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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

All the best memories with my dad start with “Don’t tell your mom about this.”

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

It’s not true that I had nothing on. I had the radio on.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has downloaded:

This Thanksgiving, don’t ask me questions about my life, just pass the mashed potatoes.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has viewed:

My extravagant lifestyle of paying for housing and buying groceries is really getting in the way of my ability to save money.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

I’m not fat. I’m just easy to see.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

Sure, breakups are hard, but have you ever had to wait for your phone to stop ringing so you can start using it again?

Someone from 🇳🇮 has copied:

I stopped adding “Let me know if you have any more questions!” to my emails because don’t email me again.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has shared:

There’s going to be a full moon this Christmas! Because mixing family and alcohol together wasn’t enough…

Someone from 🇰🇭 has copied:

I am officially at the age where old people think I am young and young people think I am old.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

So I just keep making dinner? Every night of my life? For forever?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

242 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,511

Funny Quotes Topics

17,578

Funny Quotes Images

15,511

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,313

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on X:

Netflix will help you finish spelling the name of the movie you’re looking for, and then tell you they don’t have it.

Just landed via Messenger:

It takes a lot of balls to golf the way I do.

Spotted on YouTube:

Humidity is great because then people think it’s not my fault that my hair looks like this.

Just shared via Pinterest:

The only time anyone should watch the news is to study how psychological manipulation works on the general public.

Shared recently on Threads:

I’ve never met a garlic bread I didn’t get on with.

Just landed via Twitch:

Breaking news: Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

I’m the Usain Bolt of running late.

Broadcasted on Threads:

I put my pants on just like everybody else: when the police tell me to.

Trending via Twitch:

How do you react when you see someone you respect on an e-scooter?

Going bananas on X:

I set up a Nativity scene, but since baby Jesus hasn’t arrived yet, all the Wise Men are just looking down at their phones.

Funny lanceolatum quotes

New funny lanceolatum quotes 👇

My dog just tracked and successfully located a folium lanceolatum, more commonly known as a leaf.

0

2 months ago

canine, dog, folium, folium lanceolatum, humor, joke, just, lanceolatum, leaf, nature, pets, tracking

Someone from 🇸🇰 has recently shared this quote.

75 shares on Discord this month.

All funny lanceolatum quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

40 shares on YouTube this month:

If there’s one thing we can trust, it’s billionaires.

48 shares on Messenger this month:

It’s important that everyone takes really good pictures of me this summer.

70 shares on Pinterest this month:

Eating cookies left for Santa because the cowboy was a no show.

65 shares on Pinterest this month:

My washing machine is over here taking load after load, like Bonnie Blue.

64 shares on Telegram this month:

I’m sorry for setting the impossible standards that the rest of you try to live up to.

97 shares on LinkedIn this month:

In filling out an application, where it says, “In case of emergency notify”, I put “Doctor.”

54 shares on WeChat this month:

Hey! (with the intention of going back to sleep)

99 shares on TikTok this month:

When phones were tied with wires, people were free. Now that phones are wireless, people are tied.

55 shares on Telegram this month:

They portray Pilates like it’s this cute girly thing and it’s actually training for combat.

13 shares on X this month:

We must all do our part for the planet. The other day I unplugged a row of electric cars nobody was using.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

Heard a recording of my own voice, and now I can never speak again.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

Eating the sticker on an apple counts as 35% of your daily fiber intake.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

I had too much to think last night.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

People who work in customer service should be allowed to fight one customer a day. Two on Fridays.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

Haunted Houses this year are just gonna have the news on.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

Getting the house to yourself for a night is basically winning the lottery.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

I love having plans to cancel.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has bookmarked:

Your 20s are for trying soup, making new soups, and discussing soup or soup related topics.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has downloaded:

Even if there’s a murderer behind me, finish chewing before you tell me.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has shared:

Can’t wait for the day off from work so I can sit on the couch at home and stare at the TV screen while thinking about work.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Threads:

I’m pretty sure emojis were invented so introverts don’t have to say anything to anyone.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny lanceolatum quotes

New funny lanceolatum quotes 👇

My dog just tracked and successfully located a folium lanceolatum, more commonly known as a leaf.

All funny lanceolatum quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨