Wordgag ツ

6 months ago
Share →: Tolerate the lactose already, you heathen.

Commentary:
"Dear lactose-intolerant heathen, it's time to embrace the dairy and join the milky way of life! 🥛🐄 Don't be cheese-ist, lactose is gouda for you! 😉"

For even more funny heathen quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny heathen quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

I may regret the megabytes I’ve wasted, but I’ll never regret the megabites I’ve tasted.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

Have kids so you can fully appreciate how well your dog listens.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

Do clouds ever look down on us and say, “This one is shaped like an idiot”?

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

A dating app called Unhinged where you agree to meet up and fight each other.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

I have no beef with vegetarians.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has viewed:

Whenever an insect rides for miles on my car, I imagine it thinking: “Oh crap, moving again!”

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

I don’t even want to talk about the things I had to do to that elf to get back on the nice list.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

Being excited to get in bed really is a different level of adulting.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has bookmarked:

“Well at least I don’t have to wake up any more.” Is what I want my tombstone to say.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

The cashier said, “Have a good day,” but she doesn’t mean it.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Be a pineapple: stand tall, wear a crown, and be sweet on the inside.

Reported on Reddit:

Coworker: Where are you going after work? Me: Away from you.

Live now on Reddit:

Overthinking should at least burn calories.

Seen just now on TikTok:

I was born to be wild, but only until around 9pm or so.

Spotted on Instagram:

Sometimes I delay my haircut intentionally to look rugged just to make that glow-up more iconic.

Trending via Twitch:

Stay an extra hour in the office and no one cares. Arrive a few minutes late and everyone loses their minds.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

I used to think the cat was dumb for staring out the window, waiting for birds, but I’d probably stare too, if occasionally a pizza flew by.

Going viral on X:

I love diss tracks because it’s basically two dudes going, “grr, we hate each other so much we’re going to take turns writing increasingly personalized poetry!”

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Got possessed by a demon once, and everyone was like, “OMG, did you do something with your hair?”

Making waves on YouTube:

Outfit repeater. Meal repeater. Movie rewatcher. I know what I like.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny heathen quotes

New funny heathen quotes 👇

For even more funny heathen quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny heathen quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

My ex had this fetish where he would dress up in his own clothes and act like an idiot.

No crypto for me, thanks, at least not until I figure out how dollars work.

Stephen King’s It is the bone chilling story about adults who are forced to spend time with their childhood friends.

Just saw someone my age running and she wasn’t chasing an ice-cream truck.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

The only function of a middle name is so a child can assess how much danger they’re in.

When someone giving me directions says, “You can’t miss it,” I would love to tell them just how wrong they were if I could find my way back to them.

Just paid rent. Now I have a place to starve in.

I’m at the gym and I just saw someone put their water bottle in the Pringles holder on the treadmill.

The inventor of autocorrect walked into a bar and ordered a bear.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Ohhh, I just realised you can change your facial expression. I was just doing the one.

Hate it when my alarm goes off in the morning, and I’m still alive.

Imagine hearing the ice cream truck music, but at night.

Turns out my superpower is the ability to go into incredible detail in completely the wrong direction.

The laundromat should give you XP and ranks like “Slimelord” and “Glunkfather,” based on how dirty your clothes are.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

IKEA is the swedish word for “relationship meltdown in a public place.”

Humans should grow a new set of teeth in our 30s to make-up for all the poor decisions in our 20s.

I wish there was a nicer way to say “my natural tendency to spot patterns is making me feel very uncomfortable about you”.

It’s too bad he never woke up and chose violence. “Bob Ross, mob boss” has a nice ring to it.

I was born a boy, but according to the packaging, I identify as a family of four.

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏