Flat Earthers have to fear is sphere itself.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

I would do absolutely anything for my friends, except answer their text messages.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has copied:

It’s a good thing when your therapist sits down with a bucket of popcorn, right?

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

Listen kid, I have social media profiles older than you.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has copied:

I’m so good at sleeping that I can do it with my eyes closed.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has viewed:

Do you ever want sleep but sleep doesn’t want you?

Someone from 🇮🇹 has shared:

My dentist plays country music, so it’s like a double torture.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has shared:

You need a twins name suggestion? How about Kate and DupliKate?

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

I don’t understand how spending more money than I earn is irresponsible. I’m giving more than I take. I’m generous.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Britney Spears working at an ice-cream shop called ‘Scoops, I did it again.’

Shared recently on Facebook:

Oh, sorry, I can’t right now. I’m imagining some things and worrying about them.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Can someone please help me, I’m still at the Fyre Festival.

Shared recently on Slack:

I don’t understand all the fuss about ChatGPT – I have teenagers who already know everything.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Started from the bottom and I’m still ain’t shit.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Hey cell phone companies who play smooth jazz hold music hoping I’ll lose interest and give up: yeah, it’s kinda working.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

Eating spaghetti to forgetti my regretti.

Breaking via X:

One thing I hate more than a liar is a liar that thinks I’m dumb.

Seen just now on X:

Folks, please have more respect for people with glasses. Because they pay money to see you.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Sorry, I liked your post one second after you posted it but in my defense, I’ve had my phone in my hand since 2012.

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